ISEKAI? More like I See Crap!-Chapter 68: Hugs, Confusion, and Chaos ( )

One of the guards patted Hazuki on the back, grinning ear to ear.

"Man, this crazy guy keeps bringing us luck and extra income!"

Another guard nodded enthusiastically.

"Yeah! I say he should stay in this town longer!"

Hazuki twitched.

"I’m being exploited, aren’t I?"

The leader crossed his arms, smirking.

"No need to worry anymore, crazy guy. You won’t be ’taxed’ at the gate anymore. Just keep bringing us bad guys."

Hazuki blinked.

"Wait... really?"

The leader grinned.

"Yeah. Think of it as an ’honorary pass’ for being such a great contributor."

The guards all nodded.

"Yeah, yeah! Free entry for the town’s personal bad-guy magnet!"

Hazuki squinted.

"This still sounds like a scam..."

The leader pointed at one of his men.

"You, go tell the neighbors that the ’loud man’ has already been ’captured.’"

"Yes, sir!"

Hazuki felt relieved.

"Finally—"

Then—

The leader smirked at him.

"And crazy guy?"

"Y-Yes?"

The leader patted his shoulder.

"Thank you for the ’reward.’"

The leader raised his fist.

"Alright, boys! Drinks on me tonight!"

The guards cheered, raising their stolen—ahem—’earned’ pouches.

"WOOOOO!!!"

Hazuki facepalmed.

One of the guards grinned, flipping through another bounty list.

"Oh yeah, speaking of rewards..."

Hazuki raised an eyebrow.

"Huh? What now?"

The guard smirked.

"Even that recent assassin we captured—you know, the one you took down back when you were eating with that little lady?"

"What about him?"

The leader grinned.

"Well, turns out he had a huge bounty on his head too."

Hazuki blinked.

"Wait... you mean the one I casually stomped into a table?"

"Yep!"

The guards all chuckled.

"And guess what? The reward has already been processed."

Hazuki felt a bad premonition.

"W-Wait... that means—"

The leader clapped a hand on his shoulder.

"That means..."

The guards all grinned.

"THANKS FOR THE REWARD, CRAZY GUY!"

"Err... you’re welcome?"

The guards laughed as they split the bounty among themselves.

Inside Hazuki’s mind...

"Damn, this isekai... really crap! I’m not even getting isekai protagonist perks!"

As Hazuki grumbled internally, the leader smirked and clapped a firm hand on his shoulder.

"You know... if you really wanted a share of that reward..."

Hazuki perked up.

"Huh? Really? I can get my cut?!"

The leader’s grin widened.

"Yeah. You just need to come with us... to the office."

Hazuki’s body froze.

His mind raced.

"Wait. Office...?"

"That means... JAIL!!!"

"Ah! No need! No need at all!"

He waved his hands frantically.

"The whole reward goes to you! Really! Consider it my donation!"

The leader nodded in satisfaction.

"Alright, guys! You heard him, okay? ALL the rewards... go to me."

The guards burst into cheers.

"WOOOOO!!! LEADER, YOU’RE THE BEST!"

"DRINKS FOR A WHOLE WEEK!!!"

Hazuki felt like he just got legally scammed. Again. freeweɓnøvel.com

"I need to leave this town..."

As the guards finally left, laughing and celebrating their newfound wealth, Ellyn bowed politely toward them one last time.

Meanwhile—

Hazuki felt exhausted. He rubbed his face and sighed deeply.

"Damn these guards... Is this normal here?"

Ellyn tilted her head and smiled.

"Well... if you don’t want problems, then yes. But think of this as a first step."

Hazuki raised an eyebrow.

"First step? To what? Losing all my money?"

Ellyn giggled and shook her head.

"No, silly. After this, those guards will actually start covering for you."

Hazuki blinked.

"Huh? What do you mean?"

Ellyn grinned.

"Well, now that they’ve ’benefited’ from you, they’ll start looking the other way when you cause trouble."

She leaned closer and whispered.

"That means fewer fines, fewer questions, and if something happens, they’ll be the first ones to know."

Hazuki narrowed his eyes.

"So... you’re telling me that by getting scammed, I actually bought myself a VIP pass?"

