I Reincarnated As A Stick - Chapter 79: Spirit Aura

Guys here is my pitch.....In the sprawling world of fantasy, we’ve often been treated to tales of heroes reincarnated with divine blessings, legendary powers, or cheat-like abilities, thrust into magical lands as shining saviors—or chaotic terrors. But what happens when the very concept of reincarnation becomes a curse? When the divine boon is a big fat joke, and the “cheat system” doesn’t quite… cheat?Enter John, the unluckiest reincarnate. Blessed by a god and thrust into a fantasy world, he dreams of glory, power, and adventure—only to wake up as a normal, utterly powerless bird. Not a mythical phoenix, not an ancient thunder eagle. Just… a bird.To make matters worse, this world is no ordinary realm. It's a land scarred by the devastating legacies of past isekai’d heroes and villains, whose reckless exploits piled skeletons into mountains and turned their cheats into harbingers of chaos. Fed up with these unruly intruders, the ancients of the realm banded together to create a world-shaking seal: all reincarnated souls are trapped in the bodies of harmless animals, confined to isolated sanctuaries that function more like fantasy zoos.Here’s the twist: this isn’t mercy. It’s a resource grab. The powerful beast tamers of this realm have turned these reincarnated souls into exotic pets, prized for their cheat-like potential.John finds himself at the bottom of the food chain in every sense. His cheat doesn’t work. His human form is gone. And his world is filled with predatory cultivators who see him as either a snack or a tool.But John isn’t one to give up so easily. What starts as despair quickly turns into cunning survival. With wings and wit as his only tools, John must navigate layers of misfortune, dodge fate’s sharp talons, and cheat his way through a world determined to keep him grounded.Get ready to join John on a wildly unconventional journey—one where reincarnation isn’t a ticket to greatness, but a death sentence he’s determined to rewrite. His story is one of humor, wit, and persistence, as he explores a world where he is the joke and his survival is the punchline.Main tags: reincarnation/isekai, beast taming cultivation system, comedy, action, adventure.Of course No-harem!

Petite Princess VS Rough KhanOn their wedding day, Yelu Yan told Li Xianyun that apart from affection, he could provide her with endless wealth and honor.After the marriage, he indeed kept his promise, cherishing her in the palm of his hand.Little did he know, the more he cherished her, the deeper she burrowed into his heart, right to the very top.Not long after the political marriage with the Khitans, Li Xianyun gradually noticed earth-shattering changes around her:Initially, the commoners who disliked her began to worship her as a deity...The court officials accusing her of bewitching their lord were now pleading with her to consummate the marriage with the Khan...The most perplexing of all was her husband in name; wasn’t he the one who said he wouldn't give her emotional affection? Why was he always following her around?Little theater scene 1:One day, Yelu Yan cornered Li Xianyun against the wall.“Why are you avoiding this Khan?”“They say you might have taken a liking to your servant.”“Remove ‘might’, isn’t it obvious enough from how this Khan acts?”“But you said you wouldn’t give your servant emotional affection.”Yelu Yan held his forehead; he had indeed said too many foolish things.“The Han people always say that one should start a family and then establish a career; clearly, the two are not in conflict.”Little theater scene 2:The sun had risen high, yet Yelu Yan was still clinging to Li Xianyun.“Get up quickly, I have to leave. There are patients on the street waiting for my consultation, the good fields to the west need irrigation, the homestead plots in the east need measuring, and I have to oversee the silk reeling and dyeing... Uh...”“Your husband is a patient, don’t you care for him?”Li Xianyun looked at the man tough enough to rival ten bulls and was utterly speechless.

Lu Xuanji transmigrated to the Zifu Realm and realized that cultivation was an arduous journey.Due to the monopoly of resources, the strong grew stronger while the weak turned weaker. His clan was in a difficult situation. As he munched on cold, leftover food, he thought of the pathetic situation that his clan was in.Thankfully, his cellphone transmigrated along with him.The File Manager app, which could store a large amount of information, was used to store 10,000 scrolls of martial arts techniques.The Fortune Reading app, which could analyze information input, was used to deduce future events and break down martial arts techniques.Google Maps, which showed panoramic views of different terrains, was used to locate enemies and identify spots for minerals.The Phone Banking service allowed him to exchange currency for spiritual stones.The mobile game, Orchard, allowed him to get spiritual fruits by planting trees.As such, Lu Xuanji led his clan to rise up to the pinnacle of life.

Travel through the world of martial arts, get a god-level kidnapping system, and vow to be the number one kidnapper in the universe.

As long as you don’t want to tie it, there is nothing you can’t tie!

Guo Jing, your daughter has been kidnapped by Lao Tzu. If you don’t want me to do anything to her, you can exchange it with Jiuyin Zhenjing and Eighteen Palms of Subduing Dragon!

What, so obedient?

Then I’ll give you a grandson for free.

…………

Yang Guo, your aunt was kidnapped by Lao Tzu. If she knew the face, she would have cut up her own little penis!

What? Yin Zhiping, do you want to cut too?

Well, I will send you a dragon-slaying knife, cut iron like mud, and guarantee that there will be no pain!

…………

Duan Zhengchun, your wife and daughter have been tied up by Lao Tzu, hurry up and hand over all the martial arts secrets of Yi Yang Finger, Six Meridian Divine Sword, etc., and then kill yourself!

What? Want to have sex with your wives again before you die?

Fuck you, they have been scolded by Lao Tzu “Japanese…

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