My Life with Narration-Chapter 291 - 289: Praying at the Last Minute

As the saying goes, when you catch a dead fish with the hook in its mouth, pack up and leave. The older generation believes in all sorts of strange things.

Of course, every profession has its own sayings. Take fishing, for example. If you reel in a dead fish with the hook embedded in its lips, it’s considered a bad omen. People think it’s the work of mischievous water spirits or ghosts playing tricks by hooking it for you. Most folks, out of superstition, will be frightened and move away, fearing something bad might happen.

If catching a dead fish is such a big deal, imagine reeling in a corpse! Comrade Lao Su was truly scared. Walking by the river often enough, it’s inevitable to get wet shoes, especially for someone who’s a fan of fishing in wild rivers.

As an experienced fisherman, Lao Su has caught all sorts of things: plastic bags, water bottles, turtles, rats, piglets, and even once a hammer! Truly making a catch of everything but the fish.

In short, Lao Su’s catches are always varied and colorful, except for fish, this time being his biggest "live" catch yet.

"Why do you look like that? If someone else didn’t know better, they’d think you used your soul as bait!" Zhou Hui spat.

"Ptooey, ptooey, ptooey" Lao Su reacted like he had been electrocuted upon hearing these words.

"What’s wrong?"

"Bad luck, watch what you say!"

Lao Su quickly replied. Despite appearing okay on the outside, his unease was unmistakable. After all, a normal person enjoying a lazy afternoon fishing isn’t prepared to reel in a body. Who wouldn’t be scared?

"What’s really going on, just tell us already!" Zhou Hui glared with the authority of an empress dowager.

After being together for decades, how could she not know his habits? Zhou Hui surely noticed Lao Su’s worried look.

Faced with this interrogation, Lao Su spilled the beans.

"Li and I were fishing and caught a girl!"

"A girl? How old, is she married, is she pretty? If she is, we could introduce her to our son..."

Before Zhou Hui could finish, both father and son reacted the same way.

"No way, absolutely not!"

"Mom, you can’t say things like that!"

Knowing the truth, Su Qing quickly covered his mom’s mouth.

Even though this isn’t some supernatural zone, it’s still best not to talk about such things casually. We’re not afraid of trouble, but no need to invite it, right? Amitabha, Amitabha, Su Qing mumbled hurriedly to himself.

"What’s the matter with you two?" Zhou Hui was puzzled. Wasn’t it just a girl they met while fishing? Was it too much for her to ask if she could introduce her to their son?

Comrade Lao Su glanced at his son, then explained, "It was a corpse!"

"Oh my God!" Zhou Hui shrieked, jumped up, and ran to the entrance. She looked around, then opened a cupboard and took out a small Buddha statue. Thinking it wasn’t enough, she grabbed a cross as well, then lit incense for both the Buddha and the cross, clasped her hands together, and prayed, "Buddha bless us, forgive the unknowing, forgive the unknowing, God bless, spirits be gone!"

Su Qing: ...

I must say, the deities in this household have no dignity, always summoned when needed and left to gather dust otherwise. The old practice of burning incense for blessings remained unchanged for the Buddha and the cross.

"Mom, do Western gods even have jurisdiction here?" Su Qing asked hesitantly.

Zhou Hui cast a disdainful glance at her son, "What do you know? What if that girl went abroad? Or maybe God is visiting our country, never mind embassies doing outreach. Praying more doesn’t cost anything, what’s there to fear!"

She had a point, really, there was no countering it. So that’s where his last-minute desperation faith habit came from!

Fortunately, it didn’t cost anything; if it did, they’d certainly be atheists. If you want me to pay after praying to gods, am I worshipping gods or money?

Mind you, from top to bottom, their family revered the omnipotent yet malevolent ’Moneyism,’ with the RMB as the sect’s deity!

Why not the US Dollar? Well, he’s never really encountered it; growing up, he’d never even seen foreign currency.

After Zhou Hui clasped her hands and prayed 49 times, she finally felt at ease, believing surely the girl would be forgiving.

After consideration, she also lit incense for the god of matchmaking, of course prioritizing a grandchild above all else. The god statue was respectfully placed among the others.

Even the god of matchmaking might not have expected one day to hold the centerpiece position between Buddha and God.

"Okay, keep talking."

With everything settled, Zhou Hui sat back on the sofa, nibbling on sunflower seeds, staring at her husband as if she’d forgotten what just happened.

The father and son sighed speechlessly.

"Everything was going fine today, the morning proceeded normally until 2 PM. Li and I found a shady spot, set up the tea set, and started fishing. Then, just half an hour later, we noticed the float moving..."

Lao Su recounted the day’s events, nothing odd or supernatural, just two poor and enthusiastic fishermen. They were fishing and drinking tea, when suddenly bubbles appeared underwater, and the hook got tangled.

At first, they thought they’d hooked a big fish, but they were shocked when a wrapped corpse surfaced, heavily decomposed and in pieces; it scared them both stiff.

"The worst nightmare for a fisherman is something like this, at least it was daylight; at night, it’d be terrorizing. You wouldn’t believe it, but Lao Li even threw his fishing rod away!" Lao Su said with lingering fear.

Hearing this, Su Qing couldn’t help but ask, "Father, why didn’t you throw away your fishing rod too when you said it was ominous?"

"What do you know? My fishing rod was expensive; I couldn’t bear the thought!" Su Hongye shot him a glance.

Oh, so money does indeed conquer the fear of ghosts and spirits.

"And then?" Unknowingly, Zhou Hui held half a watermelon, enraptured, pressing him for more details.

"Then? Lao Li called his daughter of course, thinking it might earn her some merit!"

The instant Su Qing heard this, a sense of foreboding swept over him, asking quickly, "Dad, did Uncle Li call Junjun?"

"Otherwise? Junjun is a police officer, and calling the police is no different than calling his daughter!"

Su Qing: ...

"You’re truly my biological dad, and you know it was my day off!"

To which Lao Su, slightly bemused, replied, "What’s it got to do with you? I heard from my colleague that you’re just a special consultant. Your sister Junjun is a criminal police officer; that’s real police work. You’re just an outsider, a third-party company!"

"Who are you calling an outsider? My son is a policeman, policeman, get it? Your son’s the outsider, your son..." Zhou Hui protested. In no way was she going to hear any disparaging remark about her son, not even from her husband. But halfway through, she realized it was the same son and felt awkward.

Just then, his phone rang; it was Li Zijun. And a voiceover suddenly spoke in his mind:

[Congratulations, you’ve learned to anticipate and answer!]

Su Qing: "Damn it, anticipate yourself, you bastard!@#￥%...&

...