Even Death Grew Tired of Killing Me-Chapter 51 - 46

We reached Solcarth at dawn.

Three and a half days since we left Hearthroot, and my body still hadn’t fully accepted the pace we kept. My legs moved fine, better than they ever had before, but the tiredness sat deeper than muscle. It was the kind that settled behind the eyes and stayed there, reminding me that even if my stats had gone up, I was still human in the ways that mattered.

My system flickered briefly as we passed under the outer markers.

Total Deaths: 284

I didn’t linger on the number. I had already told Kyren about it back on the road, and the look he gave me then had been... different. Thoughtful. Quiet. He hadn’t pushed, and I was grateful for that. Right now, I didn’t have the mental space to unpack anything beyond what was in front of me.

Kyren walked beside me, hands tucked into the sleeves of his Aetherian coat, gaze drifting lazily over the waking capital. He looked relaxed, almost amused, like the city was something familiar rather than intimidating. People moved around us in steady streams, merchants opening stalls, guards changing shifts, early travelers heading out while night workers faded into doorways.

Solcarth never really slept. It just changed rhythms.

We headed straight for my residence.

The inn wasn’t fancy, but it was clean, quiet enough, and most importantly, familiar. The manager recognized me immediately, his expression brightening with relief.

"Archivist Finley," he greeted, inclining his head. "You’re back sooner than expected."

"Things... moved faster than planned," I replied, managing a thin smile. "This is my brother. He’ll be staying with me."

Kyren lifted a hand in a casual wave. "Hi."

The manager blinked once, then nodded, already recalculating arrangements in his head. "Of course. You’ll be sharing your unit for now?"

"For the time being," I confirmed. "Until something larger opens up."

"That can be arranged."

As he turned to retrieve the registry tablet, he hesitated, then glanced back at me with a faint crease between his brows.

"There’s something else," he said carefully. "Someone from the palace came asking about your... assistant. The young girl."

My stomach tightened.

"When?" I asked.

"Several days ago. More than once."

"Did they say why?"

He shook his head. "No. They asked questions, polite enough, but persistent. I told them she was staying here, but that I didn’t know her schedule."

"And Astrae?" My voice sounded steadier than I felt. "Did she come back after that?"

The manager’s hesitation stretched just a bit too long.

"I haven’t seen her since shortly after you left the capital," he admitted. "I assumed she traveled with you."

I felt something cold settle in my chest.

"I need to see her room," I said.

He didn’t argue. After a brief pause, he reached under the counter and produced an extra key, its tag marked with a familiar room number.

"She’s been gone long enough that it shouldn’t be an issue," he said quietly. "I’ll accompany you if—"

"That’s not necessary," I replied. "Thank you."

Kyren followed without comment as we climbed the stairs.

The hallway was quiet, dustier than I remembered. That alone made my unease sharpen. When we reached Astrae’s door, I unlocked it slowly, half-expecting something to happen the moment it opened.

Nothing did.

The room was exactly as she left it.

Too exactly.

The bed was neatly made. The small table by the window held no dishes, no personal items. A faint layer of dust coated the floor near the corners and the windowsill. The air felt stale, untouched for days.

Then I saw it.

The letter.

The note I had slipped under the door before leaving for my world lay just inside the threshold, curled slightly at the edges, untouched. Unread. Exactly where I had left it.

My throat tightened.

I stepped inside and picked it up, turning it over as if that might somehow change what it meant. It didn’t. Astrae hadn’t been back. Not once.

Kyren stood quietly near the door, eyes moving over the room with sharp attention. He didn’t ask questions. He didn’t comment. That silence somehow made everything worse.

After a few minutes, I forced myself to move.

We returned the key to the manager.

"If she comes back," I told him, keeping my voice level, "please tell her not to leave. Tell her we’re looking for her."

He nodded immediately. "Of course."

By late afternoon, we had nothing.

I asked around discreetly. Shopkeepers. Street vendors. People who remembered Astrae as my quiet, young assistant. No one had seen her recently. No one remembered her leaving with luggage or companions. The answers were polite, apologetic, and useless.

