My Alleged Husband-Chapter 873 - 819: Are You Kidding Me?
Xia Jing suddenly feels that Zhang Zhentian is really funny now, telling himself over and over again that everything from the past is unchangeable.
"Zhang Zhentian, don’t you think you’re being really childish? Have you ever considered how you managed to say those words? Time and again, have you searched your heart to see how often you’ve done this, have you really forgotten it all? Even if you’ve forgotten everything, I haven’t—I still remember it all very clearly!"
You must be curious why I still remember these things. It’s because I want you to know, some things cannot just be forgotten when you say so. The hurt you’ve caused me, I will always remember, no matter how much love there once was between us.
At the moment I heard you wanted to commit suicide for me, I still felt embarrassed and lucky, thinking you wouldn’t go that far for me. Even if you truly loved me, you still have your own family, your parents, and your own responsibilities. Even considering everyone’s feelings, you would think twice before proceeding. But I didn’t expect you to be so impulsive, so casually thinking about suicide. Do you think that’s fair to your family, who love you so genuinely and regard you as their most important person?
All of you always think I’m the one in control, but now tell me, who is truly selfish, who has no bottom line? Aren’t you the one threatening everyone repeatedly? In the end, who gets hurt? It’s always one’s own family.
If you really have come to understand, then please take responsibility for every word you’ve said, and don’t always think that your father will stand there, taking no responsibility. In a single moment, you’ve made your father raise his voice to you—your own biological father. How can you bear to commit suicide in front of him? How must it feel in the depth of a father’s heart to see this? How distressed and helpless must he feel?"
After hearing Xia Jing’s words, Zhang Zhentian turned his head to look at Old Master Zhang and chose to say nothing, shaking his head at his son. Zhang Zhentian knew then that his father was truly disappointed in him this time.
"I really didn’t think you could be so foolish. I thought that even though you hadn’t lived in this house for many years, you at least understood the value of life. But you treat your own life so carelessly.
During that phase of your actions, I began to doubt, are you truly my son? Why would my son be so foolish? A child values their life so much, but why were you so foolish? I can hardly believe you are the same person. Can you tell me where my original son has gone?
Actually, that question is redundant. You and the son I speak of are really no different, because both of you would stop at nothing for your wives, exhaust all your efforts and completely disregard the immense pain your family endures. All you ever want is the woman in your eyes, surely forgetting your own family. Do you understand the excruciating pain of watching your son die beside you?
People are indeed selfish, as the saying goes ’every man for himself, and the devil take the hindmost.’ But to be selfish to the extent that you are, it is really exceedingly rare!
I don’t know what benefits you get from being so selfish—time and again you disregard your relatives, again and again treating them like playthings—taking when you want, discarding when you wish, harming when you feel like it. In your eyes, relatives are so trivial and inconsequential, but when you want something from them, when they can be of help to you, you choose to come back to your lovers. What do your lovers mean in your eyes?
In that instant, I could hardly believe you were my son. How could my son be like this? Even if my son is irresponsible to me as a father, he would never go to this extent. In the sight of his own father, to still choose to hang himself, aren’t you driving your father to a dead end?"
It is only now that Zhang Zhentian remembers, his recent actions were taken in front of his own father. He realizes his father was really afraid, too afraid of losing his son. What has he made his father out to be? He never considered how much his father could emotionally endure, only blindly pursuing what he wanted without sparing a thought for what his family really wished for.
"Dad, I’m sorry, I wasn’t considerate enough just now; I acted without thinking and caused you worry. I now understand that all these years, despite my absence from your side, you still cared for me so much. This is truly an overwhelming surprise for me. I could never have imagined that upon returning home, my father would still care about whether I live or die. I thought that from the day I left home, you all chose to abandon me, but to now receive such a reaction, how can I not be surprised and astonished?"
"We’ve already said that no matter the bad things you’ve done, the number of days you’ve strayed, or the number of people you’ve killed, in our eyes we will always be your parents and you will always be our son. No matter how many mistakes you make, we will endlessly forgive you, because the mistakes you have made only prove that we did not guide you correctly and did not fulfill our responsibilities as parents. All the blame should not fall on you alone, all the suffering should not be endured alone; we, as parents, should share the burden. But at that moment, I was really afraid—I also thought I shouldn’t care about your life or death, that your survival or demise had nothing to do with me. But I was truly frightened; I’m fearful of the unbearable pain of losing you again!
I have lost you more than once; you are my son—how could I truly not care about you deep down? I can’t ignore you, nor be indifferent to you. No matter what, the blood that flows in you is my own, and this blood connection can never be severed in this lifetime!"
