The Lycan king-Chapter 29

*Leonora*

I was feeling something for Jax. I knew it the moment he got up to open the door for the girl. I knew it the moment he pulled her into the room and kissed her. I knew it the moment he pushed her into the bed. I knew it the moment tears gathered in my eyes and I softly cried, not wanting them to hear me. I was lucky that she couldn’t see me in the darkness, if not she’ll be able to put things together.

I hated the fact that he could hold another girl and make love to her whenever he pleases but I couldn’t. I remembered the first time I went out to the bar for drinks. I remembered how a man approached me and we really hit it off but I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t go home with him. I couldn’t dance with him. It felt like was betraying something or someone.

But Jax possibly couldn’t feel that way. A few minutes into their love making session, she left in annoyance. I could tell from the way she spoke to him after, telling him off for not getting it up for her and how she felt he was tired of her. I was so lucky she didn’t spot me as she walked out of the room.

It had been a few minutes since she left and it was just Jax and I in his room. Silence. I had calmed down and was just laying on my makeshift bed. I was getting cold and I didn’t have a blanket to cover with so I moved myself into a fetal position.

"Leonora, come to bed." I heard Jax say. There was no way I could stay on that filthy bed. That bed was defiled right before my eyes. I couldn’t do that to myself. No. I hated this space we were in. I hated the fact that I was bothered by Jax and his mysterious girl. I hated that I was crying because of them.

I hated that I was jealous.

"Leonora, come to bed. This is an order." He said and I begrudgingly stood up. I picked up my blanket because I didn’t want to share with him. I didn’t want his hands over my body. I didn’t want him to touch me. I walked over to the bed and sat by the edge, holding my blanket to my chest. "I couldn’t do it. I couldn’t do it knowing I was hurting you. I’m so sorry." I heard him say but I didn’t bat an eyelash. He wouldn’t be apologizing now if he had just sent her back. "Leonora, get in bed." I followed my order and laid at the far left side of the bed. I felt him move around until he was behind me, his body pressed up against mine as he placed his hand on my stomach and pulled me into his warm embrace.

"Leonora, you’re not ugly and I rejected you because you’re an omega. If you weren’t an omega, I would not reject you. Right now I’m even contemplating taking back the rejection because I can’t hide what I feel." He whispered in my ear. "I can’t hide how bad I want you and this is not even my wolf. I used to watch you before I found out you were my mate." He confessed. I didn’t know what to say or even why he was saying it. All I know was that I just wanted to leave here. Even if he didn’t realize it, his words had so much impact on me.

I don’t know why.

"I like you, Leonora." He mumbled against my skin. It felt like I could breathe. My plan was working but why did I feel a twinge of sadness in my heart. The plan was working and all that was left was for me to accept his rejection but not just yet. I had so many thoughts roaming through my brain and most of it was focused on this butterfly feeling in my stomach.

"Jax, we need to go to sleep." I said dismissing him. I didn’t want to have this conversation just yet. I wasn’t even sure what I wanted for myself. If I had the opportunity to date Jax, would I take it? A large part of me would but no. He is our enemy. He is the bad guy. He had put me through so much and that made me unhappy for years. He was the thorn in my flesh. 𝕗𝐫𝐞𝕖𝕨𝐞𝗯𝚗𝕠𝘃𝐞𝚕.𝐜𝗼𝚖

"Let’s cuddle." He suggested. He didn’t really suggest as he lifted me up and placed me on his chest. I adjusted myself so that I could be comfortable. I felt him place a kiss on my forehead and my heart skipped a beat. "You know, I couldn’t have sex today. All I kept thinking about was you. I want you so bad but I know you’ll only turn me on and leave me wanting more. I don’t mind waiting. As long as I get to have you all to myself."

"Jax..." I trailed off. I didn’t know what else to say or do. This arrangement wasn’t good for the both of us. Jax needed his fix and I needed to breathe. This was what I would call a forced proximity relationship. It wasn’t real. Nothing was. Jax’s supposed feelings for me were just fake. Once we were apart, this would mean nothing and I could feel it.

I wasn’t worth it.

I wasn’t worth the hassle of mating. I wasn’t worth the hassle of dating. I wasn’t worth it.

"Leonora." He called my name and I sighed. I couldn’t believe that I almost, almost fell for him. Fell for his charm. This was just a game. I just needed to be on guard and make a plan. A better plan. I know it will get to a point that I wouldn’t be able to handle this but when that time comes, I’ll be prepared and ready.