Ellyn nodded. "Pretty much!"

Hazuki paused. Then he grinned. "Well... not bad!"

"Ellyn gently tugged on Hazuki’s hand.

"Uncle... let’s go back to sleep."

Hazuki yawned, stretching his arms.

"Umm... okay..."

Still half-asleep, he let Ellyn lead him inside the house.

Without even thinking—

He walked straight to the couch and collapsed onto it.

And just like that—

He fell asleep instantly.

Ellyn watched him for a moment, smiling softly.

"He was supposed to sleep outside, though..."

She giggled and pulled a blanket over him.

"Oh well..."

Ellyn stood beside the couch, watching Hazuki sleep peacefully.

She smiled mischievously.

Then—

She slowly climbed onto the couch, squeezing into the small space beside him.

Her ears twitched as she got comfortable, snuggling close.

"I can’t wait to see his reaction next morning~"

With that—

She closed her eyes and drifted off to sleep, completely content.

Tomorrow...

Would be fun.

Hazuki was deep in sleep, completely unaware of the world around him.

His arms instinctively wrapped around Ellyn.

Tightly.

Like a pillow.

Ellyn’s eyes widened, her ears twitching in pure panic.

"U-Uncle..."

Her whisper was barely audible, and her face turned red.

She wiggled slightly—but Hazuki’s grip only tightened.

He buried his face into her soft hair, completely oblivious.

Ellyn froze.

Her tail puffed up slightly.

"W-What do I do?!"

She peeked up at Hazuki’s face.

Completely knocked out.

Not even a single sign of waking up.

"Mou... this is unfair..."

Her ears twitched again.

She sighed softly, giving up.

"J-Just for tonight..."

After that,they both fell asleep.

In the next morning—

Hazuki slowly blinked awake, his mind still groggy.

Something felt... off.

He wasn’t on the veranda.

And—

Something warm.

Something soft.

Something... really comfortable.

His arms were wrapped around it.

Hazuki blinked again, still half-asleep.

He pulled the blanket down slightly to see what he was hugging.

"...Ellyn!?"

Ellyn was peacefully sleeping right next to him, nestled against his chest.

Hazuki’s brain took a full five seconds to process the situation.

"...EH!?"

His entire body froze.

His arms were STILL wrapped tightly around her.

His legs were tangled with hers.

Her ears twitched cutely as she mumbled in her sleep.

"Mmm... Uncle... warm..."

Hazuki’s soul nearly left his body.

"WHAT KIND OF TROUBLE DID I GET INTO THIS TIME!?!?"

His entire face turned red.

Ellyn’s eyes slowly fluttered open.

She yawned softly, stretching.

She looked up at Hazuki.

And smiled.

"Good morning, Uncle~"

Hazuki stared at Ellyn, his brain still struggling to understand what was happening.

"Why are you sleeping with me?! And—"

He looked around, confused.

"How the hell am I sleeping on the couch?!"

Ellyn rubbed her eyes, pretending to be innocent.

"Hmm? But Uncle, you’re the one who followed me inside and settled on the couch."

"B-But... But..."

Hazuki felt like he couldn’t find the right words.

Ellyn tilted her head, her ears twitching playfully.

"What are you so worried about?"

"Ugh!"

Hazuki gritted his teeth and looked away.

"It’s not like you did anything, right?"

"Y-Yeah... but..."

Ellyn let out a small sigh.

She snuggled right back into him, resting her head on his chest.

"Haa... Just let me sleep a little more..."

Hazuki froze.

"G-Get up!!"

Hazuki panicked, trying to move Ellyn away.

Ellyn tightened her hug.

"Mmm... Just let me sleep..."

"E-Elllllynnnn!!!"

Hazuki wiggled, trying to escape, but her grip was surprisingly strong.

Like a sleepy koala clinging to a tree.

"Oi! Stop treating me like a body pillow!!!"

Ellyn burrowed her face deeper into his chest.

"Noisy... let me sleep..."

Hazuki gritted his teeth.

"Y-You little—! What kind of beastkin are you?! A cat or a damn leech?!"

But—

Ellyn paid no mind.

She kept hugging Hazuki... and refused to let go.

( End Of Chapter )