Kyren stayed close the entire time, unusually quiet.

As the sun dipped lower, painting the stone streets in warm gold, we found ourselves near the palace district without consciously planning it. The towering walls rose ahead, imposing as ever, guards stationed with disciplined precision.

We were passing the outer stretch when my system reacted.

It wasn’t a notification. Not a message.

It was a pull.

A familiar tightening behind my eyes, like something tugged at the edges of my awareness.

Failure Converter stirred.

I slowed, then stopped altogether.

Kyren noticed instantly. "What is it?"

I didn’t answer right away. I focused inward, following the sensation, letting it resolve into something clearer.

"She’s here," I said quietly.

Kyren stiffened. "Here where?"

"Inside the palace grounds," I replied, turning slightly away from the walls. "My sub-skill reacted. Same pattern as before. Stronger."

His gaze shifted back to the palace, sharp and unreadable. "You’re sure?"

I nodded. "I wouldn’t mistake it."

We walked a few more steps before stopping again, putting distance between us and the gate. Kyren glanced back once more, then looked at me.

"So," he asked, voice calm, "what’s the plan?"

I exhaled slowly.

"That’s the problem," I admitted. "We can’t just walk in and demand answers. I don’t have that kind of authority. I don’t have the connections."

"And barging in would get us arrested," Kyren added flatly.

"Or worse," I muttered.

I rubbed a hand over my face, frustration building. Astrae wasn’t just missing. She was inside the most dangerous place in Solcarth, and whatever had taken her had done it quietly enough that no one was talking.

Which meant it was intentional.

And controlled.

My jaw tightened.

"She’s in trouble," I said. "Real trouble." 𝒻𝑟𝘦𝘦𝘸ℯ𝒷𝑛𝘰𝓋ℯ𝘭.𝘤𝘰𝘮

Kyren studied me for a long moment, then nodded once. "Yeah. I figured."

I looked at him sharply. "You’re awfully calm about this."

"I’m thinking," he replied. "Panicking won’t help her."

That earned him a weak huff of a laugh from me. "You’re really not acting your age."

He shrugged. "Someone has to."

We stood there as the sky darkened, palace lights beginning to glow faintly against the coming night. I felt helpless in a way I hadn’t since my earliest days in Aetherfall, before I learned how to survive, before I learned how to die and come back.

I hated it.

"I don’t know how to get her out," I admitted.

Kyren didn’t respond immediately. When he did, his voice was steady.

"Then we find a way," he said. "You’re not alone anymore, remember?"

I nodded, even though the knot in my chest didn’t ease.

Somewhere beyond those walls, Astrae was being held.

