SONIA’S POV

Ivy was finally sleeping. She wouldn’t tell me why she had acted as if the world was going to end due to Lorena poisoning herself. But thankfully, I was able to get her to sleep, her breathing evening out into soft, steady rhythms under the blanket I had tucked around her.

However, I couldn’t sleep. Daniel had gone to be with the Alpha. Moon was back in a room, after falling asleep.

It was way past midnight, and I was up, pacing about the living room. The wooden floorboards creaked softly under my bare feet with each step, the cool night air drifting in through the slightly open window and brushing against my skin.

I couldn’t seek comfort from my wolf, because no matter how much I called for her presence, she ignored me. The empty space where she usually resided felt like a hollow cave inside my chest.

She was missing, so was a core part of my memory. Yet, all I could think of was Ramon.

He had to be in terrible shape. I didn’t like Lorena. Since I awoke, every time her name was mentioned, I felt very odd—a sharp twist in my stomach, a prickling at the back of my neck, like my body was warning me of something I couldn’t quite remember.

Even though I felt great fear after Ivy told us she had poisoned herself, that fear was quickly replaced by a need to push her off my thoughts.

Regardless of these facts, she meant something to Ramon.

They were close, so he probably was hurting right now.

I wished I could go to him. To comfort him the way he had comforted me, with his strong arms around me and his warmth chasing away the cold.

But I had already read the handwriting on the wall. Everyone wanted me to remain a secret, for reasons I wasn’t sure of yet.

I walked to the living room window that directly faced the sky. The glass felt cool against my fingertips as I leaned closer. Looking up, I watched the stars shining bright against the dark velvet canvas of the night.

I would have loved to be one of those stars. To be so significant, yet unreachable. It was the best kind of life to live.

Being accessible made things complicated. You interact with so many people, and end up mixing energies. Some good, some bad, some that left scars you couldn’t see.

I was pretty sure my streak of ill luck came from someone I interacted with.

As I was deep in my head, my thoughts travelled to my mother. Her face was blurry in my memory, but the feeling of safety she left behind was clear.

I quickly turned around and fetched the book she left me from my room. The leather cover felt smooth and worn under my fingers, as if it had been read many times before.

Dragging a chair to the window side, I sat down, the wood creaking softly. This time, I didn’t overthink things. It was just a book that was meant to be read.

With this thought in mind, I opened the first Chapter.

Nothing was as I expected it to be. She had written these words in poems.

The first one was a poem about the heart, and how its greatest source of nutrients was true love.

For without love, our heart is nothing but a vessel. But with love, we make use of that vessel in its highest capacity.

I read those words out loud. To be honest, they sounded cringe at first, the language flowery and old-fashioned. But as I repeated them, something stirred inside me, a faint warmth in my chest.

There had to be more to it than just poems. It couldn’t be just—My thoughts silenced when I flipped the next page.

This was it. There was a reason she started with a poem. Because the next page listed all the ailments of the heart.

It wasn’t just a book about poems, it was a healing book.

My heart began to beat really fast, as I looked through it, my fingers tracing the elegant handwriting.

Perhaps, I could find something that would help with my absent wolf.

I wasn’t sure what Ivy had seen in the book before. But it wasn’t useless. It was perhaps the most important book I would ever read.

I stopped searching as my eyes caught a text.

It wasn’t on how to get one’s wolf back, or what could be the possible cause of a missing wolf. This was more about the brain. About memories, and how precious they were.

I could see it was the poetry part, so I swiftly turned the next page.

There it was. A solution for loss of memory.

I needed a trigger. Something so painful, my brain couldn’t help but remember.

Closing the book, I somersaulted into my head again, the pages still warm from my hands.

What could be that painful if I had already encountered near death?

As I asked myself that question, my eyes went to the side.

I noticed I had been trying my hardest not to look that way. Mostly because I’d see the cursed land.

"That’s it!" I muttered, jumping to my feet, the chair scraping against the floor.

"That’s what?" I heard behind me.

I whirled, and saw Ramon standing at the door.

I had been so deep in my head, I didn’t even hear him come in.

Throwing caution and comportment to the wind, I ran to him and jumped into his body.

He enveloped me fiercely, burying his head in me. His arms were strong and warm around my back, his scent, something uniquely him, wrapping around me like a blanket.

I welcomed his weight, just grateful to be able to comfort him the only way I could.

We stood in that position for a good five minutes, before he finally stepped away, his hands lingering on my waist.

"You should be asleep," he said in a reprimanding tone, though his eyes were soft.

"I heard about Lorena."

He looked up sharply, worry in his eyes. I wondered why. I wondered if something bad had happened.

"What did you hear?" He asked, his voice low.

"That she tried to kill herself? You must have been very worried," I said. "Is she okay now? If she isn’t, I could go look and see if I can do something about her state. I found—"

He drew me into his body again, stopping me before I could tell him about my mother’s book. His chest rose and fell against mine, his heartbeat strong and steady.

"Why are you so kind? What’s the end goal here?" He whispered, his breath warm against my hair.

"Nothing," I shook my head. "You comforted me. I just want to return the favour. That’s all."

"But why? How can you be so beautiful, and kind? It doesn’t make sense."

"It doesn’t have to make sense. But I think you need to rest. If you break down, you can’t give her your best version when she needs you the most."

"And you’re okay with that?"

I didn’t understand that question, and my raised brow proved that.

"You’re okay with me being there for Lorena in every way."

My heart squeezed, and for the second time, I caught a whiff of my wolf. But just as soon, she disappeared.

It finally made sense in my head. My memories were tied to the absence of my wolf.

Find my memories, reconnect with my wolf. And to do that, I needed to feel real pain.

Watching Ramon take care of Lorena would definitely help with that.

"I’m okay with that. Do what you have to do."

I stood on my toes and placed a gentle kiss on his lips.

But as I pulled away, he drew me back into his body, his hand cupping the back of my head.

"For the sake of comfort, let’s do that properly," he said, and bent my head to the side, his lips claiming mine with a hunger that made my knees weak.