Reincarnated Into A Dead Woman's Body In Another World-Chapter 126: Arc 3, - 36: The Choices I Have Made
’Even if I stay put this loop, it’ll probably end up resetting and I’ll end up remembering and any of you somehow dying, I can’t take this forever... But...’
In a split second, everything felt like time had stopped. "JOTOU WHAT ARE YOU DOING!?" Fumeko’s voice.
"JOTOU! NO!" Hotaru’s.
"Jotou!?" Asobi’s...
Her eyes closed, moving the sword to her neck. Then it hit her, all the memories of her life, this one and the one on Earth. The moments she shared with those who screamed her name in this very second.
Every loop she spent, every memory she made. Were those not real? ’Or am I just choosing to believe they aren’t real anymore... All of that is still true, just hasn’t happened.
An insight I should never have. Basically, a paranoiac given a glimpse of the future—multiple possible ones. I lived through every single one... This isn’t the way... I can’t just give up now, can I...?
It’s too hard, but when has life ever made it easy? Only when I keep trying... I, I want to see those moments again...
Even if they’ll hate me for trying to kill myself in this moment... I need to stop making this a solution... Shit... It’s too late. I’ve already pushed the sword...’
In the momentary second, the armite blade made contact with her skin, a layer of spark came in between, like it was pushing the blade away from her neck and against the force of her hands. ’Huh? Wait, why- Why didn’t it pierce my neck?’
Before Jotou could finish her thought- "WOOSH!" A shadow reappeared onto Jotou, pushing her onto the ground. "THUD!" The blonde fell on her head.
Fumeko grappled the sword out of her hands and—"CLANG! Tang! Ting...!"—threw it away. Fumeko sat on top the fallen blonde, glaring back at Jotou after throwing the sword aside.
"Ow..." Jotou groaned, the end of her thick ponytail softening at least a bit of her fall.
But she was not given a breather. Two hands grabbed Jotou’s wrists and slammed it above the blonde’s head. Fumeko used all her weight to keep Jotou down, pressing Jotou’s wrists onto the floor.
Jotou winced, facing up as dark brown hair fell down like a curtain over her. She stared up into pools of tears and anger, fusing into despair. Fumeko furrowed her brows, breathing heavily on top of her.
Hotaru put her hands out, as if trying to ease the tension in the room, "Meko... Get, get off of her..." a quiver in the redhead’s voice. Sheer shock made tears out of her brilliant blue eyes.
"Not until," Fumeko raised Jotou’s wrists and—"THUD!"—slammed them onto the floor again, making sure she secured Jotou onto the ground as Jotou grunted a second time.
"She promises me, NOT TO PULL SOMETHING SO STUPID LIKE THAT AGAIN!" her nose sniffled, but her eyes barely blinked glaring at the blonde.
’Why...?’ "Why... did you stop me?" Jotou’s voice was hardly a whisper, "Is it some human morality that won’t allow you to?"
Jotou’s eyes half-closed, her blonde brows just resting, as she stared up to Fumeko holding her down, knowing she could throw her aside like a pillow, "Would you just feel guilty if you didn’t?" her words began to sting...
The grip around Jotou’s wrists tightened and tightened, Fumeko’s knees pushed the blonde down, tensing... "What?" Her head shook slightly, "Because I care for you..."
"After I said what had happened. After I said I couldn’t save you from death, three whole times. And I gave up after the fourth, crying like a child in the sand, not knowing what to do. I thought you’d hate me."
Jotou’s gaze paused, watching Fumeko intently... Almost as if Fumeko’s falling tears fell directly into the blonde’s eyes. "I told you..." Fumeko sobbed and sniffled.
Jotou looked to her left, to see Hotaru, nearly frozen in place. In the redhead’s palms were drops of glowing water she had not dissipated yet.
"You know this... I told you how I felt..." Fumeko’s throat clogged between every word, whispering to avoid the other two hearing.
Jotou glanced to Asobi, fingers wrapped around her wand so tightly it might break. Down her cheeks were waterfalls of rainbows...
"I’m not going to let you do that to yourself. I, I don’t know what you need to hear, but there’s a lot of things on your mind. And we can talk about it all; eating delicious food watching the clouds.
We can’t do that if you’re gone. You’re clever, you try and succeed no matter how much pain you face and I like the way we bicker and tease each other.
