Married To The Enemy Kingdom's Illegitimate Prince-Chapter 120 — You Discarded My Feelings

A few days had passed since the group of soldiers, along with the Grand Duke and Duchess, had been camping at the border, overseeing the land in an attempt to trace demons.

The moon shone brightly, casting a dim light over the dark forest, while a fire burned to keep the young man standing before it warm against the night’s cold.

Wrapping his coat around himself, Lucian drew his sword from its sheath. He swung the blade a few times before returning it to its place.

"Have you been practicing this late into the night, Your Highness?"

Hearing Cynthia’s soft, low voice, Lucian turned to face her.

Draped with a thick dark blanket, she stepped closer, her long hair blown by the cold breeze.

A dry laugh escaped his lips as he caught his breath from the sword practice.

Wasn’t she the one who had been acting cold toward him just a few days ago? Why the sudden shift? He could never wrap his mind around her actions, growing more confused each time he thought about her.

"Is there something you need from me?" he demanded, his voice icy, reminiscent of the early months of their marriage.

Cynthia lowered her gaze for a moment before speaking.

"I believe this is a trap," she began. "We have been here for days without any sign of demons. It seems they have already left; we should return as well."

"Are you suggesting the king has lied to me?" Lucian retorted, a sneer forming as he locked his gaze onto hers, stepping closer to the shorter woman.

Instinctively, Cynthia stepped back, her thoughts overwhelmed by his sudden intensity. His demeanor had shifted entirely in an instant, leaving her no time to process.

Before she realized it, her back collided with a large tree trunk. She blinked rapidly, realizing Lucian had slammed his palms against the tree behind her, pinning her in place, as if to ensure she could not escape him.

Her pulse quickened in panic.

"W-What is it?" She asked, her voice unsteady for once.

"You seem nervous," Lucian’s voice carried a hint of amusement seeing her anxious due to his unexpected actions.

"I am not," Cynthia retorted, regaining her composure.

She tried to push his hands away, but he didn’t budge. He was physically much stronger compared to her.

"Do answer a question that has been preoccupying my mind for a while, Your Highness. Why did you decide to take care of my duties when I was grieving? I believe it wouldn’t matter to you, right? After all, you simply pretend to care. Do you think I am a fool, who believes all your acts were sincere?"

Cynthia narrowed her eyes, wondering if he were truly clueless of the reason or if he merely pretended to be.

Anyone could tell the reason behind her action, but his suspicion was all the more valid. She knew he wasn’t completely fooled but she wished he kept acting like he didn’t know. She clenched her jaw, refusing to support his silly interrogation.

Lucian gave her nod, waiting for her response. He guessed her answer but as unpredictable as she was, constantly switching her attitude, he needed to make sure he wasn’t imagining what she did for him.

Sensing he wouldn’t let her go until she spoke, she began, "You... You needed time to overcome your loss," she hesitated.

It wasn’t completely a lie, but it was also a calculated move to assert some power over the duchy to gain more trust from the grand duke’s loyal servants, such as Dylan, who constantly doubted her.

"Losing a loved one hurts," she continued.

"You seem to know of the pain," Lucian remarked, leaning closer to her face.

His gaze wavered for a moment. He would usually never lock gaze with her for a long duration. However, this time, he simply couldn’t take his eyes off her.

The moonlight reflecting on her pale skin, her lips and her violet eyes shining like jewels refrained him from doing so.

Perhaps, the very reason he always avoided looking at her for too long was how she looked like an angel. Yet, his whole body sensed the evil in her which might bewitch him.

Yet, he didn’t loathe the idea of it for once.

Even if she was evil, he knew she wouldn’t hurt him. He had witnessed it, and that alone calmed the anxious feeling rising inside his veins. Maybe she would hurt others for him.

The thought only made his lips twist into a smirk of satisfaction.

A person who would hurt others for ’me’...

He mused.

Cynthia looked at him, her brow arched, trying to uncover his thoughts and the reason behind his smirk.

