The Best of Tomorrow-Chapter 5Vol 2. .

□ ■ □

Earphones in, I furrowed my brows. I dragged the playback bar back and tried to focus again on the sound. You’d think I’d be used to it by now, but writing previews was always such a chore. I irritably hit the enter key.

“Seriously... What is he even mumbling about?”

I turned up the volume and dragged the playback bar back again. As I tapped the keyboard, the phone next to my mouse vibrated and scooted across the desk. I picked up the flipped phone.

[Run to your mailbox, quick.]

It was a message from Seon-jae. I leaned back in my chair and typed out a reply.

[What are you talking about?]

[Go check the mailbox on the first floor.]

[Did you send something?]

[Yeah. I wanted to give it to you in person, but I failed.]

“What the...”

I grabbed my phone and got up from the chair. I took the elevator down and headed to the mailboxes. I glanced around to see if Seon-jae might be hiding nearby, but he was nowhere to be seen. I crouched down and reached into my box.

...?

I felt something. It didn’t have the sharp corners of an envelope, so it felt strange. I grasped it and pulled it out of the box.

“Oh my god.”

It was a pink flower. I was surprised there was a flower in my mailbox—but more than that, I realized I had grabbed the bud, not the stem. I quickly unclenched my fist. I must’ve squeezed it really hard in that brief moment, because one petal had already torn ◈ Nоvеlіgһт ◈ (Continue reading) and stuck to my palm.

I held it by the stem and looked at the flower. Its soft pink petals layered beautifully. I carefully checked the mailbox again, just in case there was something else, but that was it. Just one flower.

[What is this? Did you put this in yourself?]

Holding my phone with both hands, the stem stuck out to the side. The flower swayed every time I moved my hand.

[Yeah. I was getting coffee and saw a flower shop next door. It was so pretty I bought one. They said it’s called a lisianthus. It’s saying what I wanted to tell you.]

It’s saying what he wanted to tell me? What does that mean? I opened a browser and searched “lisianthus.” The scientific name, origin, size, and habitat came up. Among the info was the flower’s meaning: unchanging love. I let out a small laugh and smiled.

[Do you have a schedule today?]

[Yeah. I’m recording a radio show.]

I twisted the stem with my fingers, making the flower spin. I brought the bud close to my nose and sniffed. It smelled lovely. I pictured Seon-jae being distracted by the flower while holding his coffee—and couldn’t stop smiling.

[Thank you.]

I leaned against the elevator wall. Just looking at the flower made the corners of my mouth rise. Grinning like an idiot, I carefully tucked the flower into my pocket just before the elevator doors opened.

□ ■ □

“Maknae.”

Even before I turned toward the knock, the door swung open.

“Yes?”

“Run this to the general editing room.”

I stood up and took the tape.

“Go now.”

“Yes, understood.”

I pushed in my chair, grabbed my coat, and put it on. Just as I was about to leave, my eyes landed on the flower I’d left on my desk. I thought someone might toss it while I was away, so I tucked it into my coat pocket. Seeing the bloom poking out made me grin.

I scanned my pass card and waited for the elevator. As I tapped the tape against my fingers, someone stepped beside me. The elevator door soon opened, and as we stepped in together, I glanced over and my eyes went wide.

It was Kwon Seong-jun.

There were only three of us in the elevator: his manager, him, and me. I shrank into a corner, stood with my feet tightly together, clutching the tape with both hands. I rolled my eyes around nervously, stealing glances at Kwon Seong-jun’s face.

The manager stood right at the door, looking at his phone. Maybe he felt my gaze, because Kwon Seong-jun turned to look at me. Our eyes met, and I quickly looked away to the wall. Why was I this tense? I swallowed hard and bit my dry lips.

I kept staring at the wall, but I could feel eyes on me. My fingers scratched nervously at the tape. When I glanced sideways—eye contact.

Why... why is he looking?

I knew who he was, but we didn’t know each other personally. I wasn’t about to bow and say, Oh, Kwon Seong-jun! Nice to meet you! I’m a fan. I love your music! I just kept my eyes down on the tips of my shoes. I hadn’t done anything wrong, but his presence made me feel small.

The elevator doors opened. I glanced up at the floor display. The manager stepped out, and so did Kwon Seong-jun. As he walked off, he turned to look back. Not at me—at the flower in my pocket. I stood frozen in the corner. The doors closed, and his figure disappeared. Alone again, I let out a deep sigh.

