Beers and Beards-Chapter 70Book 4, : Fun at the Bee-ach

“Pete,” Mirelda asked with a note of concern. “Why is there a giant bee-lady laying on the sand?”

I glanced over at where Henbeetta was lounging on an enormous towel, posing like a pinup model in a Maxim magazine, one long jet-black leg crossed tantalizingly over the other. She was wearing a bikini style top over her fuzzy chest, with a frilly skirt-like bottom that didn’t really cover anything.

I didn’t know whether to grin or grimace. “We made a deal. She was desperate to get out of her dungeon and away from the ‘incessant cloying of her subjects’, and we were desperate for some royal jelly. Oh, and I wanted to keep her as an ally because she’s really freaking scary.”

She had a host of powerful Abilities that went beyond her [Royal Adoration] aura, including the same [Royal Command] that I’d seen the King of Crack use in the arena a while back. She was also a beast in combat, with high Agility and a massive Strength. She could quite literally float like a butterfly and sting like a bee the size of a Buick. Oh, and she had translation Abilities, so she could talk to other people right out of the gate.

All in all, she was a monster in every sense of the word.

Even if my hind brain kept saying she was the most gorgeous flower I’d ever laid eyes upon.

“I give her a vacation every once in a while, and she provides Hive honey and royal jelly. It even teleports here with her, so no transport required,” I explained. That little trick was actually a pretty massive cheat that I was going to need to figure out how to abuse.

“But is this… okay? For her to just be out like this?” Mirelda asked with concern. Unlike Henbeetta, she was wearing a more conservative one-piece, with an elven style sarong to keep the sun from crisping her legs.

I rolled my eyes. “Look around.”

At least a dozen buff and muscular giants, wearing a mix of swim trunks, banana hammocks, and street clothes, were loitering around Henbeetta. They were showering her with food, drink, and compliments, while doing their best to flex their various muscles. A pair of especially tall and tanned specimens, one with a straw-blonde mop and another with more black hair than a lumberjack, were lying on either side of her, chatting her up. I’d say they came up to her waist, and that was pushing it.

She made a buzzing laugh at something one of them said, and I tsk’ed.

We were currently on one of Grandia’s most well-known beaches. It had the sparkling white sand and clear blue surf that was necessary to be a true tourist trap. It was a beautiful summer day, and the sand shimmered with the scorching heat. Mirelda, Kirk, Berry, Joseph, team Brightstar and I had all decided to come and have a nice day at the beach now that the tribes didn’t need my immediate assistance.

With the ingredient list and easy access to said ingredients, Alba and co really did have enough to go on their own. There was a veritable army of [Mystics] trying different ratios and then using variations on [Refine Brew] and [Rapid Aging] to try and get Spiritual Nectar as soon as possible.

Which left me free to finally tour around Grandia. Which I was doing. Very slowly. On a beach towel.

“I want to bottle whatever she has and sell it,” Mirelda sighed.

“I think part of it is literal animal magnetism, so unless you want to ask a [Fleshwarper] to make you look like a cat-girl or something – “

“Eugh, no thank you. I wrote one furry book, and that was enough, thank you.”

“Suit yourself. Another mead?”

“Oooh, yes please. One of the fruity ones.”

“Here, try the Black Mead, next. It’s made with blackcurrants, and it’s just *muah* on days like today.” I made a chef’s kiss as I passed her a dark purple bottle.

She took a deep sip from the open lid then wiped her lips with an *ahhh*. “I’ve never had mead like this. It’s phenomenal!”

I nodded. “You won’t get meads like this without a local supplier.”

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Mirelda nudged me with her foot. “Good thing I have a local supplier.”

We smiled at each other for a solid ten seconds, before simultaneously coughing and turning away.

As the silence stretched, I blurted, “Speaking of books, how’re yer little plainsfolk novellas doing?”

“You mean my shameless propaganda?” Mirealda laughed. “My penny-absolutely-dreadfuls? They’re doing better than any of my other works, including that which shall not be spoken of in front of Pete.”

“Really?”