You think I wouldn’t try and stop you? Don’t lose your confidence. I get that you’ve seen me dead, us dead, but I won’t let you just give up! You’ve saved me before.
We’ve had months of meals together and so many adventures. You became the Thundering Blade and you’ve done so much. If I hadn’t met you...
So why would I not save you...? I can’t... I can’t imagine my life without you," Fumeko’s hands that held Jotou down were rattling by the end—tears falling down.
Jotou peered to the brunette holding her down; a purple headband and her first friend here... The detective sobbing her heart out—her detective.
Jotou’s gaze became a little clearer; her eyelids drooped less. ’Why does that sound so familiar? I-I said something similar to get Fumeko out of that fire... I, I get it...’
"Your eyes did that before... Rainbows when you cry," Jotou uttered to Asobi. The elf stared in response... Unsure of what to say as she gripped her wand tighter.
Jotou sighed, "It may be by an orchestrated plot, some act of magic or just coincidence I met all of you. But my life is intertwined with all of you, whether I like it or not.
I thought ending myself would just be it... but I’d be selfish; leaving all the scars for you all to bare," Jotou muttered.
"What are you babbling about?" Fumeko wept.
Jotou sighed again, looking up to Fumeko, "Looks like this outcome wasn’t the best either... I care for you too. All three of you," Jotou stated. Fumeko’s eyes widened.
"I promise not to do something so stupid again. Easy way out doesn’t mean correct, right?" Jotou continued, "Now, get off of me please."
Fumeko did not budge, watching and staring for a few seconds... Till her head fell and she hugged Jotou. Jotou could hear her light whimpering cries right next to her ear.
Shadows went over the brunette as Fumeko stood elsewhere in the blink of an eye. She stared out the window, wiping her face with her own sleeves.
Hotaru’s footsteps rushed across the wood, falling onto her knees as Jotou tried to get up. Hotaru held Jotou by the back of the head and at her torso, keeping her steady.
Jotou sat up, feeling Hotaru’s hands hold her up. The hand on her back disappeared before Jotou’s lips were clasped by Hotaru’s hand; it was wet.
Jotou’s eyes darted with furrowed brows to the redhead. "Drink, just drink," Hotaru still had tear marks down her cheeks. 𝕗𝐫𝐞𝕖𝕨𝐞𝗯𝚗𝕠𝘃𝐞𝚕.𝐜𝗼𝚖
With the hand on the back of Jotou’s head and on her mouth; this was not a ’request’. Jotou calmed, opening her mouth to let Hotaru feed water into her. She could feel the rejuvenate spell going down her throat.
Hotaru let go, then checked Jotou’s temperature. Jotou kept silent, letting Hotaru do what she wanted like a doctor’s appointment.
Without warning, Jotou felt a head fall onto her shoulder. Both arms wrapped around her, the redhead continuously hugged Jotou on her knees, the crimson ears folding under her chin. Another sigh left Jotou’s lungs.
Another pair of footsteps; Asobi knelt down right in front of Jotou. Jotou looked directly at the elf, feeling Hotaru still hugging her one side.
Asobi brought her wand up to Jotou’s face. Colourful lights cheered faintly, like doodling a pen over her skin. "There," Asobi brought her wand down, having done the blonde’s makeup, "Good as new," she smiled.
Jotou smiled back softly, the magician still teary-eyed as rainbow hues left the jade of her eyes. Jotou cautiously wriggled a hand out from Hotaru’s hug.
She reached the hand for Asobi’s face, wiping away the rainbow tears as the elf closed her eyes. The rainbow hue disappeared on her fingers, like a chemistry experiment changing colour.
"Please," Asobi took the hand Jotou held out, "Don’t do that Jotou... I promise to do a show everyday to keep you happy, okay?" she beamed.
"I won’t... And you don’t have to do that. Seeing you happy is enough. I’m sorry to make you worry; all of you worry. And thank you." ’These are my friends. This is my home in this world. I need to trust them more.’
After taking a moment, Jotou was allowed to stand up, wiping the slight tears in her own eyes. She readjusted her ponytail that was ruffled against the floor.
"Okay... About the headaches, the circle of grass, Asobi’s magic, the minister, all my theories; I’m gonna need all the help I can get. I have a lot of things to explain," Jotou took a deep breath.
"You better," Fumeko glared, her arms crossed.
