I Want to Be a VTuber-Chapter 310: Polaris (2)

When Seoyeon first saw the script for Mine, one thing stood out to her.

The protagonist of this drama, Jin Yeonseo, was an incredibly weak character.

"Why do you look at me like that?"

In truth, Jin Yeonseo didn’t want to be out in the world.

She was afraid of people and hated seeing new things.

"You've searched for me all this time."

In her life, she had never made a decision for herself.

Everything was someone else’s choice.

Her life had been one where she was tossed around by others.

Her powerful psychic abilities.

A new life.

She didn’t wish for anything.

"So I came. To meet you."

A trembling voice.

Throughout the story, Jin Yeonseo always seemed composed.

Those watching the drama might be mistaken about who Jin Yeonseo was.

From the start of the drama until now, Jin Yeonseo never appeared flustered.

No matter what situation she faced, she adapted easily.

But it wasn’t because she was special.

Jin Yeonseo was a coward.

Seoyeon couldn’t help but see that clearly.

And that’s why she could become so evil and cruel.

That’s why Seoyeon hated Jin Yeonseo.

She was learning emotions in the world.

She wanted to learn, but she had to.

"I know."

Seoyeon knew.

Learning something new was frightening.

What would change by learning this?

Seoyeon had felt the same way.

When her mother had told her to learn emotions and act like an ordinary person,

Seoyeon had obediently followed, but still, she couldn’t help but question it.

"What will change by doing this?"

Her disability wouldn’t disappear.

Even if she mimicked other people’s emotions, she couldn’t truly understand them.

For the most part, just seeing herself smile would make others uncomfortable.

"Yeah, you can do it. You’re special. The doctor said so."

She thought she was lucky.

Seoyeon could do things others couldn’t.

Some believed that her condition had been cured.

Even doctors who knew it was incurable.

"Emotional expression disorder isn’t like being a psychopath. Most people wouldn’t even notice that your son doesn’t truly perceive emotions unless they engage in deep conversation with him."

Emotional expression disorder meant it took a long time to recognize emotions when they were felt or sometimes not at all.

Seoyeon fell into the latter category.

Still, she could perfectly mimic other people's emotions.

Her mother thought she was special because of this.

So did the doctor.

But Seoyeon knew.

Even so, there was an unbridgeable gap between her and them.

"Why are you looking at me like that?"

Jin Yeonseo was different from ordinary people.

She was born a psychic.

She was created to never stand on the same level as others.

Understanding and empathy.

Beautiful words, but Seoyeon knew they were difficult.

Jin Yeonseo could not connect with others.

People were afraid of her.

And because she was afraid of people,

the gap would never close, just like with her past self.

"Shouldn’t you be doing this to me?"

With a trembling voice, Jin Yeonseo twisted her lips into a smile.

Her usual smile.

But the researchers looking at her only stared at her with terrified faces.

As though they knew exactly what she might do next.

"J-Jin Yeonseo. Please listen to us. We didn’t mean any harm. We just wanted to talk."

"Talk? We can do that right now."

"Well, how can we speak when you’re looking at us like that?"

One of the researchers, who had watched her since she was a child, cautiously spoke up.

In his eyes, the deep rage flickering in her red pupils was visible.

A deep rage she herself hadn’t recognized.

Yeonseo had come into the world and learned emotions.

She had learned a lot, but no one had taught her about anger.

No one had told her.

"Unpleasant emotions."

Seoyeon had come to understand that emotion.

Anger was unpleasant.

Seoyeon had experienced many emotions since her rebirth,

and not all of them were pleasant.

Anger was one of them.

Seoyeon hadn’t realized she could get angry.

She didn’t know what to be angry about.

But as she lived, there were times when she got angry.

Even in small, everyday situations.

For example, when playing games, when her father teased her, or when she failed a test.

In those ordinary moments.

But Jin Yeonseo’s anger was different from those trivial moments of anger.

Suddenly, Seoyeon remembered what had happened at ShineMoon not too long ago.

Pyo Jiwoo, glaring as though she was about to kill Low.

A deep rage toward the other person.

