We return home a few hours to dawn.

Crack open several cans of beer and put on a romcom to watch. To act normal like we did not just do what we did. John Tucker must die is an amazing comedic movie. But it wasn’t enough to clear away what we did from my mind.

"It was so much easier than I imagined. Getting rid of Nate." Annie remarks somewhere along the movie. I throw a glance at her, and then drank out of my beer. She seems as normal as me. Or at least she is trying to be. "It won’t be easy on our conscience though. Especially yours." I answer.

"I am fine with that."

I didn’t know when I fell asleep and woke up when it was bright the next morning.

Going into the very same kitchen to get breakfast was a little difficult—mentally. But I managed as I was so hungry. The dead are gone. The living must go on. Annie did not feel like eating so I only made a bowl of cereal which I left halfway because I did not find the appetite to finish it. Much later, I realized that I had turned off my phone last night because my mom’s calls were incessant and distracting. Turning it on, I see a barrage of messages. Several missed calls from mom. Others from Raymond and texts from Neil. Seeing him asking how I was and saying I should reply so we could meet at this restaurant that we both know. You can say I am a little thankful to him for getting me out of this PTSD sappiness with his damn texts. I am feeling mad to say the least. He is acting like what he did wrong was merely putting aside a promise to have dinner with me to spend time with his friends and stay out so late.

I blocked his new number and went around with my personal activities. Hours later, Annie suggested that we should go get groceries. We were not out of groceries. It was her way of saying we should go for a drive to get ourselves out of that space a little. She brings up moving to a new place and I instantly rebuffed the idea. Moving at around the same time Nate Knightley is found missing would be suspicious. Annie is going to be listed as a suspect given her rough history with him. And judging from the text in Nate’s phone between him and his wife shows that she knows that he was in New York for business. She is going to know that he is missing sooner or later.

At work, I had began shunning Raymond. Laurel notices because anything hardly ever gets past her and she was incredibly eager to know what was going on. I told her nothing was wrong. Raymond and his matters were never my business. It only looked like that for a moment—and maybe it was.

By the end of the day, I have gotten something to deal with other than. . . . you know—ptsd shit. I thought the reason mother was relentless with her calls was because she wants to intercede still on Neil’s behalf so I did not answer. I eventually decided to pick up to tell her to stop blowing up my phone.

But what I heard her say was soul-shattering. Percy, my little brother has had leukemia for a while now, apparently. And she and dad kept it from my knowledge because they did not want me to worry and thought that they could handle it themselves. I am so mad at her for keeping such a huge thing from me. Percy is my only sibling and I love and adore him so much more than I will ever do her.

I filled in a redundant emergency leave of absence from work to travel over to Florida the next day to see his condition for myself. It was worse than mother had said to me about on the phone. I had held myself together not to cry in front of him in his ward. He had been living in the hospital for months now.

No matter how much I look at him, I no longer see the nearly chubby kid I saw when I visited for last year’s thanksgiving. He is now lean and unrecognizable. His sun-streaked hair that is a little long and flops over his forehead which maks him look particularly cute, that I always tease that girls would go crazy crushing on him over is now gone. In its place is a bald head. The situation had gotten too bad. It is now in the final stage. The extensive chemotherapy that he had been going through did little to nothing to curb the growth of the cancerous cells. "They are growing rapidly. His cells are getting weaker. At this stage, surgery is the only way to save him. But even at that, we cannot be fully certain that it would go well. You have to prepare for the worse." That was what his doctor said. The bone marrow transplant surgery costs five hundred thousand dollars. As well as an extra fifty thousand to be put ahead on the waiting list for a bone marrow donor because there are a whole lot of people with the same illness and in dire need of a bone marrow transplant.

I settled the waiting list and a little more basic treatment with the sixty thousand dollars in my savings account. Promising I would try to get some of the surgery fee on time so Percy can get it. "Hey buddy. You are going to have to be strong now. We will do all we can to make sure you get you get better. All you have to do to help us is try and fight it okay?" I said to him in a fake cheerful tone. He brings his head down with a downcast look, fiddling with his fingers. His lips are quivering. He is thinking whether or not to say something. "What is it bud?"

"I feel like such a bad kid." He sniffles.

"Mother’s wrists are getting sorer, but she still insists on working at the massage parlor. Saying she is okay. Dad was due to retire this year. But he is pushing it back because the pension money would not be enough to cover all the medical expenses. And you are the type who silently suffers aand says everything is okay when it isn’t. You all are suffering because of me." He sniffles.

"Stop crying. Don’t I always tell you that big boys don’t cry? You are letting down the boyhood." I hug him when he couldn’t stop crying. Percy is just ten years old. But he has the insights and thoughtfulness that most adults do not.

ANNIE POV

"Leukemia!" I exclaim, unceremoniously putting down the egg whisker I was using on the counter surface. I am surprise I didn’t also do that to the eggs I am whisking in the bowl. I remove the phone that I kept trapped between my ear and shoulder. "Oh my god. That shit is really bad!" I say to Gweneth on the phone.

"I know." She draws in a shaky breath. I know her well enough to know that she is close to shedding physical tears now even though she is holding them back. "It is a lot more than my mom told me. I am still having a hard time digesting it."

"Yeah, me too." I say even though I don’t feel it as much as her. Truth is I don’t feel it all. It is not like it is herself in that condition. I am more concerned over the fact that I will be staying alone in this house tonight and maybe tomorrow and the day after that as well because she most probably will not be returning anytime soon.

"Well, what can I do to help?" I ask.

"No, you don’t really have to. It is my burden. You are also dealing with a lot as well. Your art showcase is coming up."

"Yes, you’re right. The damn showcase is just three days away and I am going crazy sugaring and greasing palms of old, greedy hags to attend so it won’t seem like a failure, because I am getting the feeling that it is heading in that unpleasant direction." I huff at the end of my complaint. "Are you my bestie or a clone of hers? I never thought I would hear you gruff about the art that you love so much." She teases playfully. So I kept it going. "Yeah. It seems I was created to be a whore that is made to lose long-term interest in anything other than fine abs and dicks. Don’t you think I should just throw it all away and find a miserable lovesick rich guy who will take care of my rosy ass for life?"

"I don’t think that is a bad idea." 𝐟𝕣𝕖𝐞𝐰𝕖𝚋𝐧𝗼𝚟𝐞𝕝.𝗰𝐨𝐦

"I know right? We could then kill him and bury his body in some ditch in the Antarctica and live as wealthy bitches for the rest of our lives!!"