My Apocalypse System Arrives 10 Years Early
Chapter 57 - 56: Cleaver Version of "Horse Race", and Another Warning
The technique for the ’horse-hoof sound’ was actually quite simple. You hold a cleaver in each hand. First, the right hand chops down once and lifts, then it chops a second time. As that second chop lands, the cleaver in your left hand must strike immediately after, the two sounds ringing out almost simultaneously.
Rhythm was the crucial part. The right hand had to maintain a continuous pace of twenty chops every five seconds, while the left hand coordinated with ten chops in the same timeframe. As the right hand chopped rapidly, the left hand would strike in perfect sync.
Of course, the speed could be increased, but the ratio had to be maintained—two chops from the right for every one from the left. The tempo would build from slow to fast, mimicking the sound of galloping hooves.
The reverse was also possible—two chops from the left and one from the right. But for most people, using the right hand as the lead was more convenient.
It sounded a bit complicated to explain, but it was far from simple to execute.
But who was Li Xiang?
A Tier One Transcendent, perhaps one of the most powerful masters in the world. He stood before the camera, prime pork shoulder and belly laid out on the cutting board. Still feeling the buzz from earlier, his twin cleavers moved like a furious tempest. At first, the sound was like a foal trotting lightly. Gradually, it deepened to a rumble, like dozens of warhorses charging at full speed. Finally, with the thunder of ten thousand stampeding horses, he actually performed a classic musical piece: "Galloping Horses."
The cleaver edition of "Galloping Horses."
An epic masterpiece meant for the erhu.
Especially the finale—the heart-pounding momentum of ten thousand stampeding horses seemed to almost materialize from the sound. It was even a cut above the version played by a master on an actual erhu.
Perhaps it lacked the musical finesse, but it surpassed the original in its Mental Realm and sheer presence.
This was the result of Li Xiang infusing his Breathing Technique and Body Techniques into the performance.
In some forms of National Martial Arts Boxing, there’s a concept called "Fist Intent." Inadvertently, Li Xiang had managed to strike forth the "True Intent" of the music.
Like flowing clouds and running water, a stampede of ten thousand horses, the surging of a celestial river, on and on without end...
With a loud CRACK—’Holy shit, the cutting board broke!’
The solid wood cutting board, a full three fingers thick, shattered into pieces. Minced meat sprayed across the table and floor—it was everywhere.
’What a waste!’ Li Xiang stood there, stunned.
Still, he had managed to finish the entire piece.
The video’s release left everyone stunned.
Likes and comments flooded in.
Fan: "Holy crap, that’s insane! He can actually play ’Galloping Horses’ with cleavers!"
"Brother Xiang, can you do it again? Please perform it on your next livestream, that was awesome!"
"Brother Xiang probably went out to buy a new cutting board, so he can’t play anymore, haha."
"It’s amazing, alright, but a little rough on the cutting boards!"
"All that wasted minced meat... this video had some high production costs."
...
Li Xiang didn’t go buy a new cutting board. Instead, he went to the woodshed and found a rather large tree stump. He had dug it up while chopping wood earlier. It had originally been an old willow tree growing by the river that had somehow fallen and died. Since the wood wasn’t valuable, Li Xiang had dug up the whole root ball, left it to air dry, and planned to use it for firewood in the winter.
Now, this large willow stump would be perfect for making a couple of new cutting boards.
Willow wood is relatively soft, not as sturdy as hardwood. It’s also not very water-resistant; it can’t be soaked for long periods or kept damp, or it will warp. For this reason, some believe it’s unsuitable for making cutting boards.
In reality, however, willow has some clear advantages as a cutting board. First, the wood is relatively light, making it easy to carry and use. Second, its grain is quite beautiful and can add a touch of Nature’s charm to the kitchen.
Most importantly, the wood has a fibrous, vertical grain. This means it’s less likely to shed splinters when you chop meat on it. In fact, many butcher blocks in restaurants are made from cross-sections of willow root.
Besides, it was rare to find a willow tree this thick.
Li Xiang sawed off two sections from the stump. First, he used his High-Density Blade to strip the bark. Then, he took a wood planer to smooth the edges into a roughly circular shape, after which he flattened and polished the surface.