That anger was so frightening that even Seoyeon had flinched.

"But no."

Jin Yeonseo’s anger didn’t carry murderous intent toward others.

Her anger came from sadness and pity.

From injustice, frustration, and fear.

What Seoyeon understood were the latter two.

When Sim Cheongseok was hurt, Seoyeon felt a deep anger.

That’s why she rushed to ShineMoon.

Anger dulls reason.

Though it was an unfamiliar emotion, and she hadn’t dealt with it properly,

thanks to Pyo Jiwoo, she could calm down and think clearly.

If it hadn’t been for her... Seoyeon might have made a mistake.

Anger was that scary and terrifying.

Seoyeon realized that not being able to control yourself was a frightening thing.

And Jin Yeonseo had always lived with that fear.

Knowing this, Seoyeon no longer hated Jin Yeonseo as much.

Now, for the first time, she could reach her heart.

"I came to make a decision today."

Jin Yeonseo’s quiet voice.

With a sigh mixed in, the researchers trembled.

It was so natural.

It wasn’t acting.

The emotions in her voice were too intense.

Method acting.

Director Han Yegen leaned forward in his chair.

From the start, he felt something was different.

She had only shown this kind of acting once before.

In The Chaser, as Cha Seoa.

In Kyungsung Lady, as Kasugayama Yuina, she had come close, but there was a slight difference.

"No, can this be called method acting?"

It wasn’t just simple method acting.

So, was it some other form of acting?

He didn’t know.

This was Seoyeon’s unique acting style.

Only she could understand it, only she could perform it.

If he said it, someone would call it nonsense.

But, what could he do? It was real.

Just like a certain actress had once shone brightly, now Seoyeon was the same.

If she was a radiant star before, Seoyeon was like the blazing sun now.

She could shine intensely or become a gentle sunset.

She always shines.

A truly special person.

A real star with the brilliance of a star.

Han Yegen looked around at the green-screened world.

Even without CGI, he could see it in his eyes.

The old research facility on a deserted island.

And the little psychic girl, crying and smiling.

"Which side will be able to accept me?"

The world and the world she was born into.

To some, it might be just a small research facility, but to Jin Yeonseo, it was everything.

Her small playroom.

The horrific laboratory where she had suffered.

It was all her world.

Adam had said.

The world would shine.

And if she went out into the world, she could do many things.

Perhaps, that might be true.

But Yeonseo was scared.

"Between this small research facility and the world."

Dragged into the world against her will, Jin Yeonseo was still afraid to choose it.

Sure, the world was vast, and there were many things she could do, but how could she know if she could actually do them?

She was different from countless others.

She didn’t know how others would perceive or accept her.

The research facility was a terrible place, but there were others like her there.

Maybe there, she could find someone who could empathize with her.

If she left, and someone similar to her was born—

If someone was created, perhaps she could live together, empathizing with each other.

In that way, Jin Yeonseo was a coward, a weak girl.

"Th-that..."

The researcher hesitated.

Feeling that small hesitation, Jin Yeonseo calmly closed her eyes.

The smile she had been wearing faded.

She knew.

This was not the place.

"Is Adam here?"

In a quieter voice, Yeonseo asked.

The researchers didn’t notice the change.

"Ah, Adam? He... he died a long time ago..."

"You must have heard that he’s still alive."

She had heard it from the psychic who had been posing as her friend, Shin Arin.

"Adam will come here."

"How do you know that?"

"Because he knows me."

Adam knew her personality.

He had been the one to make this choice for her.

"And he must have known it would end up like this."

He had made her face things she didn’t want to see.

He made her choose by showing her the things she wanted to forget.

"I told you. I came here to make a choice."

Holding the red fire axe in her hand, Yeonseo took a step [N O V E L I G H T] forward.

"I was going to decide between ordinary people and psychics. I hoped to be the latter."

Even if the memories were terrible,

If there were people here who could empathize with her, that would be enough.

"The latter is just one. The former has to die a lot."

Her trembling voice settled, steady and low.

It was heavy.

The fiery glow in her eyes cooled, replaced with a quiet, lethal calm.

It was a killing intent.

