Chapter 18: Chapter 18: I Don’t Want Him, Either

Mei Wanying had been rescued in time, but she had still caught a chill. Lying in bed, she was listless and utterly lacking in energy.

The kitchen sent over freshly stewed fish soup, but she didn’t touch a single bite.

Ding Xiang tried to coax her by saying Pei Yan had sent it especially for her, but that didn’t cheer Mei Wanying up either.

In fact, it only made her more averse to it.

She ordered that nothing related to Pei Yan be brought before her.

She was still ill; who would dare disobey her?

Mrs. Mei had someone take the fish soup away.

Her sweet and charming little girl had been tormented by this marriage affair to the point where she’d lost all her vitality.

Watching her, Mrs. Mei felt a pain in her heart like a needle piercing it. She truly regretted her actions.

She shouldn’t have pushed her daughter out there, using such a method to force Pei Yan to compromise.

It had been a truly stupid plan.

Ah Yin had paid a heavy price, and as for Pei Yan... Mrs. Mei now understood. Even if he married Ah Yin, he wouldn’t let her have a good life.

He had said it himself—he didn’t like being schemed against.

Pei Yan’s attitude was resolute; he wasn’t just saying it for show.

He would definitely take action and strike back at them!

If Ah Yin married him, she would just be jumping into another fiery pit.

With Pei Yan’s status, his rear courtyard would not be short of women.

With her father no longer there to support her and being despised by Pei Yan, her situation in the Prince Chen Mansion might not be that different from being in the Eastern Palace.

The Empress would also be displeased with Ah Yin and might even make things difficult for her.

The more Mrs. Mei thought about it, the more she regretted it.

How could she have been so foolish? Switching Pei Yan’s drink to the strongest liquor and then having Ah Yin deliver the sobering soup!

Grasping Mei Wanying’s hand, Mrs. Mei apologized to her.

"Mother was wrong. I won’t ever force you again. Don’t do anything foolish. If something happened to you, Mother couldn’t go on living."

At this sorrowful thought, tears streamed down Mrs. Mei’s aged face.

She truly hadn’t expected Ah Yin to be so resistant to marrying Pei Yan.

After all, her previous wish had been to share a mutual love with Pei Yan and walk hand-in-hand with him for life.

If her daughter hadn’t liked Pei Yan, she certainly wouldn’t have fanned the flames.

But it was useless to say anything now.

She didn’t dare force her daughter anymore; she couldn’t bear to see her so lifeless again.

It was like having her heart gouged out!

Mei Wanying didn’t speak. She sat propped up against the headboard, her eyelids lowered, her thoughts hidden.

Mrs. Mei opened her mouth, but in the end, all that came out was a sigh.

"The Crown Prince might have run into some urgent business. Mother heard from the steward that he left in a hurry and didn’t look pleased. That lake outing... it probably won’t happen now. So you can rest easy and focus on getting better."

Mei Wanying finally reacted. "Mother," she said, "I want to enter the palace to see the Empress."

’The Crown Prince requested an imperial edict for our marriage, but the Emperor and Empress neither agreed nor refused. Isn’t this just their way of testing our Mei family?’

’If I don’t know my place and insist on pestering Pei Yan, the Empress will shove me at the Crown Prince without a second thought.’

’For one thing, it would teach me a lesson.’

’For another, it would remove a stumbling block for her own son and make him happy.’ 𝘧𝘳𝘦ℯ𝓌𝘦𝒷𝘯𝑜𝑣𝘦𝓁.𝒸𝘰𝓂

’But if I’m sensible, then for my father’s sake, the Empress will show me some favor, even if it’s just for show.’

’Besides, treating the Mei family well would earn Pei Yan a good reputation.’

’Why wouldn’t she do it?’

’In the past, I was too stubborn. I knew the road ahead was fraught with hardship, yet I insisted on loving Pei Yan.’

’I couldn’t read the room, couldn’t weigh the political situation at court, and turned myself into a thorn in everyone’s side.’

’I brought all the consequences upon myself.’

Mrs. Mei’s tone was hesitant. "Mother went to the palace to plead with the Empress, but the Empress didn’t agree."

Mei Wanying’s lips curved. "She will."

’Because they were asking for different things.’

’Mother was asking for a marriage, for Pei Yan to shelter me from the storms of life and become my support for the rest of my days.’

’But I am asking to leave the Capital City.’

