(Amaia)

The aftermath of Jamina’s death hits everyone hard. A special ceremony is held in the Academy in her remembrance where Headmaster Fallon, other professors and recruits from Guild Serpen give speeches.

We light candles and pay homage to her by singing her favourite songs.

Strangely, Alnilam doesn’t attend the ceremony. I hardly see him anymore apart from the sessions.

Cristo sits beside me and appears heartbroken. Jamina was not only his Guildmaster but also his favourite professor. His eyes are swollen red from crying.

"I still can’t believe she is gone," he sniffles. Alnitak pats his back while I hold back my tears.

"None of us can."

After the ceremony, Saiph is announced as the new Guildmaster of House Serpen. A new professor who was also Alnilam and Jamina’s guildmate and fought with them during the battle is hired for "Chemistry and Biology of Elixirs."

Professor Karna Azriath. She has a dark vibe about her, completely different from Jamina’s easy-going and vibrant self.

I wonder what she will be like but no one wants to talk about her, at least for now.

All of us sit together in the Common Room after the ceremony, reserved for all guilds.

Cristo and Luthial join us.

"I never thought such a day would come when someone like Professor Astride would be taken away from us. She was the best of the best." Cristo places his chin on his bent legs.

Mintaka lies in my lap while my back is flushed against Alnitak’s chest. Slowly I weave my fingers through Mintaka’s soft red hair. He has grown quiet again, but he stays by my side, and I shower him with as much affection as I can so he won’t spiral.

"Life is so unpredictable...that’s why I did something," Luthial quietly says, leaning back against the sofa.

Everyone becomes attentive to his words.

"What did you do?" Rahria asks, lying in Kacir’s lap just like Mintaka is in mine.

"I asked Larissa to be my girlfriend and she said yes," he tells us with a shy smile.

Finally, some good news. The common room erupts with congratulations.

The boys do high-fives with him while I smile.

"I am so happy for you, Luthial. You truly deserve her."

Luthial takes a bow at my words. "Yes, she is one of a kind."

"I wish I could find my mate too if she is out there somewhere," Cristo sighs.

"Maybe she is sleeping and is too tired to wake up and find you," Alnitak teases and everyone half-heartedly smiles.

We have forgotten to smile after her passing.

Cristo and Luthial soon leave. The five of us remain behind.

"Has anyone spoken to Sir Alnilam?" Rahria asks, concerned.

"He is not speaking to anyone. Just needs space for now and we are respecting his privacy," Mintaka tells her.

Rahria and Kacir still don’t know that Alnilam and Saiph are also my mates.

"I can’t even imagine losing someone so close. Sir Alnilam has always been closed off but now he is completely shut down."

Rahria’s words make me realise that in all the time I have known Alnilam I have never seen him smile. Not even once.

Yes, his facial muscles relax at times, especially when he roasts one of us but that smile has always been missing.

After this tragedy, I wonder if I will ever see him smiling.

"He blames himself for her death, especially how she died saving him. Saiph and Zabiel gave us the details of the fight," Alnitak says, while his fingers slowly weave through my hair.

"It’s not going to be easy. This death will weigh on all of us." Kacir leans in and places a soft kiss on Rahria’s hair.

All of us agree with him.

***

Everything seems like a dream for the next few weeks. Time passes slowly, and the cold has blanketed Orion, making activities sluggish and dull. A melancholy has spread through the academy.

But with Saiph in charge of our physical activities and the Inter-Guild Wars coming up, no one can relax much.

Saiph puts all of us through immense training, making us grind and sweat until we forget to breathe.

Alnilam on the other hand, keeps himself shut in his office after taking our sessions. Even during them, he doesn’t speak much or glance in my direction, ever.

I know his decision regarding me hasn’t changed but I am just thankful he isn’t bringing that up lately.

"Amaia stay back," he quietly says one day. "I need to speak with you."

Twins pass looks but I assure them to go.

Once everyone has left Alnilam faces me. There are dark circles under his eyes and I am not even sure when the last time this man slept.

"Saiph and I spoke about the Tarian situation." So this is what it was about. I know Saiph has informed him what Rigel did.

"The Werewolf Council contacted me and said that someone unseen kidnapped Tarian and brutally murdered him. We both know that it was Ezran."

Quietly, I nod at him.

"I am not going to rat him out. Ezran is part of Orion so we are going to pretend we don’t know what happened to Tarian. If someone asks, you are not aware. Clear."

"Yes and thank you for guarding his secret."

"Ezran took the oath to protect you. He was chosen with us. I will never hand him over and jeopardise your safety. Besides, Tarian was going to rot in a cell till the end of his time. Seems like it came early for him."

Alnilam is not as mad as I had anticipated him to be after learning this truth. Or maybe his moral compass is shifting after Jamina, he is becoming rigid. There is an unseen wall between us which I am unable to climb or push down.

"I didn’t want him to die like that..."

"You don’t always get your wishes. His Chapter is closed and we will not speak about him again," he says with finality.

I linger after his small speech, watching him with concern. My fingers intercross, nipping the urge to touch him.

"You can go now, we are done here."

The pain radiates in my chest but quietly I leave, closing the door behind me.