Parting his lips, he began, "You said you love me, right?" He whispered, his hand gently brushing against her cheek. His gaze softened unlike just a few moments ago when he spoke to her harshly, his eyes reflecting anger.

Cynthia’s body stiffened, feeling the cold sensation on her skin, unable to recall having said such words.

Then, she let out a soft gasp, the flashback of what happened in Eldoria running through her mind. He had rejected her, and with Princess Arisia’s death and all the following events, she had completely forgotten about it.

"A-Are you feeling better?" Cynthia stammered, gently shaking his hand away from her.

She had no answer to that question. The lie she told him in desperation seemed to have returned to haunt her, sending chills down her spine. A knot formed in her stomach, making her feel the turmoil of feelings inside her— confusion, anxiety and fear that her lies would her caught.

"A part of me will forever miss her," his voice low, he retreated his hands, setting her free to leave if she wished.

It wasn’t like him to try and force someone to stay by his side. Clenching his fists, he tried to control the thrill overwhelming him at the thought that for once, someone loved him, and didn’t hate him.

Cynthia bit his lips, looking at his dropped expression. She shouldn’t have brought up Princess Arisia, someone she knew was close to his heart to avoid his questions.

"I could never become the brother she saw in me. I constantly... failed her. Be it a decade ago, or a decade later. I remained the same loser who couldn’t give her anything. I left her, in the hope she would forget me but... she came back into my life and I still couldn’t protect her!" Lucian’s breath ragged between his words, a turmoil of rage surging within him. "But this time, I truly lost her!" He huffed, striking a strong punch against the tree trunk behind Cynthia.

The quick fist thrown her way whipped Cynthia’s hair across her face, but she didn’t budge. She remained composed, staring at him in a state she had never seen before—a messy Lucian.

Although his story might bring any woman to tears, Cynthia couldn’t squeeze a single tear from her eyes.

She gently reached for his bleeding fist, pulling him toward her tent without saying a word.

Her mind raced, trying to come up with words, but no matter how much she might have practiced, Lucian could still see through her true feelings—which, in truth, were absent behind her every action.

She made him sit on a chair and began rummaging through her bag, searching for a cloth to cover his wounds.

Unable to find so, a thought crossed her mind. It was a perfect moment to utilize her divine– healing powers and see if everything she had been hearing lately– about her being a saintess was true.

Sitting beside Lucian, she closed her eyes, concentrating on the sole thought of healing him.

Noticing a golden flicker of light projected on his face, Lucian narrowed his eyes, perplexed. His gaze dropped on his hands, noticing his injuries began to disappear.

His eyes widened, and he blinked at Cynthia, who kept her eyes closed.

"What—"

"Ah! You are healed!? It worked?!" She exclaimed, surprised by her own powers. She didn’t expect it to work; however, her heart raced, discovering a new power.

Then am I actually a saintess? Just as brother Vincent and that woman told me?

"How did you do this? I don’t recall you saying you mastered healing spells. Did you—" Lucian halted, shocked by his own thoughts. Just when he had decided to give her a chance, he began doubting her.

Cynthia kept a composed voice and parted her lips.

"It seems you still have trouble trusting me, Your Highness. I simply wanted to try and see if it would work. To my surprise, whether you believe it or not, it did."

"I-I apologize... I did not mean to doubt you..." Lucian pressed the palm on his hand against his face, tired of everything.

Why is everything so complicated when it comes to her? I would rather fight on the battlefield... At least I would know who my enemies were and who my allies were.

"It’s alright," Cynthia removed her hands from his.

Her heartbeat returned to its normal state, no longer shaken by his kind apology, which before would falter her.

"I meant what I said that day but you rejected me, Your Highness. You simply discarded my feelings. So why are you suddenly recalling those words?" Cynthia’s tone remained cold and distant.

Did I hurt her?..

Lucian wondered, unable to speak a word.

"We should sleep and return to the mansion tomorrow," Cynthia finally said, giving up the thought of any explanation from Lucian.

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