“Mhm! Joseph just sent word that it’s actually causing a real headache for the Grandian High Council. They’re not happy about all the new pressure from the populace to help the beastfolk. But they can’t really do anything about it, so they’re just plugging their ears for now. I hope it makes a difference soon.”

“Hey. You’ve almost single-handedly brought their plight into the public eye, so that’s already a big difference.” 𝙛𝒓𝓮𝙚𝔀𝒆𝒃𝓷𝒐𝓿𝙚𝓵.𝙘𝒐𝒎

“And what about you?” Mirelda swept some hair over her ear. “What’s the Forefather of Brewing going to do for his next big hurrah? Maybe take over the local rum industry? Revolutionize vodka? Introduce sparkling wine?”

“Sparkling wine could be interesting,” I agreed. “But I really want a vacation; that was my original goal in coming here. I’m thinking of spending the rest of summer in Grandia just chilling on the beaches and enjoying the good weather. At least long enough to see what happens with the Coalition. Then when autumn hits, maybe head to the Northern mountain range for some skiing. There’s a few gnomish enclaves still up there. After that? A cruise? Head down south to tour the savannah? I’ll have the time, and as long as I hit the dungeons I can go back whenever I want.”

Mirleda sighed. “That sounds wonderful.”

“You want to come?” I asked offhandedly.

“Could I?”

“Dunno, can you? Do you have the working limbs and time to do so? Is there a dad I need to get permission from first?”

She stuck her tongue out at me. “Not that I know of.”

“You have limbs you don’t know about??” I feigned shock.

“Ugh, you know what I meant.” She gave me a blinding smile. “It could be fun. And this place really is a marvel. I’m in a Fantasy World! I should really go see the sights!”

We paused as Raysdotter and Starshine chased down Aishablue then buried her in the sand. Henbeetta had moved down to the water and was delicately putting one foot into the surf while her paramours stood ready to ‘save’ her.

“And I’ll even leave the peanut gallery at home.” I grumbled. “Now that I can summon the likes of the Bee and Beaver, I really don’t need constant bodyguards.”

“Probably for the best.” Mirelda giggled. Then ran a finger back and forth over her collarbone. “So, just you and me?”

Charisma, don’t fail me now! “Why not? I enjoy your company. You’re fun to talk to, smart, and a stunning example of a statuesque giantess.”

She arched her brow. “Even compared to the queen bee over there?”

“Yup. Even without a beard.”

“Hah! High praise indeed! A beard, eh? I guess I could grow something out. There must be alchemical concoctions for that. I don't know that I’ve met many bald folks since coming to Erd.”

“I’ve seen a few. Mostly those hairless [Berzerkers].”

“I think that’s a choice.”

I guffawed. “Weird choice.”

“Maybe there’s a purpose? It’s easier to wash all the blood off after a fight?”

“Is that why they mostly go naked too?”

“Oooh! That’s a valid hypothesis!”

I pointed at her. “See? I can sit here and talk about the value of naked hairlessness to a dwarven berzerker, and you don’t think I’m nuts!”

“Oh, I wouldn’t go that far!” Mirelda passed her empty glass back to me. “But I will need more to drink.”

I reached out to take the glass, and my fingers brushed hers. Her breath caught, and I held her hand in mine, as I asked seriously. “Will you come with me, Mirelda? To see the world? Just you and me?”

Mirelda squirmed for a moment, then blurted, “Okay! I will! I like hanging out with you too! Ugh! There, I said it! Now pour me more alcohol!”

I poured her another glass and when it was full, she hopped to her feet, her face scarlet.

“I need to use the bathroom,” As she passed me, she bent down and placed a kiss on my cheek. Then she padded off, hips swaying.

Phew.

What’s up Gods? No quests? That was the hardest thing I’d done yet on Erd!

*Bing!*

Quest Complete: A Spirited Drink

They did it! I guess you technically helped, so you can get the quest completion reward.

Spiritual Nectar: 1/1 Crafted

Reward: [Friend: Beastfolk]

Oh.

Well, that was good too!