“What the hell. That was scary.”

I brushed my chest with my hand. I’d gotten way too tense in those few seconds.

□ ■ □

A singer who debuted through an audition program two years ago had just gotten caught in a dating scandal. One of the panel idols from that show had been named as the alleged partner. The report claimed that the two had developed feelings during filming and began officially dating after the program ended.

The singer had come in third place—not quite to the final stage—but went on to sing OSTs for dramas and films, even charting a few times.

The comment section under the article was a war zone. All that crying about chasing your dream, and now you’re just out looking for a boyfriend? The mocking tone was relentless. Normally, when a dating rumor broke out, I’d just shrug, Ah, guess they’re dating. But this time, it didn’t feel like someone else’s story.

How do they even take pictures like this? The angles alone showed some insane determination from the paparazzi—it was impressive and absurd at the same time.

“So it finally blew up.”

Shim Won-jun said, sipping through a straw while scrolling on his phone. I’d been sitting there with my hands folded between my knees, staring blankly. I looked up.

“You knew?”

He twirled the straw in his cup and nodded.

“They were dating?”

I bit my lip and nodded too.

“You hear everything in this business.”

“You hear it as rumors? That stuff really goes around?”

I asked in surprise, but Shim Won-jun seemed amused. He leaned in on his elbow.

“You have any idea how many eyes and mouths are in this industry? Celebrities are never alone. There’s always at least one staff member. Usually more. Sometimes several cars’ worth.”

“Ah... well, that’s true.”

I suddenly worried—did people around Seon-jae know too?

“Hwang Gak-su? Total chain smoker. Not at all like his boyish image. Apparently smokes like a chimney inside the van.”

“Ah...”

“It’s just like us venting about our coworkers. Their teams gossip about how difficult their own artists are, complain, whine—it’s the same.”

My face darkened. I didn’t care about celebrity temperaments. I was only worried—what if Seon-jae’s name was one of those countless rumors? Whispered from one mouth to another?

Shim Won-jun wiggled his finger at me.

“Sol-ssi, you like a celeb, don’t you? You look super worried.”

“Huh?”

I blinked and focused on his face.

“But it’s just rumors.”

I stared at him, looking like I was about to cry.

“If every rumor turned into an article, the internet would explode. Dating rumors barely ever go public.”

“...Really?”

He nodded.

“Usually it only comes out if one of them is a top star, or they’ve dated a long time, or if there’s some big scandal. If the agency blocks it, it won’t leak.”

“Ah... what about when they date non-celebrities?”

He slurped his iced coffee before replying.

“If it’s a non-celebrity, it almost never gets reported.”

“...Really? How do you know so much?”

He shrugged.

“Didn’t I say? I used to be a journalist before I quit and came here.”

“Seriously? Then your words are actually credible!”

I smacked the table and sat up straight. Shim Won-jun laughed.

“Not really. I was in the politics department.”

My upright posture slumped instantly.

“I see...”

He smirked, enjoying my expression.

“You don’t need to worry.”

“...Who says I’m worried? I don’t like idols.”

“With someone like Potato Pancakes, you’re safe. Especially if they’re dating a non-celeb.”

I spat out my coffee. I quickly turned my head and covered my mouth. Shim Won-jun recoiled with wide eyes.

“Why are you spitting?”

I stared at him with big, round eyes. My expression practically shouted, What did you just say?

“What?”

“...Ah, no. It’s just...”

“Don’t worry. I don’t know who it is.”

He spoke calmly and took another sip. I had no idea what he meant, or how I was supposed to react. I blinked, dazed. Shim Won-jun pulled the straw from his lips and continued.

“That time we drank at the pojangmacha? I went to the bathroom, and when I came back, someone was sitting in my seat. I thought some guy was hitting on you, so I almost stepped in—but it was Ryu Seon-jae. The vibe was... not normal. So I stayed outside. Freezing.”

“......”

“And last time, I saw Baek In-hyeok putting something in our company mailbox. Turned out it was a letter for you.”

“......”

He calmly recounted everything while looking at my despair-ridden face with a smile.

“Don’t worry. I just have really sharp instincts.”

“...No, I mean, it’s not like that.”

“Your secret’s safe with me. I’ll take it to the grave.”

He nodded solemnly and sipped his drink again. I was so flustered I couldn’t even fake a smile. I blinked in confusion, but inside—I was crying. If even Shim Won-jun had figured it out, could we really keep this relationship secret?

