I Cultivated Too Long and Got Isekai'd Into a Game - Chapter 33: Keep Your Hands to Yourself

Earth Immortals are cultivated from a blessed land.

In a world devastated by an unforgiving apocalypse, Qing Xia struggles against a life filled with despair. Surrounded by the suffocating remnants of society—polluted air, barren land, and the haunted expressions of humanity—he often envies those who have found peace in death, escaping the relentless suffering of existence. Yet, the memory of his family's sacrifice fuels his determination to endure, making him one of the last survivors in a landscape of desolation.But fate has other plans. During a routine mission, Qing Xia’s life abruptly ends, or so he believes. To his shock, he awakens reborn as an idol on the brink of obscurity, a mere shadow in a vibrant world. Eager for a second chance, he seeks solace in a newfound identity, yearning for a life filled with simple pleasures.However, tranquility slips through his fingers as he is thrust into an unexpected chaos—a variety show that pulls him into the heart of danger, where secret agents, ruthless hitmen, and shadowy figures lurk. With every step, the weight of his dreams collides with a reality he never wished to face. As he grapples with relentless uncertainty, Sian realizes that the struggle for peace may lead him deeper into turmoil. In this haunting journey, can he carve out a destiny in a world that seems determined to tear him apart? The winds of fate do not blow as one wishes, and with shadows closing in, every moment counts.----------------------------Black box:Someone: “Darling, help me deal with these people.”Sian: “Stay away from me. I have nothing to do with you or them.”Someone, with fake tears: “Darling, I’m hurt. Come kiss me here, and the pain will go away.”Sian, holding a military knife: “Does it hurt there? How about I just cut it off for you?”Someone, stripping Sian’s clothes: “Darling, you look so beautiful when you’re angry. I can’t take it anymore.”Sian: “Go to hell! Ah—ahh! Stop it—stop! That hurts! Quit biting me, you damn dog!”

What?!A perfect free-use novel doesn't exist?!.........So what? Just read this one.~~Hehe~~You're gonna love this, seriously.This is what cooking of three months is like.No degenerate out there can ever come close to my degeneration which helped me create this fantasy book.Milf?I have it.Young?I have it.Boob sizes?Is that even a question to ask.Ass size?Hmmm~~~ My favorite.Whatever you wish for, I got it.So come and follow the degenerate life of JakeMalcolm, the lucky son of a gun who was finally transmigrated to the world of his desire, using everything in his sight, his family the beginning and the end would be...Well, no idea who the end would be.So stay tuned to find out.~~First and foremost, this is a work of fiction. Any mention of a real person or religion is purely coincidental and all the work of my sick imagination.Read it, then decide if you want to stick to it. This is more likely a work of a whim so there might be holes that I might have to fill.Haha. Holes to fill.Anyway, this is more like an idea that progresses as the story does so if you have any fantasies that you'd like to implement, I'm open to them.Just don't overdo so the story doesn't spin too out of control.~~The cover's not mine and if the owner wants me to take it down, I'll do so without trouble.Bonus chapters of any sort would be decided upon once the novel goes premium, but before that, there is no schedule update. Just know that there'll be an update every day. Just not of how many chapters.Last but not least, read with an open mind and make sure you don't have any opinion to give until you're well into the story, whether good or bad.That's it. Enjoy~~

A broken prince, a shadowy scheme, all that amidst a bloody fight for a throne wrongly succeeded. Join a group of youngsters as they take their first steps into the martial world, towards the grandest adventure of their lives. It all begins in a certain inn, set against verdant mountains and facing a scenic lake.

“Bring us your finest wine and best meat!” Yelled a hulking man who seemed to be the leader of the dozen strong group.

“How much?” The waiter anxiously nodded his head.

“As much as you have!” The hulking man yelled back.

“That’s…”

“HUH?” The hulking man shot the waiter a furious glare.

“Dear guests, our inn operates on the principle of ‘pay first, dishes later’. As such, it will be better if you tell us exactly how much meat and wine you need.” Xiao Se returned their furious stares with a thin smile.

“Who are you supposed to be?” The hulking man eyed him with bulging eyes.

“This humble one is known as Xiao Se, the owner of this inn, the Fallen Snow Villa.” Xiao Se replied with the same smile and with a level of courtesy worth a solid 12/10.

“Well, we have no money.” The hulking man stabbed his blade into one of the nearby tables.

“Oh?”

“But I’m sure you have some!” The man pointed his finger at Xiao Se.

At that, Xiao Se furiously shook his head. “I’m sorry to break it to you but our little inn hasn’t made a single sale in almost a month. I’m about to owe them salaries myself…”

“Like hell if I care!” The hulking man smashed his palm down on the table. “Even if you have no money, that fur coat of yours should at least be worth a hundred odd silvers.”

“NONSENSE!” Yelled Xiao Se, eyes wide open and gaze as sharp as daggers.

The hulking man was stunned, his body even shivering involuntarily for that split second.

“I, Xiao Se, ride only the finest horse and wear only the richest threads! This fur coat of mine was specially sewn by some of the finest seamstresses in the imperial capital in the August Threads. Just sewing it took three whole months, shipping it, another one. Hmph, a hundred silvers? That’s not even enough to buy the sleeves of my coat!”