Help! I Became A Guy In A BL Novel!-Chapter 89: The Other Side

"Only if you tell me why you left me twice..." Riven responded. He needed to know. Without that knowledge, he wouldn’t be able to let go of the gnawing pain that kept clawing at his heart. He knew that he was insecure because he was simply a transmigrator... Not his original mate. So he needed to know Ronan’s reasoning.

Riven kind of knew why. It was the same reason why the Riven in the story died. Ronan viewed his mate as a weakness. Something that could be used against him, someone who would make him more vulnerable.

He believed that attachments were a flaw and love was something that could make him weak. Riven knew all of this, but still...

Ronan, after seeing how disgusting his father and the alphas before him behaved, he felt the need to prove himself to be the best leader, no distractions... That all changed when he met Eli, of course. He melted that frozen heart.

He still wanted to hear it from Ronan’s mouth. Was that the reason? Or was there another reason? Based on the answer Ronan gives, he would decide what to do.

Ronan froze, his hands resting on Riven’s thighs as he struggled to find the right words.

"I-" Ronan started to speak, "I wanted to be the perfect leader, someone who is not distracted by something like this. I had to undo a lot of damage done by my predecessors, and I feared that I would turn out like them. Irrational, selfish and greedy."

His icy blue eyes, which were always cold, showed cracks, a hint of vulnerability.

"Am I not a distraction anymore then? What if I was not your mate? What if the elders try to kill me because I am a guy?" Riven said softly, he met Ronan’s gaze with uncertainty.

"I did not know you were my mate when I started to like you. Let me be selfish for once and not think of myself as an Alpha, but as a man. I tried my best to be the perfect Alpha, but everything is meaningless without you. And if anyone tries to lay their hands on you, I will kill them before they have a chance."

Ronan held Riven’s hands in his own and whispered into them, "You are not my weakness, you are my strength."

The intensity of his words made Riven freeze, his breath caught in his throat. For a moment, he couldn’t believe how genuine and passionate Ronan’s words were. There was no hesitation, no regret. Just fierce, unyielding determination to protect him, no matter the cost.

Something in Riven’s heart cracked, and he reached forward, grabbing Ronan by the collar and yanking him upward. Since Ronan was still kneeling, Riven towered over him in that moment, looking almost dominant as he stared him down. Ronan’s eyes widened slightly, but he didn’t resist.

"Then prove it," Riven whispered, his lips almost brushing against Ronan’s. "Prove that you won’t leave me again. Prove that I’m not just some inconvenience."

Ronan didn’t need to be told twice. He surged forward, capturing Riven’s lips in a kiss that was both desperate and gentle, as if pouring every ounce of his regret and longing into that one embrace.

Riven couldn’t help but respond, his hands threading into Ronan’s hair, tugging him closer. He hated how easily his body melted into the kiss, but he couldn’t deny the way his heart pounded against his ribs.

When Riven finally pulled away, he pressed his forehead against Ronan’s, both of them panting softly. "You may," Riven whispered, giving him the faintest of permissions.

Something in Ronan’s gaze ignited—a mix of relief and hunger. He didn’t waste any time, gently pushing Riven back onto the bed and climbing over him, his kisses growing deeper and more passionate. Riven couldn’t help but respond, caught up in the overwhelming sensations and the feeling of being wanted.

But when Ronan’s lips moved to his neck, he suddenly froze, his eyes narrowing as he inhaled deeply. A dark expression crossed his face, and his hands clenched slightly.

"What... Is this?" Ronan whispered, his voice tinged with barely contained fury. He brushed his fingers over a faint mark on Riven’s scent gland—a mark that wasn’t his. "Did Soren do this?" His voice came out shaky and hoarse, like he was shaking with anger.

Riven felt his muscles tense, and he glared at Ronan, annoyance flaring up. "Yes," he replied sharply, his tone defensive. He didn’t want to deal with Ronan’s possessiveness right now, especially when things were just starting to feel right.

Ronan’s jaw clenched, and his hands tightened on the sheets. His heart ached at the thought of someone else marking his mate, but he forced himself to calm down. As much as it stung, he couldn’t afford to push Riven away by letting his jealousy take over. Not when he’d just barely managed to earn a sliver of Riven’s trust back.

He swallowed down his possessiveness and brushed his thumb over the mark as if trying to wipe it away. "It doesn’t matter," he said, his voice quieter and more composed. "I will mark you and make sure everyone knows that you are my mate."

Riven raised an eyebrow, slightly surprised by Ronan’s restraint. He had expected the alpha to lash out, to demand answers or make a scene. But Ronan was holding himself back, forcing himself to remain calm and reasonable, even though his scent was tinged with barely suppressed anger.

Riven couldn’t help but smirk faintly, a small part of him satisfied by Ronan’s effort to stay rational despite his rut. Maybe... Just maybe, this was a sign that Ronan was changing. That he was willing to fight for him without letting his pride or instincts take over.

His hand moved to rest against Ronan’s cheek, brushing his thumb over his skin softly. "How about on the other side?" He wanted to keep Soren’s mark.

He felt the tension thrumming just beneath Ronan’s skin, the alpha practically vibrating with the effort to hold back his instincts. Still, Riven stood by what he said.