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... tumps arranged around a flat rock he was now calling "The Pussy Podium." Behind him, a crudely drawn diagram was etched into the dirt with a stick. It looked like a vagina if you squinted... and were drunk... and forgiving.

He clapped his hands once. Loud. Sharp. Authoritative. Like a man about to teach sexual anatomy to a crowd of glorified cavemen.

"Alright, dickbrains. Let's get one thing straight: none of y'all know what a pussy is."

The men blinked. One scratched his ...

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