Please get me out of this BL novel...I'm straight!
Chapter 601: ’I’m Going To Miss You.’
"And rejecting him," Drizelous added, his voice barely above a whisper, "might actually be hurting you more than the idea of trying with him again."
"Are you alright?"
The question made Florian flinch—not because it startled him, but because of who had asked it.
Slowly, he lifted his head.
"I'm alright, Your Majesty," Florian replied quietly, careful not to meet Heinz's eyes. He could feel Heinz's gaze on him anyway, steady and searching, like it had been there for far longer than Florian wanted to acknowledge.
They had been standing side by side for hours now, fulfilling their duties. 𝓯𝓻𝒆𝙚𝒘𝓮𝙗𝓷𝒐𝓿𝙚𝒍.𝙘𝓸𝙢
Saying goodbye to visiting kingdoms. Escorting departing nobles. Smiling when required.
Mira and Camilla had already returned to their respective kingdoms. Bridget had chosen to stay for her education, and Athena and Scarlett remained in the palace as well—uncertain of their next steps, but welcomed all the same.
Heinz had made that much clear.
'For whatever reason, he's trying to be generous. I wonder why.' Florian thought, though there was no bitterness in it this time.
Just tired awareness.
Now, they were waiting for the final delegation to leave the palace grounds. After that, it would be the dukes' turn.
Which meant Florian would be leaving too.
The realization sat heavy in his chest.
Despite standing so close to each other, Heinz and Florian hadn't spoken—not really. No private words.
No arguments. No apologies. Just distance wrapped in politeness.
Until now.
"You're leaving today," Heinz said casually, as if he were commenting on the weather.
"Yes," Florian answered just as simply.
"And you're taking Hendrix with you," Heinz continued. "Why?"
Florian paused.
'Wow. He really isn't beating around the bush,' he thought.
But then he noticed something else.
There was no sharpness in Heinz's tone. No anger. No accusation like how he expected.
Which meant Heinz had either spent a long time calming himself before asking…
Or he had tried not to ask at all—and finally failed.
Florian already had an answer prepared. He'd known the question would come sooner or later.
"Prince Hendrix has been—more or less—confirmed not to be the savior," Florian said evenly. "And he's been trying to get closer to me for reasons that are… unclear. I want to understand why." He finally glanced at Heinz. "It's obvious he has his own plans. I'm simply doing my job to assist you."
The words came out smoothly.
Too smoothly.
It was a lie.
Well. Not entirely.
Florian did want answers from Hendrix—but not for the reasons he'd just given. He wanted Hendrix's help, and he already knew how to get it. He just couldn't do it inside Diamond Palace.
'Heinz has eyes everywhere,' Florian thought.
Much like Hendrix, who could seemingly appear the moment his name was spoken.
Florian knew it wouldn't take long for Heinz to realize something was being planned behind his back. That was why these four days mattered. Why he needed distance. Space. Silence.
And yes—it would probably push the brothers even further apart. Monica had wanted Hendrix closer to Heinz, wanted the feud between her sons to end.
Florian felt guilty about that.
But for once, he had to be selfish.
'Just get through this,' he told himself. 'Don't let him suspect anything.'
He exhaled slowly.
'And speaking of Heinz… he hasn't said anything in—'
"I'm going to miss you."
Florian froze.
His heart skipped, sharp and sudden, like he'd been struck somewhere tender.
He wanted to snap. To tell Heinz to stop saying things like that so casually. To get angry, to remind him that he'd already drawn a line between them.
However—
"Perhaps the reason you're still hesitating," Drizelous' voice echoed gently in his mind, "is because part of you does want to give him a chance."
Florian hesitated.
And God—no matter how much he wanted to deny it—
The words clung to him, refused to let go. Out of all the opinions he'd heard, all the advice given to him, those were the ones that followed him out of his room and into the palace halls.
'Focus,' Florian told himself. 'This week matters.'
He forced his thoughts away from Heinz—away from the pull in his chest, away from everything he felt but refused to name—and toward what awaited him. The task Elara had given him. The answers he needed.
And the growing certainty that whatever he was about to uncover—
It was tied to Farah's disappearance.
That truth should have been enough.
It should have anchored him.
But fuck—no matter how hard Florian tried to keep his mind on the trip, on the mission, on everything that actually mattered—
He turned back to Heinz.
Heinz was already looking at him.
Not with expectation. Not with pressure. Just… softly. Like he always did when he thought Florian wasn't paying attention.
Florian's fingers curled into tight fists at his sides.
"I—" The word slipped out before he could stop it.
He wanted to say he would miss him.
The realization hit harder than he expected.
'Why do I want to say that?'
For some reason—quiet, terrifying, undeniable—he realized he wasn't angry anymore.
And that scared him.
Because hating Heinz had been easier. Cleaner. It gave him something solid to stand on.
But now?
He wanted to hate him.
He needed to hate him.
And yet—he couldn't.
'This is the problem,' Florian thought, his chest aching.
Florian found himself starting to consider Drizelous' words.
'Maybe he's right,' a quiet part of him whispered.
But he pushed the thought away immediately.
Not now. Not yet.
Not when he hadn't even been given the chance to do what he needed to do—to find his way back to his own body, to return the original Florian to his life, to make sure that when that happened… it would be a happier ending than the one left behind.
'I can't afford to think about us right now,' he told himself.
He swallowed the words he almost said, forcing them back down, even as his heart stubbornly refused to harden.
But—
There was one thing he had to say.
"I…" Florian began, his voice quieter than he expected. "I would like to talk to you again once I get back." He lifted his gaze, finally meeting Heinz's eyes. "I acknowledge that after everything—after every new piece of information we both found out that night, and the night after that—" He paused, drew in a deep breath. "Our emotions are high."
He steadied himself.
"This trip will be good for us," Florian continued. "To have space. To think. About the future ahead."
"Florian…" Heinz said, clearly taken aback. His eyes widened, as if he hadn't expected those words at all.
"So please," Florian added quickly, before he could lose his nerve, "whatever happens—don't suddenly show up. And please respect this trip. I—"
"Your Majesty. Your Highness."
Lucius' sudden voice cut through the moment, making Florian jump despite himself.
"The Thornfield family are about to come out."