Finally, he wrapped and tightened two bands of steel wire around the circumference of each board to ensure they wouldn’t split, even twisting the wire into a nice-looking loop for hanging.
As for the minced meat that had fallen on the floor earlier, he gathered it all up as a treat for Dahuang and Er Huang. The two dogs had been drooling ever since their master started chopping meat, but they knew the rules and had been waiting obediently outside.
While Li Xiang was performing "Galloping Horses" with his cleavers, the two dogs had listened in bewilderment. But when the cutting board shattered and meat flew everywhere, their eyes instantly lit up, and they leaped to their feet in excitement.
Li Xiang wasn’t a stingy person. With a fond curse and a laugh, he piled the minced meat high in their dog bowls.
"WOOF WOOF WOOF WOOF~" The two dogs could only express their gratitude in this way.
Next, Li Xiang went back to mincing meat, but he didn’t try to show off again—it was too destructive to the cutting boards. Besides, the video was already recorded and posted. He now focused on making the meatballs.
Once the meat was minced, he set it aside. Li Xiang finely chopped some scallions and ginger, then peeled, washed, and finely chopped some lotus root. Afterward, he combined the minced meat, scallions, ginger, and lotus root in a large bowl. He added a suitable amount of salt, light soy sauce, cooking wine, oyster sauce, chicken bouillon powder, and an egg, then mixed everything thoroughly until the filling became sticky and elastic.
He didn’t use flour, opting for steamed bun crumbs instead.
Adding steamed bun crumbs makes the meatballs fluffier and crispier, helps them stay that way longer, and gives them a better texture.
He tore the outer skin off a steamed bun and crumbled the soft inside into fine pieces. He then cut up some scallion segments and ginger slices, placed them in a small bowl with boiling water to soak for about ten minutes, and then set it aside to cool.
He then added this bowl of scallion-ginger-bun-infused water to the meat filling. This not only neutralized any undesirable meat odors and added fragrance but also made the filling exceptionally tender and juicy.
Grandma came over to help. She lit the stove and heated up the oil. Once the rapeseed oil in the wok was hot, she began shaping large meatballs and gently sliding them in. She fried them until they were golden-brown, crispy on the outside and tender on the inside, their aroma filling the air.
In addition to the pork meatballs, Li Xiang also made beef ones. He deep-fried all of them for easier preservation.
By the time they finished, it was nearly dinnertime. They made a simple meal of noodles with pork meatballs, beef meatballs, green vegetables, and egg. After adding some vinegar and chili, Li Xiang polished off an entire large basin of it.
’You have to eat noodles from a basin to really enjoy them.’ Grandma, however, only had a small bowl with three meatballs. At her age, she was afraid she wouldn’t be able to digest too much.
As she ate, Grandma watched Li Xiang devour the noodles from his basin, smiling cheerfully. She looked even happier than if she were the one eating.
’If I ever did mukbang streams, I’d probably be pretty good at it,’ Li Xiang thought. ’But I’d just get labeled a glutton, and that would ruin my handsome, dashing image. Better not.’
The feedback on his last video was incredible. In just half a day, before it even got dark, he had gained twenty to thirty thousand new followers. A good number of people had even sent him tips.
When he checked again the next morning—’Whoa.’ He had gained another twenty to thirty thousand followers overnight. His total count was now approaching 170,000.
Looking at all his enthusiastic followers, Li Xiang felt he had to give them a warning. If he didn’t know what was coming, that would be one thing. But since he did, he couldn’t bear the thought of people—especially his many fans from the south who rarely experienced such extreme weather—having their lives disrupted by the impending snow disaster.
Not to mention, once the heavy snow arrived and the severe weather lasted for over half a month, prices for everything would surely skyrocket. Stocking up now could save them a lot of money.
So, Li Xiang posted another short, one-minute video. In it, he claimed that by observing the heavens and the unusual behavior of the small animals on the mountain, he was predicting a massive blizzard in the south in the near future. He urged his followers to stock up on supplies to protect themselves against the cold and frost.
As for the north? If the south was getting a massive blizzard, it went without saying what the north would be in for.
After a moment’s thought, Li Xiang also made some calls to the county’s Meteorological Bureau and the Emergency Management Bureau.