"She actually kissed Su Xi first! Ohoho, this is gonna be good. I thought his girlfriend was Jessica Alba? Did they break up?"

"Even though it was dumb of Su Xi to provoke guys like James and Marbury, I have to admit, he’s bringing glory to our nation when it comes to picking girlfriends. His skill at landing foreign babes is way, way better than Yao Ming’s."

"Yao Ming is just too straight-laced. Besides, if Yao was standing there, that pretty girl couldn’t kiss him even if she jumped."

"Oh, that girl is Scarlett Johansson. Another Hollywood starlet, and she’s one of the really famous up-and-comers, a top leading lady of the new generation. Su Xi is the man! First, he bags a world-class beauty like Jessica Alba, and now he’s got a rising star throwing herself at him. What a legend!"

"I have to give Su Xi props. As a James fan, I admit that when it comes to pulling women, he’s light-years ahead of the Little Emperor, James. That’s also the *only* thing he has on the Little Emperor."

"@ a few posts up, what century are you living in? What Little Emperor? If James is as great as you claim, where’s his ’super’ quadruple-double? And why were the Knights fourth in the East before Su Xi left, but now they’re struggling to even hold on to the eighth spot?"

"The ’Little Emperor’ nickname is about his dominance on the court. You people have no idea how popular James is in the United States. The entire American basketball scene thinks he’s the heir to Jordan’s throne. In America, nobody is even talking about Su Xi becoming a superstar. He’s just a role player. It’s nothing like James’s ball-dominant, carry-the-team style. All you guys ever bring up is that one quadruple-double."

"So where’s James’s quadruple-double?"

"..."

The war of words raged on.

In both American basketball circles and on Chinese forums, the names Su Xi and James had become a combination guaranteed to start an argument.

On the team bus, James sighed. He was jealous of Su Xi’s luck with women. But he figured this was a good thing. Su Xi was two-timing, and with two famous actresses, no less. The entertainment media would have a field day with him.

His on-court image was about to be ruined. The sports media hates players with a lot of tabloid drama; it’s a clear sign they aren’t focused on the game.

Hmph!

’He can’t keep it in his pants.’

’His popularity will evaporate sooner or later.’

’And he wants to be an All-Star?’

’Dream on.’

As James thought this, his mood brightened.

Although, beneath that pleasure, there was still a hint of envy. What basketball player... doesn’t dream of a gorgeous woman throwing herself into his arms?

Even a regular guy playing pickup ball at a campus court hopes a pretty girl on the sidelines will notice his athletic moves. Whenever a beautiful woman comes to watch, everyone instantly gets maxed-out ’skill’ and ’stamina’ buffs. And after making a nice shot, they’ll casually strike a cool pose in her direction.

Su Xi wasn’t thinking about any of that.

He rubbed his lower lip as he returned to the bench. Bender immediately sidled up, wrapping a long arm around Su Xi’s neck. "Jack! Jack! Let me get a whiff of that movie star smell..."

The guy leaned in and started sniffing... Su Xi shoved him away.

"You don’t think about basketball at all, do you? All you think about is this weird-ass shit," Su Xi criticized.

Bender just chuckled, not at all offended. He didn’t have that thuggish vibe like Garnett, and he didn’t like donuts. He just enjoyed being a bit of a weirdo.

Nearby, the "hairstyle artist" Pollard couldn’t help but ask, "Jack, break it down for me. Why don’t my looks make movie stars throw themselves at me? We’re about on the same level, appearance-wise."

Pollard was being completely serious. He wasn’t joking.

Su Xi patted "Jim Carrey" on the shoulder. "Coach, you want to take this one?"

Carlisle glanced at the game. The Pacers were up by 13, and the Knicks were a complete mess. He turned back, satisfied, and said to Pollard, "The root of your problem is that you don’t exude enough sex appeal on the court. And why is that? It’s because you’re not as completely immersed in the game as Jack is."

"With women, you can’t attract them with flashy, external displays. You have to draw them in with subtlety, with restraint, with focus... In other words, between you and a woman, only one of you is allowed to think you’re the hot one."

"I know this is a bit deep. Are you following me?" Carlisle asked, completely deadpan.

Hearing this, Su Xi was filled with a sudden, profound respect.

He’d always thought Carlisle was a pretty serious guy. Who would have thought...

Su Xi had the urge to peel back Carlisle’s skin just to see if it was actually Jim Carrey in a suit.

Scott Polard looked like he’d had an epiphany. "I think I’m starting to get it. Thanks, Coach. This is the first time you’ve ever truly impressed me."

"You’re welcome, Scott."

Carlisle nodded, displaying his talent as a deadpan comedian.

’And you say you’re not Jim Carrey.’

Su Xi shot Carlisle a look.

Carlisle turned back to the court. The Pacers were now up by 16.

...