MTL - Longevity Gourd - Chapter 184 net wind monkey

Rated 18+ [Mature scenes] [Netori].(Kids go read Shadow Slave. ಠ⁠_⁠ಠ.)—————Yo, meet Gezza, a basement-dwelling perv who’s more intimate with his laptop’s incognito mode than any real woman.His life’s a mess—crusty socks, nacho crumbs, and swimsuit posters mocking his lonely ass—until he swipes a creepy old book from a demolished library.The Playbook lets him write any woman’s name, and bam—she’s head-over-heels, seeing him as her dream stud.Gezza goes wild, banging his hot neighbor and eyeing a harem of Instagram babes, but here’s the kicker: every name he writes saps his mojo, leaving him with a cursed case of limp-dick doom.Will this sleazeball outsmart the Playbook’s price, or is he screwed in all the wrong ways? Dive into this raunchy, laugh-out-loud urban fantasy where lust meets cosmic payback!

Leon was supposed to disappear.On Earth, he was nobody.In this new world of cultivation, reborn into a body that wasn’t even his own, he was less than that — a forgotten teacher exiled to the quiet heights of Amethyst Summit Division.No glory.No backing.No destiny.Until the Grand Return System awakened.Every resource he gives… returns a thousandfold.Every treasure he parts with… comes back stronger.Every disciple he nurtures… becomes a storm the heavens cannot ignore.While the sect mocks him as a useless master wasting potential, Leon calmly shapes a silver-haired girl born with Divine Ice Bones into something terrifying. A legend in the making. A blade pointed at fate itself.They see obscurity.Heaven sees a silent calamity rising.Leon doesn’t seek fame.He doesn’t chase thrones.But when destiny finally turns its gaze toward him…The teacher who hid in the shadows will begin rewriting the rules of the world.-----

Kitazawa’s grades at the Ninja Academy had always been mediocre.Uchiha Itachi graduated at seven; he barely scraped through at thirteen.Uzumaki Naruto became the savior of the ninja world at seventeen; at that same age, Kitazawa was still struggling to make Chunin.In this harsh world of shinobi, Kitazawa was what people called a fodder ninja: no talent, no bloodline, and no backing.To stay alive until the story’s grand finale, he’d chosen the safest path—teaching at the Ninja Academy, a job he’d held for five years.“Another peaceful day in Konoha.”Kitazawa rose from his seat and walked to the window.It was enrollment day again, and the training grounds were buzzing with life.He glanced down at the stack of new student files in his hands. Names leapt out at him, all too familiar:Uzumaki Naruto, Uchiha Sasuke, Hyuga Hinata, Ino Yamanaka, Sakura Haruno, Akimichi Choji, Nara Shikamaru, Inuzuka Kiba… and more.'DING''Host has reached age six and successfully enrolled in the Ninja Academy.''Activating the Strongest Shinobi System.'