The Lazy Chronicles: Apartment of the Apocalypse-Chapter 68: Zombies, Raiders, and A Petting Zoo

The gas station proved a somewhat decent place to rest. Greg’s snores resonated through the small building like a growling bear, while Alex grumbled about being paired with Mallory for the morning scout. She claimed she needed beauty sleep, which somehow excused her from all strenuous activities.

"Mallory, wake up!" Alex’s sharp whisper barely stirred her.

"I am awake," Mallory mumbled from her corner, blanket pulled over her head. "I’m practicing tactical stillness."

"Tactical stillness? Is that what we’re calling laziness now?" Alex asked, hands on his hips.

Greg burst out laughing, his sides shaking. "That’s why we keep her around! Tactical stillness might just save our lives one day."

Before Alex could counter, Blinky chirped and rolled toward the door, its sensors picking up movement outside. Everyone froze.

Greg crouched by the window and peeked out. "We’ve got company. Zombies, maybe ten or fifteen."

"Perfect. Just the way I like to start my day," Mallory groaned, sitting up at last.

The group quickly gathered their weapons. Clara gave instructions in her usual calm but firm tone, laying out a plan to clear the area and get moving.

"Mallory," Clara began, pointing at her.

"Oh no," Mallory interrupted. "Don’t assign me the important tasks. I’m more of a cheerleader."

"You’re on lookout. Do not fall asleep."

---

The group exited cautiously, keeping close to the walls of the gas station. Clara’s plan was simple: draw the zombies into a tight group and pick them off one by one. Greg and Alex handled most of the heavy lifting while Mallory held her vantage point from atop the gas station’s roof.

For the most part, the plan worked perfectly—until Blinky decided it wanted to help.

The little robot skittered into the middle of the fray, its tiny claws clinking against the pavement as it zoomed toward a cluster of zombies. The group watched in stunned silence as Blinky extended an appendage, releasing a small but surprisingly potent spark that ignited a nearby puddle of oil.

A loud BOOM followed as the fire spread, engulfing half the zombies in flames.

"What the—Blinky?!" Clara shouted, ducking as debris flew past her.

Mallory collapsed into hysterical laughter, holding her stomach. "Blinky just soloed half the horde!"

"That thing’s a menace!" Alex shouted, narrowly dodging a flaming zombie.

"Menace or MVP?" Greg countered, his eyes wide with amusement.

The group managed to clear the rest of the zombies with little effort, though Clara spent the next ten minutes scolding Mallory for not controlling her "pet."

---

Later that day, the group found themselves on the outskirts of a small rural town. The streets were eerily quiet, with only the occasional moan of distant zombies breaking the silence.

"We’ll need to be quick," Clara said. "Raiders could be nearby."

They moved cautiously through the town, scavenging supplies where they could. Mallory wandered into a small building marked Sunny Hill Petting Zoo, her curiosity piqued.

"Mallory, where are you going?" Alex called after her.

"I need to see this," she replied, pushing the door open.

The inside of the building was surprisingly intact. Posters of smiling children and fluffy animals lined the walls, and the faint smell of hay lingered in the air. As she moved further in, Mallory froze at the sight of several cages containing... live animals.

"Oh my God," she whispered. "It’s like Christmas came early."

Greg and Clara joined her, their jaws dropping as they took in the scene.

"There’s no way these animals survived on their own," Greg said, inspecting a cage of chickens.

Mallory’s eyes lit up as she spotted a goat nibbling on what looked like a zombie hand. "I think they’ve been helping themselves to the apocalypse buffet."

"Gross," Alex muttered, though he couldn’t hide his grin.

Mallory reached out to pet the goat, which promptly headbutted her in response.

"Rude!" she exclaimed, stumbling backward. "I was trying to be nice!"

Clara shook her head. "We can’t take them with us, Mallory."

"But they could be useful!" Mallory argued. "Goats eat anything, right? Maybe they’ll eat zombies too."

Greg burst out laughing. "Zombie-eating goats? That’s the plot of a bad sci-fi movie."

"You’re all just jealous of my genius," Mallory huffed, crossing her arms.

---

As they exited the petting zoo, loaded down with fresh eggs and a few bottles of milk, the group heard the rumble of an engine in the distance. They quickly ducked into an alley, peering out to see a group of heavily armed raiders driving through the town.

"Great," Clara whispered. "Just what we needed."

The raiders stopped in front of a nearby building, their leader—a tall woman with a scar running down her face—barking orders at her crew.

Mallory couldn’t help herself. "Ooooh, she looks like she means business."

"Shh!" Alex hissed, clamping a hand over her mouth.

The group watched as the raiders began loading supplies into their truck. It was clear they’d been using the town as a base, and the idea of sneaking past them seemed increasingly impossible.

"What’s the plan?" Greg whispered.

Clara frowned, her mind racing. "We wait until they leave, then make our way out of town as quickly as possible."

Unfortunately, Blinky had other ideas.

The little robot, perhaps emboldened by its earlier victory, skittered out from the alley and straight toward the raiders’ truck.

"Blinky, no!" Mallory whispered furiously, but it was too late.

The raiders turned in unison, their weapons raised, as Blinky began circling their truck and emitting a series of high-pitched beeps.

"What the hell is that thing?" one of the raiders shouted.

Before anyone could react, Blinky extended its sparking appendage and set the truck’s tires on fire.

Chaos erupted as the raiders scrambled to put out the flames, giving the group a chance to slip away unnoticed.

Once they were a safe distance from the town, Clara rounded on Mallory.

"Control. Your. Robot."

"I’m trying!" Mallory protested. "But Blinky’s a free spirit! You can’t cage that kind of brilliance."

Greg and Alex were doubled over with laughter, while Altair simply shook his head in disbelief.

---

That night, as they set up camp, Mallory couldn’t help but feel a small sense of pride. They might be a ragtag group of misfits with a knack for stumbling into trouble, but they were surviving—and somehow, they were even having a little fun along the way.

As she lay under the stars, Blinky perched on her chest, Mallory whispered, "You’re the real MVP, little buddy."

Blinky chirped in agreement.

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