You Will Only Be Mine-Chapter 470: Cruise

"Ethaaaaan! How have you been?" I said, quickly turning around and trying to put some distance between us. "So about yesterday..."

"You ignored your training and decided to get in contact with my wife," he said in the same tone. His eyes were looking past me, and I couldn’t help but feel a shiver go down my spine. "I don’t know if you think this is some sort of joke that is going on,n but if you plan on letting everyone you care about die before your eyes, go on."

"I know what you m- "

"How long would you want to make excuses? You did nothing but waste your time last night. The time you could have spent honing your craft, you decided to spend it talking to Sarah and getting no results out of it. You didn’t even fully think it through. How do you wish to save anyone if you can’t even keep yourself alive?" his scolding didn’t end, and I shut my mouth. "You’re lucky my hands are tied, and I don’t have anyone else to take your place. Otherwise, you would have been exiled from the plan right away."

I stood there, staring at him. "I’m sorry," I muttered.

"Can’t even get to talk to me properly now, sigh. When will you start taking this seriously?" he rubbed his forehead.

"But I am- "

"Then what made you think skipping training yesterday was a good idea?!" he cut me off, closing the distance and looming over me. His huge stature was towering over mine, and I couldn’t see any anger in his eyes. "You disappoint me, boy."

His words were cold and without a filter. I wanted to argue, bring up things that might help my case, or even explain anything, but no matter what I thought, I couldn’t call that anything else but an excuse. I was going to make excuses for myself to get myself out of trouble. I wasn’t even ready to deal with the consequences of my actions, and the figure who stood before me could rip me apart for this mistake, but the fact that his demeanour says he doesn’t even want to waste energy on doing that hurts way more.

"There are different ways to get a man motivated and have a stern form of discipline, so I wonder, what fuels you, boy?" he asked me, but I couldn’t open my mouth to reply. "I don’t have all day."

I racked my brain for an answer; there were plenty of reasons, but I couldn’t decide what to bring up first. I wanted to survive this, I wanted to keep everyone safe, I wanted to find a cure for Ai’s condition, I wanted Natsumi-san to be able to rely on me more, and I wanted to be the one whom everyone can trust with their matters. So many reasons yet nothing came out of my mouth.

"You don’t have the resolve in you, I see."

That’s not it.

"No reason whatsoever."

You’re wrong.

"You want to keep being in the safety of those stronger than you."

No, I don’t want to.

"Let them die a death that isn’t going to change anything."

That is not what it means.

"I bet you don’t even want to save them."

You don’t know that.

"Just use them for your own good and ditch them when they are useless."

Shut up.

"I don’t know if you are a coward or a genius for that."

Shut up.

"Maybe I should start taking lessons from you."

Shut up.

"So why don’t you teach me how to be utterly useless?"

SHUT UP!

I clenched my fist and aimed it at his chin, which he dodged without an issue, still looking down at me. Twisting my body, I aimed a hook at his obliques, which connected with him, but nothing happened. I stared as this man stood there without even the slightest of bent made in his figure. His feet didn’t shift in the slightest, nor did anything about him show that my punch did anything to him.

"That was a pathetic punch. Do you even know how to fight a vampire?"

I grabbed his side and grew out my nails, trying to dig into his flesh, but it felt like I hit an iron wall. They couldn’t even emerge properly and pushed my hand away from his body. Just what on earth is this man even made out of?

"Can’t even dig into my flesh. What makes you think you are capable of killing the man who hurt you and your little lover?"

"Shut up!" I ended up shouting and aimed a punch at his face, which he took without flinching. All that anger and effort put into it, and I can’t even make a scratch on this man. I’m breathless, and my hand now hurts, but he stands there without the slightest sign of any discomfort shown anywhere.

"Do you now see what I mean?" he said, pushing my hand aside with no effort. "This is the level you will keep being if you are not going to be serious about it. I don’t enjoy torturing you or using you as my personal punching bag. I am way above such emotions at this point. All I need you to be is strong enough to put my wife to rest and punish the man who is defiling her rest."

"I thought I was serious enough about it," I said, catching my breath and calming myself down.

"No, you are just doing what you are being told. You think you are doing it because that is what you want to do, but right now, you are nothing more than an obedient dog who can’t think for himself. You have the drive to do things, but you don’t utilize it. Am I making myself clear?" he said, and I couldn’t help but still question his understanding of my actions.

"How do you expect me to think I am not putting my all when I had that bastard hurt Ai?" I replied, looking away from him.

"Feeling certain emotions and saying you will do something is a lot different from putting in the effort yourself without being needed to be told so. I’ve seen men have their entire families slaughtered before their eyes and yell about how they will make the person pay, but end up either dead or stuck in their own delusion," he said, putting some distance between us and taking off his coat. "Do you want to end up like them?"

"Absolutely not," I said without any hesitation.

"Then why don’t you show me what that resolution of yours looks like now. Are you all words or will you actually go the extra length without needing someone to drag you to do that?" he said, standing before me with his arms held behind his back. "Fear not, I will not be the one attacking you tonight, so don’t even think about holding back. Put in your all."

I rushed at him with my arms clenched, and right as I was about to get in the range to punch him, summoned my sword and slashed at him, which made him jump back. He smirked and taunted me to try my best, so I leaped, thrusting the blade at his heart, which he caught between his nails. I tried my hardest to push through to get past his nails, but it felt like I was trying to move against an immovable wall.

"How are you so damn strong?" I complained and pulled my sword away.

"A millennium teaches you a lot more than you would think," he said, and standing right where he was and charged at it again.

"You’re so weak, I am almost surprised," he said as I lay down on my back, panting for air. "At a point, I started to have pity on you, so I slowed down, and even then you couldn’t land a hit on me."

"You did that on purpose? Man, I thought I tired you out," I said between breaths and looked at the black ceiling. "That must have been like what? Ten hours at least? How on earth am I not awake yet?"

"You just chose not to," he said, and I looked at him, confused. I stared at him until it finally hit me.

"Right, MY dreamscape. Forgot that. Doesn’t that mean you can be weak here if I decide it so?"

"Do you absolutely believe me to be weak?"

"You have a point," I said and sat up. Looking down, I saw the white light entering the place. Took your sweet time, me. Well, I did plan to land at least one hit on him. "Thanks for today, Ethan."

"Thank me when you actually achieve something," he said, putting his coat back on. "Get stronger, boy. Everyone needs you to."

At his cue, I got pulled down into the endless pit as my eyes opened up. I grabbed my head as I felt a little ache in it and turned to my side, finding two orbs of red and green staring at me. When did she start waking up before me?

"Ai?" I muttered her name and felt her lightly shudder. Oh no, what did I do in the time that I don’t remember? "Hey, wait. I’m normal, everything is fine."

I quickly closed the distance between us and held her tightly. She didn’t show any sort of fear aside from that one moment, but even that broke me on the inside. I need to get this thing under control. For everyone’s sake.

Ethan meant what he said. I don’t have to get stronger just for me to be able to do what I want. People depend on me being able to get strong. I need to be strong enough to save them and not be a threat to them at the same time. I can’t keep going on like this. Just holding her like this made that feeling multiply by a thousand times. I looked down and saw her staring at me with a relieved look on her face.

I’m thirsty.

"Is it okay?" I asked, and she tilted her head to the side, exposing her neck. I bent lower and started to slowly drink from her.

I can’t keep going on like this.

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