My phone vibrated. I let go of the straw I’d been biting and pulled it from my pocket.

[The thing I recorded today airs Saturday at 10PM. Hope you listen.]

My thumb hovered, unable to type a reply. Then a new message popped up.

[Or... should we listen to it together?]

I could almost hear Seon-jae’s gentle voice through the screen. What should I do, Seon-jae? Loving someone isn’t a bad thing. But those horrible comments from the article earlier came rushing back, and the corners of my eyes drooped.

□ ■ □

I filled the pot with water. I’d never cooked two packs at once, so I wasn’t sure how much to add. I tilted and straightened the water bottle back and forth, estimating by eye. Seon-jae leaned against the kitchen counter, snapped the ramen packets in half, and set them down.

“I’ll cook it.”

“No, it’s fine. You go sit.”

I nudged him with my elbow. He let himself be nudged and went to sit on the couch, smiling. It was just ramen, but I felt like I was cooking a gourmet dish—my shoulders stiffened with pride. I chopped green onions and cracked three eggs.

We didn’t even have a proper trivet. I placed an old study guide I’d meant to throw out on the table. That would do. As I walked over with the pot, Seon-jae looked up and laughed. I promise you, Ryu Seon-jae, that smile of yours is about to disappear.

I set the pot down with a sheepish face and sat. Seon-jae swirled the noodles with his chopsticks, then looked up at me. His expression said, What on earth did you just serve me?

“...It’s my first time cooking two packs.”

“Told you I should’ve done it.”

“You’re a guest. I can’t make you do that.”

I awkwardly scratched my chin. If there hadn’t been enough water, I could’ve just added more—but I had added way too much. Even after dumping in all the soup powder, the broth looked almost clear.

“This could cook four packs.”

“...Should I add two more?”

When I asked seriously, Seon-jae burst out laughing.

“Can you even eat that much?”

I shook my head. I’d made the same mistake once before and suffered for it.

There was so much broth you couldn’t even see the noodles. Seon-jae stirred the pot with his chopsticks and scooped out some noodles onto my small plate before handing it over. I accepted the plate and just waited for him to take the first bite. It was just ramen, sure—but it was also the first food I’d ever cooked for him, so I was secretly curious what he’d think.

He twirled the noodles with his chopsticks and put them into his mouth. As he chewed, he looked at me. His expression seemed to say, Why aren’t you eating?

“It’s not totally inedible, at least.”

“Hey...”

His tone made me feel deflated, but then Seon-jae smiled softly.

“Watching you cook ramen, I think I’d be better at cooking than you.”

I twirled some noodles on my chopsticks and looked at him. That felt unfair. I’ve been living alone for years. I’ve cooked for myself countless times.

“No way. I make great curry.”

“Curry? Don’t tell me... three-minute curry?”

“......”

How did he know? I couldn’t answer, and Seon-jae set down his chopsticks and burst out laughing. I sat there, sulking. Okay, so it was three-minute curry, but I added sausages, potatoes, sweet potatoes, onions, carrots...

After he finally stopped laughing, Seon-jae reached out and gently pinched my cheek.

“I’ll cook for you.”

His hand was on my cheek. I blinked up at him, not even realizing how much he was pinching. He said he’d cook for me. When, exactly? Shouldn’t we set a firm date for that? My thoughts were spiraling uselessly when I snapped back to reality.

Thankfully, Seon-jae busily worked through his chopsticks, and the ramen was gone. Well, not the broth. I tried to get up right after eating to take the pot away, but Seon-jae grabbed my arm and held me back.

“I’ll clean it up later.”

I sat back down, lowering my half-lifted hips and nodded. Seon-jae, who’d tried to finish off the broth, collapsed flat onto the floor.

“My stomach’s not just full—it feels like it’s gonna burst.”

I sat beside him and rubbed his stomach. Then my eyes widened.

“Wow, hey—look at your belly.”

“What are you talking about? I’ve been working out like crazy lately. This is just because I tried to drink all that broth.”

“Oh, really?”

I poked his belly with my finger. He squirmed and laughed. Seon-jae was weak to tickling. Seo Yun-jae used to give him punishments like “don’t laugh during tickling” just to mess with him.

Whenever he had to endure it, Seon-jae wouldn’t last even a second before screaming. He’d surrender right away. But Seo Yun-jae would ignore him, chasing him around and tickling him relentlessly. Seeing that firsthand, I sort of got why Seo Yun-jae couldn’t help teasing him. His smile was cute, and he reacted instantly—it just made you want to mess with him more.

