This Young Master is not Cannon Fodder-Chapter 419: Confession
A young man who appeared to be in his early twenties sat across from a woman who also appeared to be in her early twenties. Both wore purple brocade robes, but the man had golden embroidery of dragons on his, while the woman had silver embroidery of phoenixes. A golden coronet held up the man’s hair while silver hair pins decorated the woman’s hair.
The man and woman only had one similar feature, one so distinct that anyone would know at a glance the two were related. No one could ignore those two pairs of bedeviling eyes. Just one look could make anyone mesmerized. Most people would think that the two were siblings based on appearance alone. However, the true nature of the two’s relationship was that of a mother and her son.
They were the Huang Realm’s sole immortal sovereign, Xi Mengfei, the Sword Sovereign, and one of the few immortal emperors, Xi Tianyi, the Nine Heavens Emperor.
Tianyi poured some more tea into his cup and refilled his mother’s cup. With slow movement, he took the cup and took a measured sip. His mother did the same, only her eyes never left his body. For others, it might be weird for another person to stare unblinkingly at them for hours, but Tianyi was used to it. Especially from his mother.
He opened his mouth, but no words came out. Finally, he took another sip. He had repeated this action for the last few hours. During this time, aside from the initial conversation, the two had fallen silent.
Mengfei was fine, but Tianyi was growing uncomfortable. He wanted to leave, but he had already sworn to confess everything before leaving. Sure, he could leave now, but Tianyi wasn’t sure when he could work up the courage again. Honestly, he wanted to just focus on his conduit’s action in his inner universe and just let this one stall, but that felt disrespectful to his mother.
In the end, it wasn’t Tianyi who spoke out first, but Mengfei. “Yi’er, if you do not want to spend time with me, you can tell me. I won’t hold you here. You can leave whenever you want. I—”
“No! I want to spend time with you!” Tianyi stood and stared down at Mengfei, his eyes stared straight into hers. “I just, I just have something I have to come clean about.”
“—know how married couples can’t stand spending a day without each other.”
“Huh?” Tianyi let out.
Mengfei blinked a few times. “Is that not the case? I heard once a son is married, they will feel that their mother is naggy and not want to spend time with their mothers anymore, preferring to stay with their wife.”
“Who the hell told you that? That is not true,” Tianyi said. He slowly sat back down and scooted his chair in, pretending he didn’t just have an outburst.
“That’s probably true,” Mengfei said with a nod. “You already wanted to move out before you were married, so it can’t be the daughter-in-law that is the problem.”
Tianyi just nodded. He didn’t know where Mengfei got all this strange information from. This wouldn’t be the first time. He reached for another sip of tea.
“Earlier, what did you mean when you said you wanted to come clean?”
And promptly spat it back out. “You actually heard that?”
“How could I not? You shouted it in front of me,” Mengfei said. “What did you want to come clean about? You’re not planning anything dangerous, are you?”
‘I don’t think there’s anything that is more dangerous than war,’ Tianyi thought. ‘Or inner devils, those are a pain.’
“Why aren’t you saying that?” Mengfei narrowed her eyes. “Did Grand Elder Xia ask you to do something unreasonable again? He promised me he wouldn’t ask you to do anything dangerous ever again after the war.”
“Wait, that’s why you agreed?” Tianyi asked. “I thought it was strange that you allowed me to attack the Eight Pillar Sect alone.”
“No, I had complete confidence in you,” Mengfei said without batting an eye. “But knowing your excellence and not wanting you to be in danger are two different matters. If you weren’t talented, you would have never left my side. I would not let you go to the Northern Region with Elder Shan, or the Three Heavens Connection Gathering when you were in the Core Formation Realm.”
‘I was this close to being locked up for life,’ Tianyi thought.
“But we are getting off topic. What are you hiding?”
‘Damn, I thought she forgot about that.’ Tianyi glanced to the side. “Does it really matter?”
Mengfei gave a blunt yes. “Normally no, but since you feel it is information I should know, then I think I should know.”
Tianyi covered the lower half of his face. “Well, you see.”
Mengfei just stared at him, waiting expectantly. Sure, her expression remained impassive, but there was no disguising those inquiring eyes.
He rubbed his hair, messing up the perfectly combed strands of hair. Though, those strands automatically restored themselves to their previous state. Tianyi looked up and crossed his arms. He wanted to count each and every grain on the ceiling, but he couldn’t ignore Mengfei’s probing gaze.
Tianyi closed his eyes. “Mother, what do you think about reincarnated people?”
“Reincarnated people? No thought,” Mengfei said. “They are just people whose souls have undergone samsara and are reborn.”
“No, I’m talking about reincarnated people who kept their memories,” Tianyi said.
“Reincarnated people that kept their memories?” Mengfei repeated. Her eyes fluttered. “They are lucky. With another life and memories, they might gain things that they thought they couldn’t have in their previous life.”
Tianyi looked back down. It didn’t take a psychic to see into his mother’s thoughts. She likely wanted to be reincarnated into a new life and experience the love and care of a mother and father. “Say a mother gives birth to a reincarnated child. What do you think will happen? The child is not pure and is already stained. No matter how hard they try, they will never truly be that mother’s child.”
“That’s wrong,” Mengfei said, stopping Tianyi’s words. “Even if that child is a reincarnated person, that person will still be their child.”
“Do you really believe that?”
Tianyi stared into Mengfei’s eyes. Mengfei didn’t look away.
“What if I told you I’m someone that was reincarnated with memories?”
Mengfei didn’t answer for a second, and Tianyi’s heart tightened. His expression shifted, and pain spilled onto his face.