Only the will to kill her target reflected in her eyes.

"But it seems like you don’t want the latter."

If they hadn’t rejected her, Yeonseo was ready to kill one person.

A short time.

But she had been a pretty ordinary girl.

The daughter of her stepfather, Park Hoonmin—Park Yeonseo.

But they rejected her and even rejected the fact that she was a psychic.

To be exact, they feared her.

What kind of understanding or empathy could she expect from those who feared her?

"I didn’t want it to be like this."

If her stepfather’s daughter disappeared, he would grieve, but she thought it would be better for him in the long run.

She was certain that trouble would come to him because of her.

But, as always, the world didn’t go her way.

"What, what are you planning to do?"

"Wait, wait a moment. Yeonseo, let’s talk."

Only then did the researchers, noticing the change in her demeanor, start speaking.

They exchanged glances, searching for ways to stop her.

Among the psychics currently in the research facility,

who had the power to stop her?

Reading their eyes, Yeonseo’s eyes grew colder.

Deep into the darkness.

"The latter would end with one girl dying."

An ordinary girl, Park Yeonseo, just one.

But—

"The former... yes. Many would die. Really many."

Even if she acted like a perfectly ordinary girl, as long as there were people who knew she was a psychic, her surroundings would constantly be in danger.

Knowing that, Jin Yeonseo couldn’t easily open her heart.

Just recently, a girl who had opened her heart—

‘Hong Seha’—had been gravely hurt because of her.

If she had been just a little late, she might have lost her life to Adam.

So, she had to make a choice.

"To become an ordinary person, I’ll have to kill everyone who knows about Jin Yeonseo."

Anyone who knew about her being a psychic.

If she killed them all, then she could finally step into the world.

Jin Yeonseo, the psychic, would vanish, and only Park Yeonseo, the ordinary girl, would remain.

"Y-You’re insane. How many people do you plan to kill?! And you still call yourself human?!"

"What are you talking about?"

Yeonseo stopped in her tracks.

And then—

"You made me a non-human being, not me."

Yeonseo smiled softly.

A smile so beautiful it could take one’s breath away.

It was like the smile a devil wears before taking a person’s soul.

Yes, a devil.

A devil that looked human.

A Majin (demon-human).

They could feel it.

They had created an irreversible monster.

Heh.

In that moment, the eyes of the actors, who were watching Yeonseo—Seoyeon—trembled.

It was the same as before.

Just like when she had first acted as Jin Yeonseo, who didn’t understand emotions.

Her acting conveyed that she was a being unlike humans.

A girl who looked almost like a human, but wasn’t.

The fear from that place swallowed the actors.

"Arthur."

Oliver, seeing that performance, turned to Arthur, who was watching it intently.

"Today, it’s a truly monstrous performance."

"Yeah."

"Are you okay? It feels like I’m watching the original monster. It’s unsettling. I’ve only seen this kind of acting once."

The original monster.

It didn’t need to be said who Oliver was referring to.

Nor what kind of performance he was talking about.

Stella Baldwin.

The performance that won her the Best Actress award at the Berlin Film Festival.

Oliver recalled Stella’s passionate acting back then.

Now, Stella was a bit calmer.

She had achieved so much at that age.

But back then, she was different.

She acted with her whole being, as if it was all she had.

And the result had been the Berlin Film Festival Best Actress award.

Now, Seoyeon’s performance, riding on the current momentum, was similar.

Something was different.

Something else was there.

A talent that ordinary people could never catch, no matter how hard they tried.

Acting that moved other people’s emotions.

"Oliver."

"Hmm?"

"Opportunities are really laughable."

Arthur adjusted his white coat.

The same white coat he had worn when he first met young Yeonseo.

A drama from this small country.

He had never thought it could become sincere.

But Child’s Game.

A drama from this small country that had created a small revolution.

That drama had stirred up strong currents.

And made the eyes of the world turn to this small country.

Mine.

A drama fully ready to ride that current.

If it was properly completed, Arthur believed it was entirely possible.

"...It really comes from an unexpected place."

A work capable of hitting Stella back.

And an opportunity to make the world recognize him again.