#Chapter 41 Goodbye, Nathan

Rachel POV

Rachel & Bella’s Apartment

"Are you okay? Did he hurt you?" 𝙛𝓻𝒆𝓮𝒘𝙚𝙗𝒏𝙤𝙫𝓮𝒍.𝓬𝒐𝙢

I didn’t have a chance to catch my breath as I was pulled into the apartment by Nathan Lewis. He held my upper arms in his grasp with a tightness I couldn’t begin to fight against. I couldn’t understand his terror. We were newly reacquainted and I had broken his heart when I’d ended our relationship three years earlier. Why was he so affected over a brief abduction?

"No, no, no! It was Tyler. He’d never hurt me," I tried to explain until Nathan shook me to silence me.

Hard.

He shook me so hard my teeth rattled and my brain banged around in my skull making my head ache.

"You have no idea what he’s capable of, Rachel! He’s spent years flaunting his affairs with other women while you, his fated mate, sits alone at home. What kind of wolf can do that? He rejected you in anger. He doesn’t even want your child!"

Nothing Nathan was saying could be called a lie. He was reporting facts available to anyone in the general public from the Society pages of the newspaper. I even remembered an interview in which he had told the reporter he never intended to have children as they were too much of a distraction from his work.

Oddly enough, Nathan wasn’t making me doubt Tyler more---exactly the opposite was happening, in fact, as I began to wonder why Nathan was so desperate to disillusion me towards my former mate. Why would he want to stir up a fight in me? Was he so worried I would go back to Tyler?

Most people would presume a fated mate should return to their other half. Wolfen society was based around the mating system. I couldn’t imagine a world in which wolves were encouraged to betray their mates.

I tried and failed to come up with any reason Nathan would benefit from me remaining estranged from Tyler.

I didn’t have a fortune to inherit. Nathan didn’t need money anyway as his own family was rich. I was already pregnant so he couldn’t want to breed with me. He was young and healthy; Nathan didn’t need to steal another Alpha’s child when he could sire his own. I couldn’t even offer him fame because I was only just bursting onto the music scene.

What did Nathan hope to gain from being with me? What could being with me gain him?

I really couldn’t think of anything I offered to make me a particular catch for matehood.

"Why are you so upset? I was only gone maybe a couple of hours at best. He didn’t leave a mark on me. Tyler only wanted to talk and he’s never been very good at taking no for an answer. He took me with him to make it easier on himself, not because he was planning to scare you all to death. When did you even get here?"

Nathan gentled his grip on my arms, rubbing them briskly as he seemed to pull himself back under control. He searched my face for---something, I didn’t know what, as he spoke.

"Bella called to say you’d been grabbed. I was already in my car. I drove straight here. I figured it was Tyler. He has the most to lose if he doesn’t get you back. I’ve heard some disturbing things lately, Rachel. Did you know he can force you back into a mating with him?"

Forced matings were something out of bodice ripper books written to appeal to teenage girls who had more passion than sense. No one forced a mating in this day and age. The Alpha Council could, would, and did issue sanctions if their laws were not upheld. Tyler would face worse from the Council than from a human court.

"What would he gain from trying to force me into a mating with him? My wolf is sleeping. Even if Rayne was awake, my pregnancy prevents me from shifting. He couldn’t finish the matebond."

"He could if he forced a blood exchange," Nathan stated grimly, his hands moving to grip mine, "That’s why you need to marry me, Rachel. We can declare for each other right now. Go before the Alpha Council with my parents as our witnesses. I’ll declare you my luna, you’ll be inducted into Full Moon Pack, and Tyler Wright will never be able to threaten you again."

"I’m pregnant, Nathan! What about the baby?"

Everything Nathan was saying sounded as if it were coming from the deepest fantasies in my heart. I wanted to believe him. I wanted to believe in him more than I wanted to believe in the possibility of world peace.

"He or she will be the next heir to House Lewis. You’re carrying an Alpha child. If we do a blood exchange, they’ll be as much my child as Tyler Wright’s and I guarantee I’ll be a better father than him."

Nathan shrugged a shoulder as if we were agreeing on the type of linen to put on the table for dinner. He had not paused a second at the idea of my child inheriting his family line. It was a move of such fantastic selflessness I couldn’t bring myself to believe in it.

Squeezing Nathan’s hands, I asked, "Do you realize I might not be able to have another child? This would be the only child of your line. You are an only child, Nathan. What will your parents think? How will they feel? I might not get my wolf back either. If Rayne doesn’t wake up, I won’t be able to share the full moon with you. Ever. Can you imagine the kind of half-life you’ll be forced to live with a crippled wife?"

"I will be a blessed man. I am my parents’ only child and they love me enough for ten children. They will love our child because they’ll know the child has Lewis blood in them from the blood exchange in our mating ceremony."

I felt warm all over as Nathan raised my hands to kiss my fingers. His lips were warm and soft, but they didn’t make my blood boil in my veins the way it did when Tyler kissed me in the backseat of his sedan.

"I don’t want to wait, Rachel. Let’s do this now, right now! We can’t wait for Tyler to decide to come steal you again. I can’t risk losing you again."

I asked Tyler if he had ever really had me---but I knew now it was Nathan Lewis who had never had me.

We had been children, playing at love, when we dated in high school. Our kisses were fond memories, but they stirred no deep passion in me. Even now, I couldn’t feel anything other than gratitude and fondness for Nathan in spite of the fact he was telling me everything a woman in my position should want to hear.

"No, Nathan. I rushed into my first mating. I’m not rushing into another one. If I choose to mate again, I want it to be because it’s impossible for me to live without my next mate, not because I’m trying to protect myself from what might happen if I don’t do it."

"Are you serious? Rachel, don’t be so quick to push this offer aside. I swear I’m being honest with you. We will be happy together. Our child will be loved. I don’t care if you can’t have another child or if you never shift again. You belong with me! You always have. Can’t you see? Fate is giving me a second chance with you."

How was all of this suddenly about Nathan?

My skin prickled with the certainty he wasn’t interested in what I wanted or had to say. For all the things I admired about him, Nathan Lewis was still an Alpha and I had cast him aside long before I’d rejected my Alpha mate. His pride alone must have been stung to be put aside.

"I think you need to leave for now, Nathan."

I tried to pull my hands away from him only to have his grip tighten painfully on my fingers. The bones ground together as he tried to hold me while I tried to get free.

"Don’t tell me to leave, Rachel. I can’t protect you if I’m not here."

"I don’t need protection in my own home."

"Tyler just stole you out of your own home," Nathan pointed out, his voice tinged with anger in a way I’d never heard it before.

"Tyler borrowed me from my home and brought me back to it unharmed. You’re hurting me."

He let go of my hands and I dropped them to my sides, wiping them on my clothes self-consciously.

I couldn’t believe I had ever wanted him to hold me or touch me or kiss me. I didn’t feel any of the heat with him I felt with Tyler. I just wanted him to leave before all my positive feelings toward him turned dark.

Nathan spoke through gritted teeth as he said, "You’re going to regret this, Rachel."

In a way, I knew he was right, but I also knew I didn’t have a choice except to send him away.

Nathan Lewis was not the right choice for my future no matter what sweet nothings he whispered into my ear.

"Maybe, but it’ll be a decision I made on my own and I’ll take the chance of regret over falling into line like a sheep any day. Goodbye, Nathan."

"Goodbye for now, Rachel."

He left and I gasped, finally able to breathe again freely for the first time since I’d walked into the apartment.