≫ A perfect depiction of humanity’s progress

Except now presented in real time

└ Teacher, the pace of civilization is way too slow

≫ Our boys are so consistent!

They never lost their初心!

└ Please lose it. I’m begging you

└ Hahahahahaha

└ I get stunned by how handsome they are and then the very next scene is them doing coconut distance throwing competitions, I genuinely don’t know how I’m supposed to reactㅠㅠ

≫ Didn’t Spark used to have a really competent image back during IAD?

What the hell happened in just a few months......

└ They’re good at things when someone tells them what to doㅋㅋㅋ This is what happens when nobody’s directing themㅠ

└ That’s because they left the brain members behind......

└ Honestly, at this point even the brain members would probably get assimilated if they went too

≫ Park Juu doesn’t look like it, but he’s ridiculously strongㅋㅋ The gap moe is real

└ Spark doesn’t have a single weak member physically

└ Just look at them

└ Not just strong either, they’re crazy strong. When I saw him split a coconut in half I got intimidated even through the screen. Leaving the gif here

└└ Forearms wow

└└└ Since we’re sharing good things, leaving his back muscles here too

└└└└ Back muscles wow

└└└└└ Aren’t rock vocalists supposed to be skinny sensitive pretty boys......? Since when did he become a sculpted muscle prince?

└└└└└└ Park Juu was always a sculpted muscle rock prince

≫ Guys, didn’t Kim Iwol yell at them for this?

└ Hahahahahaha

└ Judging from Kim Iwol’s BubblePop, he looked ready to pass out

└ I’m not even lying, there were three BubblePops per minute that day

≫ How one idol uses a branding iron:

Grilling banana slices

└ ???: Wow, it looks like a cafe dessert

└└ The banana brûlée would cryㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

└ It’s so funny how they were poking the firewood around and suddenly decided it’d be a waste to lose the heat so they started grilling bananas instead. They don’t waste a single bit of energy

└ The banana isn’t ripe yet -> then just force it to ripen

└└ The meaning of “ripen” feels a little different hereㅋㅋㅋ 𝘧𝘳𝘦ℯ𝓌𝘦𝒷𝘯𝑜𝑣𝘦𝓁.𝒸𝘰𝓂

Kang Giyeon, once the blue green apple boy from a blooming garden, became a rubber tree man of the rainforest. Park Juu, once the fairy of a winter lake, became the guardian of the Amazonian branding iron. Choi Jeho, master of the golden continent, became a tenant of a leaf house.

I’d sent them onto the show to freshen up their image, and instead they came back after completely obliterating it. All I could do was helplessly watch comparison clips between their music videos and variety appearances getting uploaded everywhere.

"Your eyes are gonna fall out."

Choi Jeho spoke to me after I’d spent the entire evening staring at monitors after work.

This little bastard. Was he seriously trying to pick a fight with me right now?

"Honestly, maybe that’d be better. At least then they’d get washed."

"If you’re sleepy, go to bed."

"I’m not sleepy."

"It’s one in the morning."

"And are you sleepy? After turning the team image into a natural history museum exhibit, you still have the nerve to say you’re tired?"

As the storm of scolding continued, the resting members slowly emerged one by one.

"What kind of glory and wealth was I chasing when I put you on the golden continent? I should’ve just dumped water on you like usual and sent you out there. At least then people would’ve just called you some nature survival weirdo living by a stream."

"Hyung, are you crying?"

Lee Cheonghyeon helped me up from where I’d collapsed onto the floor.

Your hyung isn’t crying. Your image is still intact, at least. Seongbin’s already doomed even though he never even went to the island....... As long as you survive this, hyung will be okay.

"But isn’t it fine since it’s not exactly a bad image......?"

"If you idiots had actually created a bad image, I would’ve locked you in the practice room for three months. Be grateful you’re still walking free."

Park Juu quietly shut his mouth.

Juu, I trusted you, and this betrayal wounds me deeply. I cherish you, but this time I can’t take your side. Do not forgive my pettiness.

"What exactly did you catch in the ocean? No, wait. Leaking spoilers is absolutely unacceptable."

"Jeong Seongbin, take him into his room."

"Yes, hyung."

"Seongbin, are you seriously listening to Choi Jeho right in front of me? At a time when the team is in crisis?"

It was absurd. Jeong Seongbin himself had been sitting there watching his friends actively self destruct in real time, so how could he do this to me?

At this point, I almost started wondering whether I was the strange one.

Thankfully, it turned out they were the strange ones, not me. The footage that aired the following week thoroughly proved my anger had been justified.

『Giyeon: ?? Hyung, what did you catch?』

『Jeho: An octopus.』

『Juu: Don’t octopuses live in deep water......?』

『Giyeon: Doesn’t our team catch octopuses weirdly often?』

『Jeho: That’s because we’ve got a member whose nickname is octopus.』

『Juu: Does that somehow make sense......?』

Choi Jeho casually walked into the ocean and suddenly came back carrying a gigantic red octopus.......

『Juu: I think one of my clothes disappeared.......』

『Giyeon: Didn’t you put it in your bag?』

『PD: Apparently monkeys steal clothes around here all the time.』

『Juu: !』

『Just then, the eldest brother spots a prime suspect』

『Jeho: Is it that thing over there?』

『! Monkey theft incident !』

......As payment for consuming nature’s resources, the owners of the island confiscated their manufactured goods.

No wonder Park Juu had come back wearing a torn up vest instead of spare clothes. Why the hell did that monkey ignore the smoked food hanging openly nearby and steal someone’s clothes instead?

Oh right. The reason Park Juu’s clothes had holes in them was fully revealed too.