“So this is what it’s about,” Mengfei said. “You are someone with memories of the past. Then, do you not consider me your mother?”
“What?! No! I mean, yes!” Tianyi said. “I consider you my mother.”
“I don’t see the problem. As long as you came from my belly and you consider me your mother, why aren’t you my son?” Mengfei asked.
“Because, because,” Tianyi started. “Isn’t it unnatural? I still have another mom.”
“But you consider me your mother.”
“…yes,” Tianyi said. He slumped in his chair and showed a sullen expression. Perhaps this was the best outcome? But he didn’t feel satisfied. It felt like Mengfei didn’t comprehend the true gravity of what his reincarnation meant.
Mengfei stood up and walked toward the forlorn Tianyi. She placed her hand on Tianyi’s shoulder and lowered her posture until she could hug him. Her head lay gently on his. “I don’t know what you are worried about, but I have always considered you my son. Your memories won’t change that. The bond we forged isn’t so flimsy that you having memories will change that. Will it?”
Tianyi started to shake his head, but because Mengfei’s head was against his, he stopped. “…no.”
The two spent a moment of silence together. Tianyi should have been satisfied, but he wasn’t. “What if it was another reincarnated person? Would he be your son?”
“You are not the first son I had,” Mengfei said.
“What?” Tianyi snapped his head toward Mengfei, regardless of their position. He had another sibling, an older brother? Why didn’t he know?
Mengfei gazed up at the garden out the window. Her eyes weren’t focused, as if seeing another world. “It doesn’t apply to you, but for an extremity immortal to ascend to an origin immortal, we must dream. Dream about our counterparts in other timelines.”
“In some timelines, my Emperor-Father and Consort-Mother were never together, so I was never born. In others, they lost the battle for the throne and my Emperor-Father remained a Prince of the First Rank. Consort-mother became a side consort, not a noble consort. Still, I wasn’t loved.” Mengfei paused. “I’m saying nonsense. This doesn’t matter.”
Tianyi placed his palms over Mengfei’s hand, causing her to still. Her brows trembled, but she still continued looking out the window.
“Most timelines, history played exactly the same. I was found by my Master and brought to the Buzhou Immortal Sect,” Mengfei said. “I grew, I cultivated, and became Xi Mengfei, the Sword Empress. And just like I experienced many times, I wandered into a lower-ranked realm and met that man. Because of that brief interaction, I became pregnant.”
Tianyi perked up his ears. Despite himself, he still grew curious about his sperm donor’s identity. Still, he was destined to not succeed.
“My belly grew bigger until he was born. Because of the dragon’s cry I heard during his birth, I called him Xi Longyi,” Mengfei said.
Tianyi stilled. He recalled his experience in the ruin of the Immortal Court after the Three Heavens Connection Gathering. There, he had met his alternate timeline counterpart and learned about his action, and how they tied to Daoyi and Lei Jingye.
“I didn’t know his true identity at the time. I just knew that he was different. Despite trying my best to raise him, I made a lot of mistakes. Luckily, a few elders came to help, but they all gave up soon after, citing Xi Longyi’s character,” Mengfei said. “Longyi didn’t need care or help after a few years. I tried my best to treat him as my son, but he always felt annoyed with my presence, so I did my best to disappear from his sight.”
“Although I disappeared, I still did my best to care for him. I gave him everything he ever wanted, and I cleaned up any trouble he caused,” Mengfei said. “However, I always felt a disconnect. I wanted him as my son, but Longyi didn’t.”
“I watched everything he did, all his atrocities. I eventually learned that he was a Dragon Emperor clone, but I did not report it.” Mengfei paused. “I think the Buzhou Immortal Sect knew, but stayed silent in respect for me. Eventually, he started to undergo his Immortal Ascension Heavenly Tribulation. I had a feeling that if he succeeded, everything would go wrong, so I intervened. I slew the boy who came out of my belly with my own hands.”
Tianyi turned silent as he recalled the scene. Although he had seen it all, heard it from Mengfei’s mouth with any fluctuation in her tone, he had a feeling that she wasn’t as calm as she appeared.
“Surprisingly, I didn’t feel as much pain in my heart as I thought I would. Instead, I only felt a void in my chest.” Mengfei hugged Tianyi closer. “I began to wonder if I was like my Emperor-Father and Consort-Mother. Is that why they didn’t love me?”
Mengfei shook her head. “I didn’t have time to think because I saw another figure after I killed Longyi.”
Tianyi sensed.
“He looked remarkably like you,” Mengfei said. “I thought it was my imagination at the time, so I forgot about it. After killing him with my own two hands, my counterpart disappeared from that timeline. I continued to experience the lives of my other counterparts. I gave birth many times, yet they all ended the same, no matter what I did.”
“I expected the same to happen to you,” Mengfei said, finally looking at Tianyi. “When you were born, I hoped you would turn out differently, but I didn’t get my hopes up. I was wrong.”
“You are my son, nothing you say or anyone says can change that,” Mengfei said. “Your past life’s memories won’t change that, and even if your mom comes for you, I will still be your mother. No matter what.”
Tianyi’s head became white. He didn’t know how to respond, he could only stare at Mengfei.
“Yi’er, are you okay?” Mengfei suddenly asked as she brought out a handkerchief and wiped his face. It was only at this time that Tianyi realized that he was crying. “Crying and smiling at the same time, is something wrong?”
He laughed. Tianyi laughed at the worry in Mengfei’s voice. “No, it’s a good thing. Nothing’s wrong.”
Without waiting for Mengfei to respond, he engulfed her in a bear hug. “Me too. Even if I have two memories, you will always be my mother. No matter what.”