’As long as the Crown Prince isn’t hunting me down, the world is a vast place. There will always be a spot for me somewhere.’

’Mei Wanying has no official connection to the Crown Prince; she could just leave. But knowing his ways, the moment she walked out, he would just drag her back.’

’Only if a Noble from the palace steps forward, makes her stance clear, and restrains the Crown Prince can I leave the Capital City in peace.’

’As for whether the Crown Prince might become rebellious and make things even harder for me, I don’t want to overthink it.’

’I’ll cross that bridge when I come to it.’

’Hesitating and worrying only makes it harder on myself!’

As long as Mei Wanying focused on getting well, Mrs. Mei would agree to anything.

"First, focus on your recovery. Then Mother will send a request to the palace. For your father’s sake, the Empress won’t refuse to see you."

Mei Wanying hummed in agreement.

Having figured some things out, although she wasn’t well yet, her spirits were much better than before.

Mrs. Mei quietly breathed a sigh of relief.

She ordered Ding Xiang to bring a freshly stewed pigeon soup. "This soup will help drive out the chill. Drink some more."

Fearing she wouldn’t drink it, Mrs. Mei added, "Ah Yan only sent the fish."

Mei Wanying hummed in acknowledgment but said no more.

’However much she once liked Pei Yan was how much she now wanted to draw a clear line between them.’

’She wanted nothing to do with anything related to him.’

Mrs. Mei offered to feed her the soup personally, but Mei Wanying refused. "Mother, you should go back and rest."

Mrs. Mei’s heart was uneasy.

She didn’t know if her daughter was blaming her or was concerned for her health.

Nanny Liu, ever perceptive, took the porcelain bowl from Mrs. Mei’s hand. "Ying is just being a filial daughter, she doesn’t want you to tire yourself out. Let me feed her. You can just sit beside her and chat. After she finishes, we can return to the main house and let Ying get some proper rest."

Before Mrs. Mei could get lost in her sorrow, Nanny Liu had already dispersed her melancholic mood.

Mrs. Mei and Nanny Liu didn’t leave until Mei Wanying had finished her medicine.

"Ding Xiang."

"Miss." Ding Xiang hurried over, following Mei Wanying’s gaze toward the dressing table.

"What do you need?"

"The box."

Ding Xiang understood immediately.

There sat the young miss’s most treasured wooden box, which contained the coming-of-age gift from Prince Chen.

Although she didn’t know what Mei Wanying planned to do, Ding Xiang fetched it for her at once.

The box was carved from fine Dalbergia odorifera wood. Opening it revealed a magnificent golden hairpin inside.

Slender fingers, like the tips of scallions, gently lifted the golden hairpin.

Mei Wanying’s expression was dazed.

Her other hand touched her neck. A pulse throbbed there. She was still alive.

’Her last life had hurt so much.’

’Being Pei Yan’s wife was painful.’

’Being captured by the enemy, having to take her own life to preserve her honor and avoid putting Pei Yan in a difficult position... that was painful, too.’

Remembering the events of her past life, Mei Wanying’s heart churned.

Even breathing became difficult.

After a long moment, she firmly shut the box.

Mei Wanying got up and walked outside, carrying the box. Ding Xiang quickly draped a cloak over her to block the wind.

"Miss, where are you going?"

Mei Wanying didn’t answer, walking straight out of the courtyard and toward the gardens.

Her eyesight was poor; she couldn’t see the path clearly once the light grew dim. Even though a maid came running after her with a lantern, Mei Wanying still stumbled.

The box in her hand fell. She picked it back up, not even bothering with the dust that now coated the treasure she had once cherished so dearly.

In the rear garden was a large lotus pond, home to koi fish and flanked by a viewing pavilion.

Weeping willows lined the pond’s edge. A pleasant scene by day, it now seemed gloomy and cold.

Ding Xiang held tightly to Mei Wanying’s arm, terrified that her young miss would fall into the water again.

But she saw Mei Wanying toss the box without hesitation and immediately turn to walk back.

Ding Xiang glanced back. After a soft SPLASH, the box was gone.

"Miss, that was a gift from His Highness..."

Mei Wanying gave a light sneer. "The coming-of-age gift, I don’t want it anymore. And him... I don’t want him either."

’Pei Yan had never belonged to her anyway. Whether she wanted him or not, perhaps no one even cared.’