And whatever was happening to her, I had a sinking feeling that it wasn’t something I could afford to delay much longer.

~~~

We decided to eat first.

It felt wrong, almost irresponsible, knowing Astrae was somewhere inside the palace grounds and likely not there by choice. But my legs ached from the road, my head was still heavy from travel, and more importantly, Kyren was still a kid. A dangerous, sharp-tongued, absurdly capable kid, sure, but a kid nonetheless. We had just arrived back in Solcarth from Hearthroot, barely hours ago, and the first thing waiting for him in Aetherfall couldn’t be another crisis stacked on top of exhaustion.

So I dragged us into a small restaurant tucked between two larger shops, the kind that stayed open late for guards finishing their shifts and travelers who arrived after sundown. The smell of roasted meat and spiced broth hit me the moment we stepped inside, and only then did I realize how long it had been since I’d eaten something that wasn’t rationed or eaten on the move.

Kyren didn’t complain. He slid into the seat across from me, looking around with interest, eyes bright but calm, like he was cataloging everything without effort.

We ordered something warm and filling. By the time the bowls were set down in front of us, steam curling lazily into the dim air, I felt a fraction more human than I had an hour ago.

As I ate, my thoughts kept drifting back to Astrae.

Logically, there was no real reason for me to look for her.

She wasn’t my responsibility. We weren’t bound by blood, law, or obligation. We were together because of an agreement, because we were useful to each other. She needed someone who could read symbols and follow clues, and I needed someone powerful enough to keep me alive while I figured out what the hell was happening to my life.

That was all it was supposed to be.

Unlike Kyren.

Kyren was my responsibility now, whether I felt ready for it or not. Legally, practically, undeniably. Even if I barely knew him, even if we’d only spent a short time together, he was family in the only way that mattered. My parents had chosen him. Out of all the kids they could have adopted, they chose Kyren, and I trusted them enough to believe they saw something in him worth protecting.

Something worth betting their future on.

I glanced across the table at him. He was eating with an easy rhythm, relaxed, unbothered, like this was just another night out. If not for everything I knew, he would have looked like a normal kid enjoying a late meal with his older brother.

Astrae was nothing like that.

Behind her young appearance was something ancient. Old enough that numbers stopped to mean anything. She carried herself with pride, with certainty, with the quiet confidence of someone who had survived things I couldn’t even imagine. I had warned her more than once to be careful. Told her that Solcarth was dangerous, that the palace was not a place to wander freely, that gods weren’t as untouchable as they liked to believe.

She had brushed it off every time.

She trusted her power. Trusted the idea that being a god meant safety.

And now she was missing.

I set my spoon down, appetite fading.

I could walk away.

The thought came unbidden, sharp and uncomfortable. I could leave Solcarth, follow other leads, chase my original goal. Find a major god, someone strong enough to undo what happened to my parents, someone who could give me answers instead of more questions.

Nothing in my agreement with Astrae said I had to save her.

But the thought of doing nothing sat wrong in my chest.

Somewhere along the road, between Hearthroot and Solcarth, between shared meals and silent walks and nights spent watching the fire die down, Astrae had stopped being just a tool or a deal. She had become... something else. A companion. A presence. Someone I trusted to walk ahead of me without question.

Maybe even a friend.

And my conscience wouldn’t let me pretend otherwise.

"Hey," Kyren uttered suddenly, pulling me out of my spiral. "You’ve been staring at your food for a while now."

I blinked and looked up at him.

"What’s the plan?" he asked, voice casual but eyes sharp.

I hesitated.

It was already well past midnight, and the restaurant staff had started cleaning around us, chairs being stacked in quiet signals that closing time was near. Outside, the streets had thinned, lantern light pooling on stone instead of crowds.

Kyren leaned back slightly. "You really don’t know anyone who can help us get past the palace gates without turning it into a mess?"

I really thought about it.

Edrin. Tomas. Lyra.

All of them were capable. All of them had helped me before. And all of them were sworn to the kingdom, to the palace, to the very system that Astrae was now trapped inside. Asking them would mean dragging them into something that went against their duty, maybe even forcing them to choose.

I couldn’t do that.

"There’s... someone," I admitted slowly.

Kyren raised an eyebrow. "But?"

I exhaled. "I’ve been asking too much of of them lately. They’ve already helped me more than they should have. I haven’t done anything to repay that."

Kyren shrugged, like the answer was obvious. "It’s not like we have a lot of choices right now."

I frowned at my bowl, then let out a quiet sigh.

"You’re right," I murmured. "There really isn’t."

I paused, weighing the words before continuing. "Okay. Let’s go. I guess it’s about time you meet her too."

Kyren tilted his head slightly. "Her?"

I nodded.

"She and her team helped me cross the expanse the first time," I said. "No questions. No hesitation. Me being here, still alive, still moving forward... a lot of that is because of her."

Kyren watched me for a moment, then a small, knowing smile tugged at the corner of his mouth.

"Sounds important," he replied.

"Yeah," I said quietly. "She is."

I stood, leaving a few coins on the table, and Kyren followed without another word. As we stepped back into the cool night air of Solcarth, my unease didn’t fade, but it sharpened into something more focused.

If Astrae was in trouble, then standing still wasn’t an option anymore.

Even if it meant asking for help I wasn’t sure I deserved.