I Can Hear the Heart's Voice of Traditional Chinese Medicine-Chapter 435 - 180: A Path Leading Oneself into the Abyss

Fan Qiyun hung up the phone, her chest still heaving with anger.

It wasn’t until she calmed down that she noticed a message from the department head on WeChat, asking her to call back if she was free. She immediately dialed the head of the department: "Director, what’s up?"

"Why didn’t you come in today?"

Fan Qiyun slapped her forehead: "Look at me, I forgot to tell you. The dean forced me to take leave. I was going to inform you, but I forgot because of some issues."

"What, family issues?"

"Director, how did you know?" Fan Qiyun’s tone was surprised.

Although almost everyone in the hospital knew about her situation, she’d only briefly mentioned her recent troubles to Dean Zhang Jiwei in the morning, so others should not have known.

That the director mentioned this directly was a shock to Fan Qiyun.

"How do I know? Your dad called me here. How could I not know?" the director said irritably.

"These people..."

Fan Qiyun felt a wave of helplessness. She wasn’t sure when her parents got her department head’s phone number. They hadn’t called before, but after she turned off her phone, she was shocked that they shamelessly called her department head.

"You might as well block them. There’s also the landline. It’d be best to ask the office to change it, otherwise, they’ll keep bothering you."

The director caught the hint: "What, your parents are asking you for money again?"

"It’s not just asking for money; they’re asking for my life."

Fan Qiyun had never complained about her family like this before. Her deep resentment this time surprised the head of the respiratory department, Ma Xiaoyi.

In his eyes, Fan Qiyun was akin to the particularly suffering characters in TV dramas, struggling without getting what she wanted, veering further down the wrong path.

To Fan Qiyun, her family wasn’t a source of happiness; it was a burden. As he had discussed with the dean before, Fan Qiyun ended up where she was largely because she couldn’t detach from her family’s dependency. She increasingly sacrificed herself for it.

The original family left Fan Qiyun with not only hurt but also a distorted value system—the idea that only through sacrifice could she earn recognition, otherwise, she was nothing.

She couldn’t compare to the precious son, nor to others’ daughters; life, marriage, and whatever didn’t matter. The important thing was to contribute to saving the family.

In this stifling family, Fan Qiyun slowly lost herself, hating her family yet deeply loving them, like a swamp slowly engulfing her.

Sometimes, looking at Fan Qiyun, Ma Xiaoyi, as her leader, felt both sympathy and speechlessness.

Especially hearing Fan Qiyun frequently utter that line, "Mom, I don’t blame you for being biased," Ma Xiaoyi felt like a thunderbolt struck his heart. He had said the same to his parents back in high school; only when one truly feels the bias can one pretend to be magnanimous and say such words.

In reality, Ma Xiaoyi could sense how desperate Fan Qiyun felt deep inside when she uttered these words. Over time, the scars in his heart healed by his current family.

But not for Fan Qiyun. Not only did they not heal, but the persecution against her continued relentlessly.

Unending, with increasing intensity.

"I don’t blame you"—a phrase we often use in life. Lent something to a friend, it got lost, it’s okay, I don’t blame you.

A lover betrayed you, it’s okay, I don’t blame you. Backstabbed by a friend, it’s okay, I don’t blame you.

We just can’t bring ourselves to say harsh words like "Screw you," always trying to appear easy-going, downplaying things, but it often cuts deep inside.

In Fan Qiyun, Ma Xiaoyi saw the past him.

But Fan Qiyun was pitiful.

Feeling sympathy yet also thinking sometimes Fan Qiyun was digging her own grave. She could have chosen the life she wanted but chose a path that seemed happy yet was all mud, without end in sight, only to end up in an abyss.

However, Ma Xiaoyi knew he wasn’t in a position to say anything about Fan Qiyun.

He had been the same.

It’s just that with his parents’ passing, the pain became a forgotten Chapter.

Yet, as a colleague and leader, Ma Xiaoyi couldn’t help but show concern: "Hearing you complain, honestly, I’m quite glad for you. At least you’re starting to change."

"Director, do you know what they asked of me today?"

Ma Xiaoyi didn’t speak, preparing to be a good listener.

"My brother is getting married. My mom actually asked me to pay for the dowry and the house. Without money for a house, she asked me to give up my house so my brother could live there. When I only have a few thousand in savings, she could say something so cold-blooded. A stranger would probably be warmer. It’s the first time I realized that, in their eyes, I’m no family, just an ATM."

Talking about being an ATM, Fan Qiyun gave a self-mocking smile: "Now that the ATM has run dry, I’ve become the black sheep, a cold-blooded creature, the person they despise the most."