Downtown Druid - Chapter 35Book 3 : The Greatest Joke Ever Told

In a zombie apocalypse world, Earth has become a place inhabited by people with twisted hearts. In a dog eats dog world, she struggled to survive and witnessed the deaths of love ones until she met her own gruesome death.

But she was reborn, she was back to the beginning of the end. She held a divine sword: meet a god, kill a god; meet Buddha, kill Buddha! Regardless of which methods, she will use anything in her disposal in order to protect her loved ones!

He is gentle as jade, just like his name. Despite his extremely poor shooting skills, he can make powerful people follow him faithfully. He has an army in his hand, and his power shakes the world.

They are two people who have never met in the previous life, yet their paths kept intertwining in this life. Is it fate? No, for Bai Ling, maybe it’s an evil one!

- Description from Novelupdates

“F**K! I'm dead!”That was the first word I muttered after regaining my memories from Earth.Reincarnating into a world of cultivation should’ve been a blessing. Adventure, immortality, power—what’s not to love?But then I remembered what my family did.My sister just broke off an engagement with a crippled young master—definitely a future protagonist.My mother ripped a Dao Bone from my cousin and gave it to me—guaranteed future revenge arc.And me? I’m already a third-rate villain: bullying weaklings and flaunting my Bai Clan name.Worst part? Despite the Dao Bone, I’m still trash at cultivation.My only hope?The System... which I’ve had for years.“I just never realized... It was in English!”

Copywriter:

On the first day of school, Wei Ru Song accidentally fell in front of Xiao Nian’s dick. With his girlfriend witnessing this incident and thinking that he was giving another man a blowjob, this led to a series of misunderstandings.

WRS : I’m not gay I’m not gay I’m not gayyyyyyyyyyyy!

XN : Neither am I.

WRS : Seems like we need to come up with a scheme to clear our names now.

XN : Ok.

So…

Counselor : I saw you and that junior doing it in the grass, *cough*, kiddo, please take note and be a bad influence.

WRS : No we just fell accidentally…

Neighbour : Wei Ru Song can you be quieter in bed? We couldn’t sleep the entire night.

WRS : No that was just Xiao Nian giving me a massage ahh…

Gym Teacher : You guys know what you did in the equipment room, go clean the mats!

WRS : Noooooooo that was just the milk I spilt!!!

Finally,

XN : Senior

WRS : Yeah?

XN : Since they already think we’re gay, why don’t we just let this work itself out.

WRS : … Just what I was thinking.

At home, she was invisible; after marriage, she was a decorative vase; in the end, a sea of flames buried her, and not even her corpse remained. This is the portrait of Han Yuxi’s previous lifetime. Given a chance at rebirth, she strives to improve herself, wishing only to no longer serve as a foil or a pretty face. Then, she will seek out an exemplary husband and live a life of peace and prosperity. Alas, things turn out contrary to her wishes—she marries a man who bears a blood feud and hatred as deep as the sea. She turns the world upside-down, but her road to happiness is strewn with setbacks and the sweetness that comes after bitterness.