Once Human, Now a Parasite - Chapter 719 - 663: Ho Qing

Bad news: Xu Yanmiao traveled back to ancient times, but he himself is lazy and uninterested in anything but internet cybersecurity, which is useless in ancient times.Good news: He’s bound to a system.Bad news: The system is called the Gossip System, not the fortune-telling kind, but the kind that contains other people’s private information and scandals. Utterly useless.More bad news: This system is also glitchy, and the extent of the bugs is unknown.Even more bad news: This body is that of a minor official who can attend court meetings, while Xu, the time traveler… doesn’t understand the classics, can’t write with a brush, and is at risk of being exposed for cheating in the imperial exams.Xu Yanmiao: “…”Forget it, just lie low, wait to die, maybe dying quickly could lead to another time travel.…In the court, the emperor was furious about state affairs, and the courtiers trembled in fear.Xu Yanmiao pretended to listen attentively but was actually focused on browsing the Gossip System.[Wow, the emperor just took in a 16-year-old noblewoman yesterday! A beautiful addition! He’s getting stronger with age! And he was tossing and turning in bed all night but still has such a powerful voice now! Amazing!] [This noblewoman used to be the crown prince’s concubine! And the crown prince even knows how to write passionate love letters!] [Wow wow wow! The crown prince sneaked into the grandpa’s harem… hiss—got intimate while the old emperor was attending court! Do it quickly! Why isn’t there any video…] [Huh? Why is there no sound?]Xu Yanmiao cautiously raised his head and glanced around.[What happened? Why is everyone kneeling? Where’s the emperor?]—The emperor went to catch adultery in the harem.The “imperial exam cheating” bomb finally exploded.Xu Yanmiao couldn’t explain why his handwriting on the exam paper didn’t match his usual handwriting, nor could he answer why he didn’t understand the classics.The evidence prepared by the ousted crown prince of the emperor hit the nail on the head, and his personal bodyguard was ready to drag Xu Yanmiao away to the prison, awaiting execution in the autumn.Xu Yanmiao held onto the gossip that proved his innocence but was in a quandary:How do I explain the source of my information…[Say that I secretly met with the Chief Examiner, the Minister of Rites, three nights before the exam? Impossible, that night, the Minister of Rites was dressed as a woman, spent the night at the General’s Mansion, with the general…]The general’s body shook, and he interjected: “Your Majesty!!!!”“Although the evidence of exam cheating is solid, I believe there’s still something fishy about this. It should be re-investigated! Especially Xu… Xu… Xu Yanmiao’s attire is neat and tidy! Someone who cares so much about their appearance, how could they tarnish their reputation!”The crown prince, who couldn’t hear his thoughts: ??[Also, what’s with saying that the examiner faking yawning and tiredness was intentionally leaving me a gap for cheating? He spent the night before the exam in the pigsty without sleeping, how could he not be tired the next day? But, surprisingly, the Imperial Academy lecturer actually believed in pig’s milk…]The Imperial Academy lecturer’s face went pale, and he burst out: “Your Majesty!!!!”“I… I agree with the General’s words! How could Xu Lang cheat in the exam! He… he… he deliberately drank a glass of pure water before the exam, believing that only good-hearted people can use pure things, such a kind-hearted person, how could he cheat in the exam!”Thinking he had everything under control, the crown prince: ??Xu Yanmiao was deeply moved.[They’re all good people, even if their brains don’t work well, they’re trying their best to find reasons and excuses for me.] [But I really have no way to turn the tables, alas, it’s a pity that I haven’t finished watching the TV series I’ve been following. The old emperor angered the empress last night and got kicked out of the bedchamber, and now I’m going to die before seeing the ending. He seems to be planning to paint his face with ink and pretend to be a cat to cheer up the empress…]“Bang—”The old emperor slammed the table, forcibly interrupting the continuous stream of thoughts: “I believe Xu Yanmiao did not cheat in the exam! Release him, innocent!”The civil and military officials couldn’t wait to echo, fearing that if they were too slow, Xu Yanmiao might spill more gossip.“Yes yes yes! Release him innocent!”“Long live Your Majesty!”“Your Majesty, please end the court session! Let Xu Lang go home and rest! You’ve tired him out by making him stand for so long!”The crown prince: ??Did Xu Yanmiao drug them with hallucinogens or something?

Transmigrated to become a disciple of the demon sect, relying on the technique modifier to become a giant of the demon path.

[Detected the technique “Blood Nerve”, relying on devouring blood to cultivate]

[Side effect: easily affected by the spirit contained in the blood, becoming bloodthirsty, murderous, insane, and even brain dead]

[Please wait, system modification is in progress…]

[Ding! Modification completed and side effects canceled]

Aurora Waters was overwhelmed with despair when she faced the truth about her family.She had been born into a family of villains.Even worse, her family had an unhealthy obsession with faking their identities.They took “Fake it till you make it” so seriously that it usually ended with them getting killed!Her oldest brother pretended to be a CEO just to mess with the female lead, but that backfired when the male lead showed up and threw him out.Her second brother? He was an obsessive lover who pretended to be a wealthy second-generation heir—until the real heir ended his life.Her third sister? She faked being an heiress to manipulate the second male lead but ended up being killed by him.Her fourth sister? She faked an illness to attract the third male lead’s attention, only to die from a real one.Her mother? She put on a facade of being a kind and loving mom but ultimately met her end at the hands of the male lead.Her father? He pretended to be a powerful tycoon but lost his job and was drowned by the second male lead.And Aurora? She planned to impersonate the daughter of the richest man alive, but if things went the way they always did in her family, she’d probably meet her end by accidentally falling down the stairs.However, there was one glimmer of hope in this nightmare: she had a 100% rebate system that rewarded her for spending money on her family![Beep! You bought an eraser worth 1 dollar for your eldest brother! 2 dollars have been credited to your bank account!][Beep! You bought a candy worth 1 dollar for your second brother! 2 dollars have been credited to your bank account!]Aurora’s eyes sparkled as an idea took shape. She began spending on her family like crazy to rake in cash.She even wished her family were greedier so she could earn more! Just as she was brainstorming new ways to splurge on her family, she unexpectedly ran into her childhood crush.[Beep! You gave a bun worth 20 dollars to your childhood crush! 100 dollars has been credited to your bank account!]Aurora: …! That’s walking money!

After three years of struggling in the big city, Chu Zhishui finally managed to save enough money to buy a home. However, she discovered that she was the only human in her new workplace?Chu Zhishui: Are even supernatural creatures seeking stable jobs with iron rice bowls now?–In the office, Chu Zhishui gradually adapted to working at the supernatural bureau. Despite her diligence and dedication, she couldn’t escape the gossip and social niceties of a small town, facing the enthusiastic attention of the matchmaking department head.Supernatural Department Head: “Little Chu, you’re doing so well at work. Have you considered settling down and starting a family? Let me set you up with someone. Do you have any requirements?”Chu Zhishui silently recited the mantra of singlehood in her mind, but not wanting to dampen the mood, she decided to be deliberately demanding: “I don’t ask for much in a partner. Just someone good-looking, filial to my parents, capable of doing housework, and able to earn money to support the family…”The supernatural department head replied readily: “Great, I’ll find someone for you!”Chu Zhishui steeled herself and added with gritted teeth: “…and they must be able to bear children!”Just as she thought the department head would give up, the other party had a sudden realization: “The one in your office can bear children! Why don’t you just admit you like him?”Chu Zhishui: ???–Chu Zhishui: I thought I could slack off at my job in the supernatural bureau, but it turns out that was just wishful thinking.