“Hold it in.”

I tickled his side with a finger, and Seon-jae twisted away, grabbed my hand, and pulled me toward him. I fell into his arms. He wrapped one arm around my neck, threw a leg over my body, and locked me in.

“Ah—hey, let go!”

I squirmed, trying to escape, but Seon-jae just tightened his grip.

“I’m terrible at holding back.”

“...Okay, okay. I won’t do it again.”

“What am I terrible at?”

“Holding back.”

Seon-jae brought his face next to my ear. Then, smooch, he kissed my cheek. My eyes flew wide open. I twisted my neck awkwardly against his arm to look at him. His face was right there.

“I’ve been holding that back too.”

A smile spread slowly across his face. I felt like I’d just been outplayed. He looked so entertained, as if teasing me was the best thing ever. Watching that expression, I could feel my cheeks start to burn.

“...You think teasing me is fun?”

I pouted, looked up, and met his gaze. His stare was soft and quiet, and it dried my lips. My heart was pounding, and I resisted the urge to take a deep breath, afraid he’d hear it. His serious face no longer had any trace of laughter. I felt the tickle of his breath.

“You’re so honest sometimes, it catches me off guard. But then other times, you can’t even look me in the eye.”

“...Me?”

“Yeah.”

I blinked. Every time our eyes met, mine kept trying to dart away, but I forced them to stay focused on his face. After hearing him say I couldn’t hold eye contact, I suddenly wanted to prove him wrong. Like, That’s not true. I can totally look at you.

I memorized every detail—his thick eyebrows, his gaze, his lashes. His round, soft eyes were crystal clear.

“You’re handsome.”

It just slipped out. A slow smile spread on Seon-jae’s face, and his eyes curved like crescents.

“Handsome, huh?”

I got embarrassed and just nodded instead of answering out loud.

“I’m yours.”

“......”

What did I just hear? I bit my lip and looked up. My lips were pressed so tightly they hurt—I felt like I might start grinning ear to ear, like when I watched videos of him.

“Hey... you... how do you just say stuff like that...”

I didn’t finish the sentence, just mouthed the words. Seon-jae took his leg off me and unwrapped his arm from around my neck.

“I’m not some smooth talker. I just say it even though it makes me shy.”

The warmth between us cooled by just a few inches of space. I tilted my head and looked at him. His ears were red.

“That’s the first time I’ve said something like that.”

I pressed my lips tightly, but a laugh burst out. I covered my mouth with both hands. Seon-jae looked at me like, I was being serious and sincere, and you’re laughing? I quickly fixed my expression and met his eyes again. His face hadn’t changed.

“This is the first time I’ve felt like this too.”

I reached over and gently pinched his cheek.

“Why are you so cute, Ryu Seon-jae.”

He quietly let me pinch his cheek and smiled. My eyes got caught on the dimple in his lowered cheek. I looked back into his eyes. No one was tickling me, but my whole body felt tingly.

We lay side by side in the living room, listening to the radio. My head rested on Seon-jae’s stomach while he absentmindedly played with my hair. I didn’t hear his voice much. Baek In-hyeok did most of the talking, and Woo Hyeon-seong and Seo Yun-jae chimed in. Seon-jae mostly laughed and only answered questions directed at him.

It wasn’t his first radio appearance, so I wondered why he wanted me to listen so badly. I thought maybe he had shared something special—but he hadn’t. Most of the questions he got were just common stories about the group.

“Then why’d you want me to listen to the radio?”

“I sang a song on it. And it reminded me of you.”

The feeling of him playing with my hair was comforting. I got drowsy. We stayed quiet, listening. The listener story segment began, where they sang live based on submitted letters.

Kwon Seong-jun went first. A listener wrote in about their younger sibling who had to retake the college entrance exam. As they talked about the story, Seong-jun’s own sibling came up.

— Seong-jun is such a softie for his younger sibling.

That was Baek In-hyeok. The others chimed in with agreement.

— But my sibling actually likes Seon-jae more than me.

That was Seong-jun himself. More comments followed. The original story was long gone. The show was a mess, but I kept listening.

Eventually, the song request from the listener came on: Be One. Woo Hyeon-seong laughed, and Seo Yun-jae scolded him in a dead-serious voice. The DJ tried to clean up the mood, and then Seong-jun’s song began.

