Use Me Like A Drug (omegaverse bl)-Chapter 198: So pull me closer

Yujun’s POV

I should...

"I want to tell you everything, but I want you to promise that you won’t do anything foolish" I finally say and the alpha gets up from my lap.

The weight of the alpha’s head is still on my lap even though he is not and I keep my eyes on him, monitoring his reaction, and trying to be careful not to break the softness between us.

He keeps his head bowed and through our bond, I feel him struggling with his temper, struggling to keep himself from losing control, and even though he’s trying his best, it’s still upsetting for me.

"Jaehyun" I call his name with a whine, "I’m sorry, fuck...I’m...I don’t want to lose my temper over him, I just really hate him" he says and sighs, trying to relieve some of the anger and I nod.

Maybe I shouldn’t tell him.

’Alphha needs to know’ my omega says and as if he heard me, Jaehyun speaks softly.

"I really want to know what I missed when I lost you" he says slowly without lifting his head, "it kills me that I walked out on you when you needed me the most" he says and I see clearly.

He hasn’t been asking about Jaehyun out of pride, he hasn’t been asking for any other reason but guilt...

"Jaehyun" I call his name softly, but he still doesn’t lift his head.

The sun is starting to set, casting a soft light on him, he looks soft and beautiful under the orange light, nothing like the alpha under the moonlight that spilled red blood on white snow.

He sighs softly and I hear the sniffle.

"Jaehyun, we both did it to ourselves...I walked out on you first" I say and he shakes his head side to side, "I shouldn’t have given up...I shouldn’t have stepped back, you were carrying our baby, and you were all alone in that place" he says.

"You respected me enough to listen to what I asked for, that makes me love you even more" I say and he looks up at me for the first time, his eyes are stained with the red glow of his alpha peeking through, "do you get it?" I ask.

"Chan didn’t, he played with my mind" I say and Jaehyun drops his head again, not wanting to look at me.

"He is a mad man, he...he knows how much I want this baby and uses my pup against me" I say and the alpha’s scent rapidly turns acidic, I turn my head to the side and keep on talking.

"He lies, he controls, he thinks he’s a god...and maybe he is, Jaehyun, he runs his pack like a cult" I say, rushing the words to get them out of the way so that we can get it over with and move on.

"He’s a born alpha and he used his alpha voice on me, he is almost indestructible and has planned everything out" I say, Jaehyun gets up and without words, he walks a small distance away from me.

My omega whines at the space between us but I can also feel his alpha’s biting rage...I know it’s only a fraction I can feel but now I see why he goes mad.

The sound of the waves rolling and the birds calling fills the silence between us.

"Come back to me" I say and he grabs his hair but doesn’t make any attempt to come back to me, "Jaehyun, come back to me" I order and he looks at me with his eyes completely red before coming back to me.

"It doesn’t matter, he is not here, he won’t..." I stop myself from saying more, because I know it’s a lie, he still has power over me.

Kang Chan’s last alpha voice command is still in me, holding me like a strong leash and I can’t do anything about it for now, "Yujun, I can feel your guilt" Jaehyun says and it’s my turn to bow my head.

"Fuck, I really want to make him hurt for hurting you, I want to see what patterns his brain would make on concrete" Jaehyun growls, he sounds purely animalistic, borderline insane.

"You won’t do anything like that" I say softly and open my arms to call him back to him and he obeys fully this time, kneeling to hug my body to his.

"Nothing will ever get between us again" he says and I nod my head, I hope so, I wish I can be confident like he is...but I have experienced Chan and he hasn’t.

"We will be fine, I have chosen you and I will keep choosing you like this" I say, burying my fingers in his hair, it feels even thicker to the touch, and I pull his head to kiss him.

It feels good to finally tell him what made us fight.

There’s still a lot to cover but this first step I have taken means the world to me, I can trust my alpha, I feel his anger slightly cool as our lips meet in a soft kiss.

I open my mouth as his lips mold mine in a slow kiss, something slow and beautiful, he breaks the kiss and nose at my jaw.

"What do you want for your birthday?" he asks and I hum softly.

What can I possibly want? He has made all my dreams come true, my family no longer chokes me, my baby sister has the home we’ve only dreamt of, I am unapologetically omega now and best of all...I have Jaehyun and our daughter.

"I have everything I need; you’ve given it all to me" I say.

"Just say anything...anything, and I’ll do it" he says and I moan as he kisses the shell of my ear.

"Make love to me" I say and he groans, "fuck" he curses, the anger is still there but love, want and desire is bigger than it.

"Right here" I add and he captures my lips again for a heated kiss, his hand holding the back of my neck.

My scent grows with the depth of the kiss and we both moan.

The new closeness between us amplifies everything...I love him.