The Young Miss Refuse To Love-Chapter 109: I’m very selfish person

"I’m intrigued." Qi Jianyi softly replied. Her face fell into wonder. Seeing her serious expression, Song Chengfeng raised his hand and gently flickered her forehead.

"What are you thinking about?" He asked.

"I’m thinking about what the other Song Chengfeng look like." Qi Jianyi answered him half-heartedly as she rubbed her forehead.

"Stop thinking about him." Song Chengfeng’s voice soured. Jealousy clearly reflected in his face.

"What are you jealous of? I haven’t even met the other you yet." Noticed the jealousy in his face, Qi Jianyi rolled her eyes.

"You want to meet him?" He echoed seriously. Apparently, when it comes to rivals in love, Song Chengfeng was very discerning.

Though the ’other’ Song Chengfeng hasn’t met Qi Jianyi yet. He knew that the other him would also fall in love with her.

Because, for some reason, Song Chengfeng believed that he was destined to fall in love with Qi Jianyi.

"In the future..." Song Chengfeng slowly mumbled, his words were very low, only him and Qi Jianyi could hear it. "When you return to your world and if by any chance, you meet another me in your world. Don’t be with him. He’s not me."

His voice, soft but hoarse, laced with genuine anxiety. Just like how Song Chengfeng knew that he would never be able to love the original Qi Jianyi, he also hoped Qi Jianyi would not be moved by the other him just because they shared the same face.

Qi Jianyi was bewildered by his request. She studied him for a while. Not knowing how to react to his words.

"Song Chengfeng, when I love someone, I will love them till the end. Until there’s nothing left for me to love." She opened her mouth to reply that she knows the difference between him and the other Song Cheng.

Yet, for some reason, she uttered completely different words.

Song Chengfeng met her eyes, staring at her with his usual fond eyes that seemed to only belong to Qi Jianyi. He waited for her to continue.

"But I am very selfish." Qi Jianyi continues, forming a small smile on her serious face. "I’d rather have regrets over leaving the person I love than letting go of my dream."

She breaks their eye contact and turns to look at her siblings and cousins. At some point, they were lining up to enter the haunted house. Leaving the two of them behind to talk.

The amusement park was bustling and crowded. But since Qi Jianyi and Song Chengfeng stood near a renovated building, the crowd was less.

"If you want a living proof. Then, that Xu Yichen was my living proof. He’s a regret that I would always carry with me..."

Her blunt words unknowingly shaken Song Chengfeng’s heart. The hand that was still clasped with Qi Jianyi couldn’t help but tightened.

"But like I said, I am very selfish. If I were to go back in time. I would still make the same choice and abandon him when it’s time." Qi Jianyi let go of her hand that had been in Song Chengfeng’s grip.

"I’ve erased all of my feelings for him and the only thing that left was this regret. I’ve liked him at one point in my life and continue to carry this feeling until it eventually dies. I do not wish to be with him again, nor do I wish to be with anyone else. Because I knew that I would only look for a glimpse of Xu Yichen in another man."

At that moment, hearing her blunt truth in the most unsuitable place made Song Chengfeng’s whole body stumped. He understood the meaning behind her words. There’s a chance that Qi Jianyi only looked at him because he reminded her of her ex boyfriend.

The more Song Chengfeng digested her words, the more he envied Xu Yichen.

And Qi Jianyi, how could she not notice his hurt look? Song Chengfeng was clearly hurt by her words yet he doesn’t even say anything.

"And you, Chengfeng. You and him are so—" Before she could finish her words, Song Chengfeng, who finally composed himself, stopped her.

"That’s enough. I don’t need to hear more of it." His words lowered, stern even. But though he was hurt, there was no resentment in his voice and actions.

Song Chengfeng didn’t want to continue the conversation that had suddenly diverted from his original request. He turned away from Qi Jianyi and walked towards He Zeqing and the others.

Unfortunately for Song Chengfeng, Qi Jianyi had no plans to acquiesce by his request and continue expressing what she wanted to say. She had to say it before Song Chengfeng misunderstood her more than he already had.

"Both of you are so different. There’s not even a single thing alike..." Song Chengfeng’s step that was about to leave Qi Jianyi halted. He turned back, his face couldn’t hide his astonishment.

"You’re so different from him, so stubborn and persistent that no matter how I tried to push you away, you still stay. I liked Xu Yichen because he lightened up my world that was never dark before. He was like a lightbulb on bright days..." Qi Jianyi took a step forward, a step closer to Song Chengfeng who was a few steps away.

"And that lightbulb was hanging very high from me which I couldn’t reach no matter how much I tried. And when I was doing my best to build a ladder to get to that lightbulb. It had died. There’s no more light from him." Her eyelashes tremble slightly at the memories that she used to refuse to remember.

"When that lightbulb died, my world already darkened, only the light of the moon. I didn’t try to repair the broken lightbulb nor did I buy a new one. Because I chose to embrace the darkness." She raised her hand and caressed Song Chengfeng’s cheeks.

"I no longer need any light from anyone. Even when I was stranded in this world. I have no hope in anyone other than myself. While I was comforting myself in my darkened world, you, Song Chengfeng dared to forcefully enter my world. You knocked, and when you were denied permission to enter, you broke into it directly. Engulfed me in your presence. Suffocating me with your affection." After saying that, she put down her hands. Her eyes turned cold.

"And I hate you for that." Song Chengfeng stiffened. His heart was stirred by her words, but before he could savor the warmth, he was washed away by a cold bucket of ice.

"I hate that you don’t know when to stop. I hate the fact that you break into my world easily and find a place to stay. You were like a huge boulder, an obstacle that I need to overcome. I thought you were a hindrance. But I was wrong. You lend me a shoulder to cry, you let me use my words to hurt you. You, who had every right to leave, stood still in front of me and let me humiliate you with rejection every time."

"You should hate me. Yet, just a simple smile from me shattered your hatred. I’ve read, I’ve written, I’ve witnessed countless love stories. Yet, I never thought I would stumble upon a man, who is much older than me, yet so novice when it comes to love."

Qi Jianyi took a glance at He Zeqing who was about to come their way. Their turn to enter the haunted house has arrived and it’s time for the two of them to go.

But, how could she leave when the situation between her and Song Chengfeng had reached this point?

Fortunately, He Zeqing noticed something was wrong with Song Chengfeng’s expression. In the end, he didn’t come forward and drag the three teenagers to enter the haunted house. Leaving them wondering why Song Chengfeng and Qi Jianyi didn’t follow.

Qi Jianyi turned her attention to Song Chengfeng who seemed to be stuck in a daze.

"Song Chengfeng, I will regret many things about us in the future. But, just like before, I will carry those regrets with me until my last breath. Because unlike Xu Yichen whom I chose to abandon, you and I, we will never have the chance to be together."

"I hope that even when I leave in the future, you will continue to think about me. Because for once, I want to do something for myself. Even if it will only destroy both of us."

Before Song Chengfeng could completely digest her words, Qi Jianyi took a step closer and stood on her toes, narrowing their distance.

Her eyes, meeting his daze gaze. With a small smile, she stretched out her left hand and wrapped it around his neck. Her right hand touched his cheek softly before she closed the distance between them and landed a gentle kiss on his lips for a few seconds.

"Let me be selfish and accept your love, Song Chengfeng."

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