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The question is so casual.

So clean.

I feel it like a slap.

No.

No.

That word is not on the tip of my tongue—it’s buried, buried deep beneath propriety, fear, and every lesson I’ve ever been taught about what a woman like me is allowed to want.

I don’t want to be her friend.

I don’t want cordial tea and garden pleasantries.

I want to understand why I can’t stop thinking about her.

...

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