『Jeho: Park Juu, your clothes are on fire.』

They carefully slow roasted the fish because they wanted to smoke it properly, yet somehow managed to rapid heat their own clothes instead. Choi Jeho slammed Park Juu’s vest against the sand so aggressively that even the hidden embers looked ready to give up and die.

Watching Park Juu sit back down by the campfire drying fish while wearing a burnt vest made me sigh. The flames that had once been blazing fiercely enough to literally consume clothing all went out during the process of repositioning the fire.

One disaster after another. Bad situations piling onto worse ones. Endless suffering.

Still, the fortunate thing was that none of this stupidity ever felt frustrating to watch.

Those idiots genuinely ate well and slept well. If the fire went out, they simply spread empty bags over themselves and went to sleep anyway.

The moment they woke up, they’d start doing something again, and when it was time to eat, they’d fill their stomachs. Since their food stores kept overflowing, they looked like wealthy landowners thriving on a deserted island. Throughout the entire broadcast, the word “hunger” never once appeared.

≫ Watching them pile up mangoes and eat them somehow looks insanely powerful

They keep eating nonstop because they’re walking around all day anyway so they’re burning all the caloriesㅋㅋㅋ

└ The satisfaction from the sweetness of local fruit skyrocketing

└ This is a severe sugar high situation

└ Hahahahahaha

≫ They’re definitely not the sharp competent type, but somehow the more you watch them the more you go “wow......”

Why is that?

└ It’s just...... they survive too well. Feels like they’d genuinely keep living there forever if you told them to

└ No, come back before Kim Iwol’s stress kills him

≫ An idol personally proving that a workhorse can survive on its own as long as you feed it rice

└ They didn’t even give the workhorse rice in this household

└ Milady, I don’t even need rice, just please give me clothes

The number one reason people reacted this way was their sheer easygoingness.

≫ Since they themselves aren’t stressed, watching them feels less exhausting

Even when their clothes get stolen or the house sucks, they just go “well, we’ll survive somehow~ as long as we can sleep~” and move on, so instead of feeling cruel it just feels like watching a chaotic adventure

The mango explodes? Then they just walk farther and look for something elseㅇㅇ They never blame anyone or make the atmosphere tense over little things

└ Maybe it’s because they’re not the type to complain much about situations

└ It’s definitely not forced positivity, but they weirdly do feel positive somehow

└ Optimistic......?

└ Yeah, exactly like that comment above

They’d all lie packed together inside the tiny hut, one crawling outside because it was too hot, another rolling out because it was too cramped, and yet every morning all three of them woke up looking refreshed. They praised each other over trivial things and treated mistakes like no big deal.

That was why these three on the deserted island felt “peaceful.”

『Giyeon: Should we play Truth Game?』

『Juu: I’ve never lied to the members though.......』

『Giyeon: No, it’s not that I don’t trust you, hyung!』

And on top of that, viewers noticed the subtle teamwork and atmosphere between the members.

『Jeho: Doesn’t Juu look kinda sunburned?』

『Giyeon: His face is pretty red.』

『Juu: I put on lots of sunscreen though...... why......?』

『Jeho: Want us to make you some shade?』

『Juu: No...... natural sunlight’s too precious to waste.』

『Juu: Giyeon, eat this.』

『Giyeon: When did you remove all the bones?』

『Jeho: He sat in front of the fire for thirty minutes.』

『Juu: There were a lot of tiny bones.......』

Even while acting like they survived purely because they happened to still be alive, viewers caught all the little moments where they quietly took care of each other.

On the final night, footage aired of Park Juu sitting alone on the windy beach diligently scribbling something down. The notebook Lee Cheonghyeon had gifted him before departure was visible. The interview filmed on the first night played alongside it.

『Juu: Cheonghyeon told me I absolutely had to keep a diary in the notebook. He said he wanted to hear everything that happened on the island.』

『PD: You’re the first person we’ve ever had write a diary on a deserted island.』

『Juu: But I might not be able to write one.......』

The next scene showed Park Juu desperately searching through the bushes for anything that could function as ink.

He hadn’t brought any writing utensils.

And after all that suffering, the tool Park Juu finally found was......

『Juu: Today’s also the last day for my charcoal pen.』

......charcoal.

He pulled several half crumbling burnt branches from the fire pit and used the filming lights to write in his diary.

『Smoked fiㄷ』

Due to the tragic limitations of his writing utensil’s durability, he often failed to finish writing entire words, but Park Juu diligently continued recording stories for his younger member, repeatedly switching out his “pen.” Apparently he’d picked up some skill over the past few days, because by now he’d become surprisingly proficient at it.

『......The sky is really beautiful.

Next time, let’s come together.』

Park Juu’s final deserted island diary entry ended with something terrifyingly warm. If it were Lee Cheonghyeon, he’d definitely follow along without hesitation, which honestly worried me.

Sure enough, that bastard Lee Cheonghyeon was already looking up island tours.

≫ Unless the members themselves want it, can we stop chanting for solo activities already~

The kids themselves said they like promoting together, so leave them alone

If they say they want solo albums later once they’ve built enough seniority and gained some influence in the company, then support them at that point instead of acting like they’re betraying the group by trying to survive alone

The members’ obvious closeness completely sealed the discussion surrounding the solo activity controversy that had started this entire situation in the first place.

It became easy comfortable content to watch, while also neatly resolving the earlier issue, so the reaction among Sparklers ended up pretty positive too.

‘Well, if everyone’s happy, I guess that’s enough.’

We could always restore their more polished image during the next comeback anyway. For now, I decided to be satisfied that we’d at least managed to survive this massive ordeal.

Still, before going to sleep, [N O V E L I G H T] I should probably make a note in Dotion.

‘Absolutely ban all stranded survival concepts.’