I Don't Want to Get Hurt, So I'll Max Out My Defense - Chapter 1081 - 1082: The Auction Begins

“Any who don the title of 'king' or anything of the sort in my presence is nothing more than an ignorant fool. This is my land and I shall be reclaiming it soon. I am Cacophony, the Vampire Empress!”As those words left her lips, every cell in my body reacted. It was unreal—no, it was otherworldly. Her beauty, her power, and her overwhelming arrogance. It might've been then that I realized that my normal life had ended.How did it come to this?Ah, it was curiosity. Yes, a deathly curiosity brought me to that graveyard that day.It was there that I stumbled upon her coffin. I had absolutely no clue what I was doing then, and even now I have no idea what possessed me to touch it—that single moment changed the course of history for the entire world. I found myself delving into a completely unknown world.Should I regret it? Maybe. But the truth is, I don't.Exploring the world’s hidden secrets, forging unexpected bonds, and living alongside the revived empress—it’s exciting.“Even if it's wrong, I think I'm going to enjoy every moment of it.”

Lu Xuanji transmigrated to the Zifu Realm and realized that cultivation was an arduous journey.Due to the monopoly of resources, the strong grew stronger while the weak turned weaker. His clan was in a difficult situation. As he munched on cold, leftover food, he thought of the pathetic situation that his clan was in.Thankfully, his cellphone transmigrated along with him.The File Manager app, which could store a large amount of information, was used to store 10,000 scrolls of martial arts techniques.The Fortune Reading app, which could analyze information input, was used to deduce future events and break down martial arts techniques.Google Maps, which showed panoramic views of different terrains, was used to locate enemies and identify spots for minerals.The Phone Banking service allowed him to exchange currency for spiritual stones.The mobile game, Orchard, allowed him to get spiritual fruits by planting trees.As such, Lu Xuanji led his clan to rise up to the pinnacle of life.

I found myself in a parallel universe, awakening as a male priest. Everything seemed perfect; after all, as a healer, specializing in aiding women should pose no issue, right? However, I couldn’t help but wonder about some peculiar spells in my repertoire.

Firstly, what in the world is the “Instantaneous Outbreak of Acute Gastroenteritis” spell? And don’t even get me started on the “Osteoporosis” spell. What purpose could these serve in my healing endeavors? The confusion only deepened with spells like “Blood Burn,” “Gradual Freeze,” and “Mental Chaos.” Can I still peacefully focus on healing women with such ominous abilities?

Comparing my spells to those of other professions, I couldn’t help but notice the stark contrast. Mages wield “Doomstorm” and “Ice Age,” swordsmen boast “Sword Rain: Homecoming” and “Wind-Cutter Slash,” while archers showcase “Arrow Rain: Shooting Stars” and “Storm Arrow.” Yet, my ultimate spells are disturbingly named “Cancer Cell Proliferation,” “T-Virus Infection,” and “Rabies Outbreak.”

In the midst of it all, a certain character, some crying girl, laments, “Noooo, I just took a bath, who would have thought that I would become infected!”

Meanwhile, a villain chillingly asks, “Do any of you know what it feels like to burst apart while spouting blood? No! You don’t know!”

Even a boss character confesses, “Dear family, who can understand? I just took a nap, and when I woke up, I suddenly found that I have no kidneys!”

As the future High-Ranking among Elven, I was meant to be dignified and holy—but my friends never gave me the chance. One is a human prodigy turned “cripple” after an accident, determined to prove everyone wrong. Another is the Demon King, whose idea of preparing for war involves turning his entire race into farmers. As I watch my friends stir chaos in their own ways, I can’t help but wonder—how did I end up in the middle of all this?