Oh My God! Earthlings are Insane! - Chapter 1673 - Waiting for the Rabbit

“Why is this [Summoning Card: Goblin] wearing a mask?”

“Because it’s a Goblin Gangster!”

In a world where martial artists reign supreme, strength is everything. Unfortunately, that logic doesn't apply to a certain Florida Man.

Refined in the nuclear fallout wasteland, Leo was the strongest mutant alive. He carried an alien artifact, allowing him to exchange his lifespan for modern items. After 50,000 years of solitary life in a humanless world, he collected enough lifespan to transmigrate to another habitable world.

Leo was later thrown into a mysterious planet. He soon discovered that his body produced radiation, and it mutated the surrounding plants and grasses. Worrying that he might ruin the beautiful planet, he chose to live in seclusion.

Unfortunately, the local population soon discovered his existence, and a misunderstanding ensued.

Balthazar was just a random giant crab enjoying his life in a fantasy world full of bothersome human adventurers, but then he had to go and accidentally discover the secret of attributes and levels. And also pie. With baked goods and coin as his new life goals, he turns to the competitive business of trading the random junk adventurers loot every day.Follow Balthazar as he does everything to find a baker... except leave his pond, because exploring the dangerous world out there is for suckers. Witness how adventurers just can't seem to stop dying around his home. And cheer for a crab who makes great new friends by simply buying them.Book 2 is out now, with new chapters every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday, fresh off the bakery!What to expect from this story:- No harems, not unless they're a harem of gold coins.- Silliness, lots of it. The story doesn't take itself too seriously, so you shouldn't either.- The only kind of OP here is how “overpriced” the crab's deals are.- A system simple enough for a crab to use, but still conveniently complex when necessary, for some odd reason.- Proper realistic adventurers: they're not very bright, and they make very poor decisions.- Did I mention there will be pastries?

In the third year of the Kaihuang era, as the Great Sui began to unfold between the fall of the Northern Dynasties and the rise of the glorious Tang Dynasty, Emperor Yang Jian created the House of Blades – an intelligence agency for strategies and conspiracies – in preparation to unify the world.

On a snowy night, a convoy of tribute from the Kingdom of Khotan was raided. Not one soul survived the attack. Feng Xiao, Second Commandant of the House of Blades, was ordered by the Emperor to investigate the matter in person.

On the distant border, a storm brewed as major forces gathered from all sides in Liugong Town. The strong rubbed shoulders with the strong; the skilled crossed paths with the skilled.

Here, the ever-successful Second Commandant Feng ran into a wall for the first time – all because of a feeble Taoist priest with ailing health.

Some things would never be known if no fights were ever picked. Only through their skirmishes did Feng Xiao realise that this sick bastard seemed to have way more aliases and personas than he himself ever did.

- Description from Novelupdates