— We can do it, we can rise again

— All the hardships and trials

— We overcame them together, as one

I listened with my eyes closed, and my cheeks lifted without me realizing. I shouldn’t be laughing, considering the story was about a tough college retake year—but Seong-jun’s singing was too pitiful-sounding.

“Why are you laughing?”

“Huh?”

I looked up to see Seon-jae glancing down at me with his head tilted.

“What’s so funny about Seong-jun’s song?”

He gently poked my forehead with his finger. Why was I laughing? Because it was funny. I pouted and lowered my head. I turned on my side, and my ear pressed against Seon-jae’s stomach. My head rose and fell with his breathing. I looked up and saw his chin. I reached up and rubbed it with my finger. It felt a little rough.

“You’ve got stubble. You’ve really grown up.”

Seon-jae let out a chuckle. After a while, I heard his voice. I slowly opened my eyes. His hand gently stroked my hair. It was a Kim Hyung-joong song. Seon-jae’s voice rose with the melody. Clear and sweet, it filled the space.

I listened closely to his singing. Still lying on his stomach, I eventually ended up sliding up to rest on his chest. My ear sank into his chest. I thought I could hear his heartbeat mixed with the music. The soaring high note—Even if I become a fool as long as it brings you joy—was so refreshing. How was he so good at singing? His high notes were so beautiful.

With one ear on his chest, I stared at the floor, then flipped over and propped myself up on my elbows to look at him. Lying on the floor without a pillow, our eyes met. The radio was playing Seon-jae’s voice, and the man himself was quietly staring at me. My heart raced.

“Seon-jae.”

He met my eyes silently.

“I’m really glad I have you.”

His eyelids shifted softly. As I stared deeper into his eyes, I started to feel shy and buried my face in his chest. I must’ve hit him hard, because he let out a quiet oof. But I didn’t lift my face. I couldn’t see his expression. Just as I was drowning in embarrassment after blurting out a random confession, I felt his hand gently stroke the back of my head.

“I’m glad I found you again too.”

I could feel his chest thumping beneath my face.

I walked Seon-jae to the front door. I said I’d see him off to the taxi, but he pressed his palm to my forehead and pushed me back, telling me to stay inside.

“You wouldn’t even let me say hi outside. Why’re you trying to walk me out now?”

“Ah, that’s...”

“Stay home. If you come out, I’ll just end up walking you back anyway.”

I pouted and nodded. Seon-jae slipped on his sneakers, bent down, and fixed the crushed heels. Once both feet were in, he straightened up and met my eyes.

“Seon-jae.”

“Yeah?”

“Us... who knows we’re seeing each other?”

He fiddled with the hem of his coat as I asked.

“No one. I haven’t told anyone.”

My eyes widened in surprise.

“No one?”

“Yeah. I didn’t say a word.”

This guy... he was sneakily tight-lipped. Pleased, I nodded big.

“You?”

“Me too.”

I hadn’t told anyone either—but... we had been caught. As I fidgeted with his coat, Seon-jae took my hand and held it.

“I don’t want you to get hurt. But I also don’t want you keeping me at arm’s length over something that hasn’t even happened yet.”

“......”

“You know what I mean, right?”

“Yeah.”

He let go of my hand and caressed my cheek.

“I’m heading out.”

“Okay. Be safe.”

Seon-jae turned, opened the door, and stepped out. I stood on my slippers, waving. He grinned and nodded as he closed the door. Just when I thought it had shut, it opened slightly again—Seon-jae peeked his face back in.

I’d already lowered my hand after thinking the door had closed. I looked at him standing there, peeking through the gap.

“What?”

“Come here.”

“Why?”

“I forgot something important.”

I shuffled closer to the door. Seon-jae looked at me. What’s going on? Did he forget money for the taxi? But then, his face lowered. He stopped just as our noses were about to touch.

A startled noise slipped from my mouth—and then his lips touched mine. A soft sensation spread across them quickly. I forgot to close my eyes, forgot to focus—I just stared wide-eyed. I think I saw a smile through the blur.

“I’m really leaving now,” he said, and the door shut.

I stood frozen in front of the door, touching my lips.

“Uh... I just kissed Seon-jae...”

My face flushed bright red. I cupped my cheeks with both hands and looked down. My cheeks were burning. My heart thudded so loud, it felt like it might burst out of my chest.

I crouched on the spot, burying my face into my knees and let out a groan.

So this is what it means to be happy enough to die. My chest hurt from how fast it was beating.