(Amaia)

I wake up with a scream.

Alnilam’s indifference seared into my soul, even in my dreams.

He had rejected me in the dream, drenching me in blinding pain, like my heart is being torn from my chest and eviscerated.

There is a flash. Bodies instantly move, comforting hands reach out to me.

"Amaia!" Rigel’s arms come around my waist, hugging me to himself. Mintaka’s hand holds mine while Alnitak tenderly touches my foot.

Even Zille flies in from his bird house and perches on my shoulder. Now, I know it’s Saiph, all four of them are here for me. His beak tenderly rubs on my cheek as I clutch my chest.

"We are here for you," Min’s soothing voice comes and I lean against Rigel, having no strength to fight them.

They didn’t listen when I told them I needed space but right now I am glad they are here.

Their combined comfort anchors me in this storm, my heart and soul carry.

"Did you see a nightmare?" Alnitak softly questions, worries so deep cling to his voice.

Barely, I nod at him. Zille slips from my shoulder and lands in my lap, snuggling with me.

The bond becomes alive with their concerns but it’s the one with Alnilam I am focused on.

Although the mindlink has gone static, he can’t control the bond we have established.

I feel his visceral soul-crushing anguish in every neuron of my body. Heightened, throes of profound despair surround me.

Alnilam’s indifference and despair have somehow always affected me more than others, and now that the bond has settled for both of us, the immeasurable agony he is going through is crushing me.

Sweat pours out of me in buckets and suddenly I can’t breathe.

"Something is happening, her breathing is getting ragged," Alnitak says in panic. Rigel’s lips I sense in my hair while his grip tightens.

Mintaka rubs my hand in frustration. "She is having a panic attack."

"Deep breaths, take in oxygen and hold for a few seconds before letting it out," Rigel guides me as if speaking from a personal experience.

I obey, but Alnilam’s angst and suffering burn me like dry hay.

My eyes find an extremely worried Alnitak and I desperately request.

"Check...on your brother...there is something wrong with him."

His worried expression moulds into a shocked one but he doesn’t argue or refuse. Turning to his twin he says.

"Take care of her. I will be right back." Giving my foot a soft caress, Alnitak gets up and disappears through the door.

Mintaka fetches me a glass of water while Rigel guides me to take large gulps of air in and take small sips.

They don’t fight or argue, and to my relief, they don’t even mention Alnilam, for which I am grateful to them.

Zille lets out a pained whine and rubs his body in my lap. My hands find and pat him. His presence calms me down.

My heartbeat slows a notch, but pain and agitation remain. Leaning against Rigel, I just close my eyes and try not to think about this fucked up situation.

Rigel’s shadows surround me like a velvety pillow, cushioning me, caressing my skin with its dense but gentle touch.

Like a single ray of peace, it slithers in my heart and soothes the raging storm. They lull me into drowsiness and then I feel it’s not only his shadows but Mintaka’s incubus too. Both of them carry this natural sedative lullaby effect and although it can be deadly for the enemies, it’s nothing but soothing for me.

Without knowing, I fall asleep nestled in Rigel’s arm, cocooned in their care and assurance.

When I wake up again, the morning rays of the sun are filtering in through the window. I am lying in my bed with Mintaka holding my hand while sleeping on a chair. Rigel and Saiph are gone, and water is running in the wash area. Kacir must be back to get ready for the day.

"Min!" Slowly I call out and reach with my hand to shuffle his ruby hair away from his handsome face.

He stirs and opens his gold-dusted eyes. "Hey! You good?" He asks, concerned and I nod.

The pain in my heart has reduced but it’s there like a pinch.

"Go get ready, we have sessions." I offer him a warm smile so he won’t worry.

Sitting up, he extends his arms upwards and stretches, letting out a huge yawn.

"Alnitak?" I ask, curious. A shadow of agony passes over Mintaka’s face.

"He is with Alnilam...we spoke through the mindlink."

The wound in my heart ruptures open. "Is he alright?"

Mintaka sighs. "I don’t know, the situation is so messed up and he has always been a closed book. He likes to bottle up his feelings and emotions. He only speaks to..." Mintaka’s eyes widen and he doesn’t finish his sentence.

I knew he was going to say Jamina but didn’t.

"We should get ready for the day." Quietly, I change the subject and he leaves the chair with a pained expression.

Giving me a warm kiss, Mintaka exits my room. I drag myself out of bed and take out my uniform from the cupboard.

Kacir comes out of the wash area, all dressed up and smiling.

"Good morning!" He enthusiastically greets, so blissfully oblivious of everything going on. That makes me content, at least there is someone who will be normal around me.

"Good morning! Let me get dressed and we head out."

"Sure!" He gives me a thumbs up before humming a cheerful tone under his breath and heading to vanity.

I head inside to take a bath and change. Once both of us are ready we head down to our session with Alnilam in the library.

My heart beats so freaking fast and sweat coats my palms.

Am I even ready to face him after what happened?

We enter the library and I try not to panic but I can’t sense him or see him as I take my seat. Others are gathering. Mintaka and Alnitak arrive soon and settle on both sides of me.

"Good morning, beautiful." Alnitak places a kiss on my temple and I turn my head to observe his agitated face.

Before I can ask him about Alnilam, Saiph’s heavy voice diverts my attention.

"Good morning! Due to some personal reasons, Professor Alnilam will be taking a few days off. I will be filling in his place."

My heart sinks as my eyes find Saiph who apologetically stares back at me.

Where has my mate gone?